UnNews:Kofi Annan's lunch: rap and a cheese sandwich

This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation.

3 September 2006

Kofi Annan is into that hardcore gangsta' rap, despite his position as a pacifist.

NEW YORK CITY, New York -- UN Secretary-General Kofi Annan was spotted wearing headphones in the United Nations headquarters dining hall earlier today, and when asked what he was listening to, he informed UnNews that he was listening to some Tupac. He also informed us that he was eating a cheese sandwich, which was free to employees in the lunchroom.

Despite Annan's regular lunch meal of KFC, today he decided to, "chill 'n listen to 'mah Pac,". When questioned what type of cheese was in the sandwich, Annan stated, "I dunno." Reports indicate that the mayonnaise may have been low in fat, suggesting Annan is going err from his old diet and is attempting to switch to a healthier diet.

According to Annan, he was listening to All Eyez on Me, a 1996 Tupac album which features several songs with Snoop Dogg and 4-Tay, including "Only God Can Judge Me", which Annan stated was his recent favorite.

Annan also had an iPod Shuffle. He gave UnNews a brief tour of his playlist, which included such artists as Dr. Dre and Redman. Annan also had an outdated PDA which he uses to watch BET wirelessly when Ambassadors to the United Nations won't shut up about their famines.

In early 2005, Annan's headphones were stolen by Jan Eliasson. The two haven't spoken since, and Annan has threatened to sanction Sweden on several occasions with the incident in mind.

As lunch ended, Annan shook our hands and informed us that we weren't authorized to be in the building. He was right. We snuck in through the back door when we heard they were giving out cheese sandwiches We thanked him and promptly left, but not without a token: we got his autograph on our foreheads.

On a side note, the entire sandwich was eaten.

Sources

• N/A "UN -- Free cheese sandwich!" Frozen Bears, September 03, 2006