Spy (Team Fortress 2)

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Spy loves baguettes

“This was a disappointment.”

~ Spy after dying

“And worst of all, he could be anyone of us...”

~ BLU Spy about RED Spy

The Spy is Team Fortress 2’s resident backstabbing, cigarette-smoking, suit-wearing Frenchman. Equipped with an arsenal of deception and a voice so smooth it could sell sand to the Sahara, he specializes in making people say, "Oh, come on!" before rage-quitting. His main job is to stab people in the back, disguise as their teammates, and make them question reality itself. In short, he is the reason your Engineer friend has trust issues.

Weapons of Deception[edit | edit source]

  • Knife: More specifically, the "Congratulations, you’re dead now" tool. Spy’s entire life revolves around sneaking behind people and introducing them to its sharp, business end.
  • Revolver: For when things go terribly wrong (which they will), the Spy’s trusty revolver is there to ensure he at least dies with style.
  • Sapper: Designed to destroy the hopes and dreams of Engineers everywhere, the sapper turns sentries, dispensers, and teleporters into expensive paperweights.
  • Cloaking Devices: Because disappearing in the middle of a firefight is not just a magic trick, it’s a lifestyle.

Playstyle[edit | edit source]

Playing Spy is a delicate balance between looking cool and getting instantly obliterated. Either you pull off an epic chain-stab massacre, or you get caught trying to act casual near a sentry and die immediately. There is no in-between.

Spy excels in psychological warfare, making opponents so paranoid that they start shooting at their own teammates just in case. This leads to situations where an entire team is unloading bullets into an innocent Medic while the real Spy backstabs all of them in the confusion. It’s a beautiful thing.

How to spot a Spy:[edit | edit source]

  • If they’re not shooting at the enemy, it’s a Spy.
  • If they’re running towards your sentry with suspicious enthusiasm, it’s a Spy.
  • If your Engineer suddenly starts breakdancing with electricity, it was definitely a Spy.

Spy's relationship with other classes[edit | edit source]

  • Engineer: Spy’s favorite victim. He takes great pleasure in ruining an Engie’s carefully crafted machinery and then whispering sweet insults in his ear before stabbing him. It’s like a toxic ex, but with more explosions.
  • Sniper: The Spy’s natural prey. Nothing personal, mate, but if you’re standing still, you’re basically begging to be turned into a corpse with a fancy French accent.
  • Pyro: Spy’s mortal enemy. If you see a Pyro, don’t even bother fighting—just accept your fate and prepare for the next respawn.
  • Heavy: A difficult but satisfying target. Taking out a Heavy is like seducing a rich person: tricky, but once you get past the bodyguards, the rewards are great.
  • Medic: The heart of any team, and therefore an important target. The best Spies know how to take out a Medic at the perfect moment to ruin an enemy push. Also, Medics scream the funniest when stabbed.

Conclusion[edit | edit source]

Spy is the gentleman assassin of Team Fortress 2, bringing equal parts frustration and finesse to the battlefield. Whether you’re chain-stabbing through an entire team or getting instantly incinerated by a Pyro with trust issues, playing Spy is always an adventure. Just remember: Spy is the best class. If you think otherwise, go fuck yourself.

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