My Sig[edit | edit source]

-- ^{REGRET
TENENBAUM}_{Regret
Tenenbaum}

-- REGRETTENENBAUM ♠ ♥ ♣ ♦

(i)[1]User:VGDictator/secretgame → User:VGDictator/secretgame/searchdesk →  User:VGDictator/secretgameback → [1]
                                 → User:VGDictator/secretgame/wait → [dead]
                                 → User:VGDictator/secretgame/takepill → [dead]
                                 → User:VGDictator/secretgame/lockeddoor → [1]
                                                                         →  User:VGDictator/secretgame/randkeypad → [dead]
                                                                         →  User:VGDictator/secretgame/exit → User:VGDictator/secretgame/stressful_death → [dead]
                                                                                                            → User:VGDictator/secretgame/killingyourself → [dead]
                                                                                                            → User:VGDictator/secretgame/jellydonut → User:VGDictator/secretgame/brokenwindowout → [dead]
                                                                                                                                                    → User:VGDictator/secretgame/1408 → [dead]

Blackjack ideas[edit | edit source]

^Q♠

Expression error: Unrecognized punctuation character "{".

Template:A-K Template:Blackjack Template:Suit

^{{{1}}}♥ ^{{{2}}}♥ YOU: {{{3}}}

^{{{4}}}♥ ^{{{5}}}♥ DEALER: {{{6}}}

{{{7}}}

Score:0

Q♠

Just in case[edit | edit source]

It is with the saddest heart that I must pass on the following news: Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours. Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he still, as a crusty old man, was considered a roll model for millions. Doughboy is survived by his wife, Play Dough; two children John Dough and Jane Dough; plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes

IRC Favorites[edit | edit source]

<Regret> anywho... I got bad news...

<MoneySign> :(

<Regret> my pet crab died.

<MoneySign> How did he taste, though?

<Regret> dee-licoius... but that's beside the point.

<MoneySign> Every cloud has a silver lining.

- - xstrike_9999 [n=zaeemsho@203.99.184.93] has joined #uncyclopedia

<Regret> weird thing is, i think it drowned.

<MoneySign> Uhm...

<Regret> do crabs drown?

<MoneySign> Crabs don't drown, do they?

<MoneySign> I don't know...

<MoneySign> Did he drown in boiling water?

<Regret> xstrike_9999: can crabs drown?

<Regret> no, normal, tempid water...

<MoneySign> Hmmm...

<MoneySign> Odd.

<Regret> very

<MoneySign> Maybe it wasn't a crab.

<Regret> oh, i didn't think of that!

<MoneySign> Maybe you actually had a cat.

<Regret> gasp!

<MoneySign> Did it taste a bit like chicken?

<Regret> that is possible...

<Regret> it tasted like cat.

<xstrike_9999> they do if the water is boiling....XD

<MoneySign> Ah.

<MoneySign> Well, there's your explination.

<Regret> T_T

<MoneySign> R.I.P. Pussycrab.

<Regret> hahaha

<Regret> actually, my little brother and I decided on "John L. Picklesmell"

<xstrike_9999> now theres a thought a pussy with crabs.......*shivers*

<xstrike_9999> whats the L for?

<MoneySign> Nice name.

<Regret> hehehe

- - GreaseMonkey [n=gm@unaffiliated/greasemonkey] has joined #uncyclopedia

<MoneySign> It's rhyming slang.

<Regret> L? um... you know, L... from deathnot or something...

<Regret> *deathnote

<xstrike_9999> L n the name maybe longdick.........

<Regret> maybe....

<Regret> unlikely, but possible :P

<MoneySign> Did you check?

<Regret> Check... what?

<MoneySign> If he had ... an L...

<Regret> oh... um... OH!

<Regret> very yes.

<MoneySign> Ok, well... Another mystery solved, I'd say.

<Regret> yay!

<xstrike_9999> and i would have gotten away with it if it wasny for you meddling kids......XD

<Regret> hahahaha

<MoneySign> You know, adding XD at your own statements automatically makes them unfunny.

<Regret> what if your face is really like that... sideways and everything...

<MoneySign> Just freaky.

dot dot dot

<TheLedBalloon> well, we reminisced about the time this kid Chris who you all know as masterof9puppets took a shit out of a tree, aiming for one kid's hat

<TheLedBalloon> instead he hit another kids backpack

<Regret> wow...

<Regret> really?!

<TheLedBalloon> mhmm

<TheLedBalloon> so, the kid whose backpack it was grabbed a branch and wacked chris in the arm

<RAHB> damn...

<TheLedBalloon> hard.

<RAHB> hahaha

<TheLedBalloon> you could see a bruise after about 30 seconds

<Regret> ooh

<TheLedBalloon> a friend had the video on his phone, but his phone went through the wash

<TheLedBalloon> and one of the great artifacts of history was lost forever

<Regret> what a shame...

<TheLedBalloon > yeah...

<RAHB > hahahah

<Regret> I knew a kid...

<Regret> who really needed to take a dump during recess, but all the rest rooms where closed for mainatnance...

<Regret> so we had a kindly game of kickball instead...

<RAHB> XD

<TheLedBalloon> haha

<Regret> and it was his turn to kick...

<Regret> so he kicked the ball and what should come flying out of his pants but a big, steaming brown one...

<TheLedBalloon> oh jeez...

<TheLedBalloon> XD

<RAHB> HAHAHHAA

<Regret> humiliation ensues :D

<RAHB> best. story. ever

Mafia Awards[edit | edit source]

The Don's Seal of Approval[edit | edit source]

^{The Don's} Seal of Approval

The Don, Mr. Antonio "Snowmobile" Yettie, has officially deemed you-a "all right-a kinda person-a".

The Golden Hat Award[edit | edit source]

^The Golden Hat Award

For extraordinary excellence in accomplishment of the Family's goals, you've been awarded this prestigious hat. Wear it with pride.

or

Golden Hat (or something) {{{MONTH}}} {{{YEAR}}}

I love it. Especially what you've done with the Title Banner. Absolutely marvellous. I tried a Mafia QVFD ( Main Page (Delete It!) ), but it's.... er... not so great. I had a chat with some admins, and they said it wasn't the best Idea. I think perhaps merely adding the hat to QVFD entries will suffice. Expect a payment for these.

Thanks, Hex! Also, I'll be adding better pictures soon! -RT

Very good, but I'm not sure if these are the kinda things we could sell. These could be awarded for genuinely good deeds. How about something like "The Bank's Seal of Approval" which you can buy for $x? And a few others in a similar vein... - [15:45 11 September] Sir FSt Don

Yettie

Also what about templates similar to these that say represent 1 million guns. And could say something like "This user is the proud owner of exactly one million tommy guns"..or whatever. And you could buy things like that, you could have similar templates for cigars and other stuff, maybe? People could then proudly display there stuff wherever. - [15:47 11 September] Sir FSt Don

Yettie

That sounds like a userbox to me, but I'll do a few...

WARNING:

This user is big on warmth and is the proud owner of a shit-load of heaters. Watch yourself.

WARNING:

This user is a human arsenal and proudly owns 10, 000 guns of varying shapes and sizes. Watch your step.

My Mafia-speak isn't so good, change it if you like, make your own, whatever. Internet's bein' slow as molasses, I'll try again later... -- REGRETTENENBAUMIS DEAD TALK! 02:30, 16 September 2008 (UTC)

...Where a "shit-load" means 1, 000 and when you reach that you can display the second one? Kapiche? Thoughts? - [16:39 16 September] Sir FSt Don

Yettie

I can't think of anymore...ideas? -- REGRETTENENBAUMIS DEAD TALK! 02:36, 21 September 2008 (UTC)

How about one or two more (if it wouldn't be too much trouble, you're doing great stuff here!) template things along the lines of "this user won a game of Mafia-style golf, fair and square" and then something underneath that like "it only cost him 5000 bucks". Something along those lines, and maybe a second about winning some other sport, or maybe poker or the like? So they're like literally trophies (except they're not actual trophies, duh!) that you buy. Maybe there could be a specific "Don Something" trophy that only person could have at a time? And you could like sell it once you buy it and stuff...? Anyway, these are all just ideas. What do you think of 'em? - [09:14 21 September] Sir FSt Don

Yettie