User:Simsilikesims/F-bomb
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Somebody set up us the bomb. For great justice take off every 'zig'. |
“My neighbours and I have been exchanging F-bombs for some time now. I guess that's why I got cancelled.”
The F-bomb is often confused with someone saying the F-word, but that's not what an F-bomb is. An F-bomb is a bomb that can do anything that starts with the letter "F" and can cause massive damage to anyone or any thing. (And that includes the ever so strong Chuck Norris.) Since the F-bomb can do damage in a way that starts with "F", there are many different F-bombs.
Powerful F-bombs[edit | edit source]
- Fissure Bomb
- Creates large fissures in the ground that can sink large buildings, trap people in side them, and defeat Godzilla (or Gojira for non-nerdish people).
- Fracture Bomb
- Will fracture anything in its blast radius, including body parts.
- Finishing Bomb
- Finishes off any unfinished work an earlier F-bomb started. Not to be used as first attack on other countries, it will be totally ineffective.
- FAIA Bomb
- Constructs very large buildings that produce harmful chemicals that will soon kill everyone in that general area. This bomb is basically an FAIA member on caffeine and steroids.
- Fusion Bomb
- Fuses anything in its blast radius together. Even people.
- Philosophy Bomb
- Gives everyone great knowledge to share among one another. Sooner or later, they will argue, fight, then use other powerful F-bombs on each other (takes awhile but everyone will die at some point in life).
- Fake Bake Bomb (Super)
- Will insta-tan everyone in sight with a blinding light, in fact anyone who looks at the light will be blinded until 2360 A.C.E.. This tan is only temporary because it's a fake tan cause by fake UV waves. The knowledge of the fake tan will cause people to become irritable and want to kill others that have nothing to do with the dropping of the Super Fake Bake Bomb.
- Flame Bomb
- Makes a very large flame appear. This flame will summon the fire god, Oof, who will kill -17 Civilization.
- Fright Bomb
- Causes all within range to quake with fear and/or run around in a fit of panic.
FAFSA Bomb: Devastates entire area with massive amounts of merit based loans and a few need based grants (but grants are so rare and will probably never happen to you so its probably not even worth mentioning). The total effect of a FAFSA attack is not fully understood until 4-6 years later when FAFSA infected victims find themselves tens of thousands of US dollars (or 18 and a half Euros)in debt.
Less powerful F-bombs[edit | edit source]
- Fart Bomb
- Causes everyone to hold their nose and leave the room.
- Foresight Bomb
- Causes everyone to foresee that they are about to get bombed again.
- Fool Bomb
- Causes a storm of foolish articles like this one.
- Fat Bomb
- Causes obesity
- Fee Bomb
- Causes expense
- Foreplay Bomb
- Causes erections
- Fork Bomb
- Releases large quantities of sharp, pointy metal forks.
- Filth Bomb
- Releases large quantities of dirt and trash.
Weak F-bombs[edit | edit source]
- Fudge Bomb
- Causes those within range to drool over the scent of chocolatey goodness.
- Fish Bomb
- Causes a stinky mess if not cleaned up within 2-4 hours.
- Flush Bomb
- Causes toilets to flush simultaneously.
- Flight Bomb
- Flies aimlessly in circles until the charge runs out.
- Fluff Bomb
- Releases huge quantities of feathers
- Fake Bomb
- Guaranteed to be a dud every time.
- Flower Bomb
- Showers or bathes everyone within range with soft petals.
- Fission Bomb
- Fizzles out.
Why F-bombs are taboo[edit | edit source]
Although it may be fun dropping F-bombs left and right, they have become taboo because of their violent nature. It all happened after Zues blew up Pangaea with an F-bomb. Ever since that day I think happened, all F-bombs have been considered illegal, but still extremely fun. Some people keep F-bombs hidden in barns disguised as WD-40s, which are disguised as cows and horses. There are still F-bombs in the military and meth dealer's basements, but they have yet to catch interest in the public's view. They have also been proven to be able to destroy pinball machines, which are obviously indestructible.