User talk:Apecat

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Welcome![edit source]

Hello, Apecat, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for n00bs:

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button (Button sig.png) above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, or ask at the Dump. Again, welcome!  HOMESTAR ME!!! TURTLE ME!!! t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 05:00, 17 June 2006 (UTC)

God Jul![edit source]

You best get that cursor out of my face, bitch. Happy Birthday, Jesus Santa!
This holiday season, whether you're Protestant, Jewish, Catholic,
Muslim, Buddhist, Shintoist, agnostic, or atheist, DiZ wishes you a
Merry Christmas, so suck it up and drink your eggnog. And don't forget,
Santa's got snipers everywhere, and they're always loaded.

So be good, or else.

Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year! Actually, I have no idea what 2007 will be like and I know my wishes have no power over the outcome, but you get the idea.  ;-D --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 21:29, 18 December 2006 (UTC)

  • Wow, dude, thanks for that absolutely wonderful coca cola crazed junkie drug cartel Santa. I have nothing better to sodomize your eyes with than this sober warning to all druggies out there waiting for deliveries: the DEA will catch your mule!

Apecat 02:58, 19 December 2006 (UTC)

Kan du hjälpa mig?[edit source]

I've heard rumors saying you know Swedish. Just like I do.
I've also heard you could help me with my little problem.

I recently started my own wiki, and would like to have a <coose>-function for the "Did You Know That"-page, but it doesn't seem to work. Do I need to create some special template or is it something in the PHP-code?
/Abbedabb 21:07, 12 March 2007 (UTC)

Hej Abbedabb! Tyvärr så I don't know any php. I've tried out running a mediawiki on my own machine once or twice, and I have copypasted some code to make a page tell me the uptime of my linux boxes.. and i run a vanity site with wordpress. But that's about it :C. Jag antar that you could try asking in #mediawiki @freenode (if you use mediawiki for your project..) if you've already googled yourself gul och blå. Dunno vem som upphöjt mig till skyarna som innehavare av all tänkbar kunskap på #uncyclopedia, men jag är bara yet another flumhumanist :P
/apecat 02:31, 13 March 2007 (UTC)

APECAT[edit source]

I said I'd do it, and it is done. Here is your DiZ-rended portrait, depicting your apecatness in all its glory: Image:Apecat1.JPG. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 20:01, 29 May 2007 (UTC)

  • haha, it's fucking epic XD Apecat 20:08, 30 May 2007 (UTC)

Sweet Christ![edit source]

Apecat

I thank you humbly for the opportunity to impose myself upon the tiny box marked Today's featured article. My own little box in this dark corner of the interweb. My welcoming visage, greeting all who visit this cartoonish funhouse of crazy people. The depravity, flowing like gravy down the chin of a senator. This is my honor.

Much appreciated, you bastard.

Yours always,

Duke
(dictated but not read. Transcripted by your pal, THINKER 04:33, 8 August 2007 (UTC).)

Bloody Pagans[edit source]

PremierTomMayfairCheXMAS.png
Pagans, the Whole Lot of Yous

Premier Tom Mayfair has been a naughty boy this year, but he still deserves a kiss from under the mistletoe. His external organ is fair game.

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