User:Darth Cruentus

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This user is the descendant of Vikings and is proud of their family history of pillaging.
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This user's IQ is over 9000.
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This user is a paladin.
Hide your demons and undead.
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This idle layabout is a teenager, so hangs around bus stops in large intimidating groups and beats up old ladies for drug money. Or maybe they aren't one after all…
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This user a Republican, meaning they have a soul unlike DEMONcrats who kill babies!
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“Darth Cruentus!!!!!!! He's SO hot!!! *faint*”

~ Females in general on Darth Cruentus

“He frightens me.”

~ Donald Duck on Darth Cruentus

“Darth Cruentus definitely likes velociraptors.”

~ Jim Carrey on Darth Cruentus

“Oh hi Cruent..!!!!! Ugh...kkkslllskkkcclls.....”

~ Obama Bin Laden being strangled to death by Darth Cruentus

“He will kill you if you get in his way. He knows Kung Fu.”

~ Lt. General Jonathan Willingham on Darth Cruentus

“Didint he kill Donald Duck in the Kennewick War?”

~ Donald Duck on Darth Cruentus

“Darth Cruentus 知道非常非常小量的汉语。”

~ Some random chinese guy on Darth Cruentus

“Darth Cruentus definitely likes velociraptors.”

~ Jim Carrey on Darth Cruentus


Darth Cruentus about to kill Kamiakin Lt. Donald Duck in the Kennewick War.
There are no words that can describe Darth Cruentus's
Darth Cruentus's favorite pet, Moder.



His name[edit | edit source]

Darth is a word used by Sith as a title of power.

Cruentus is Latin for Bloodthirsty.


The very same year that Nathan Porter was born, Southridge was throwing a monkey wrench into the already waging Kennewick War. Nathan met a man by the name of Jonathan Willingham at Quinault Baptist Church. (Which is funny because neither claim to be Baptist) Originally they both swore pleaged to alleigance to Kennewick when they became of age, but they both determined that Kennewick sucked and switched sides to Southridge.

They both very quickly rose in the ranks to become two of Southridge's most feared commanders. But Nathan, in the year of 2006, designed his own side in the Kennewick War. Nathan created Delta. A group of mercenaries for hire, for all sides of the war. Delta became a great factor in the war, with their state of the art warriors. But at first no one would hire any Delta forces. So Nathan single handedly walked into a battle raging between Pasco and Richland and killed every soldier. That may not seem like much since it was Pasco and Richland but considering that each side had a brigade of troops it was pretty impressive. From that point on he was called Darth Cruentus. Massivley impressing all sides of the Kennewick War, Delta forces became extreamly high in demand. Darth Cruentus himself was hired by his old friend Willingham for Southridge. Delta's arrival revolutionized the Kennewick War.

Random And Unimportant Facts About Darth Cruentus[edit | edit source]

  • Darth Cruentus just happens to be spelt دارث كروَنتوس in arabic.
  • Darth Cruentus plays Emo Bingo every saturday night with Cyndi Lauper, Thor Smith, and Jerry Springer.
  • Darth Cruentus is enjoys Kitten Huffing.
  • Darth Cruentus is fluent in 1337.
  • Darth Cruentus can kill two stones with one bird.
  • Darth Cruentus eats tarantulas.
  • Darth Cruentus beat Obama to a bloody pulp. To bad demons dont die.
  • Darth Cruentus is sometimes called The One.
  • Darth Cruentus once gave Joseph Smith golden tablets as a joke.

Things Darth Cruentus Created Or Co-Created[edit | edit source]

Articles

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