UnNews:Feminist Reach Goal in Converts for 2007

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
UnNews Logo Potato.png This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation.

28 December 2007

SAN FRANCISCO, California -- Feminists announced yesterday that they reached this years goal of converting males into transsexuals. After tallying their figures, they say that they have not only reached their goal of 30,000, but exceeded it by another 15,310, giving them a combined conversion of 45,310 people -- about the size of your own town).

One feminist, who wished to remain anonymous, was overjoyed in hearing the news. She said, "I'm glad that males are figuring out that being female will make them happier than being a male."

One transsexual-in-training at the local feminist camp, Camp Tittiesbutnococka, said, "I'm glad I'm going to become female. They gave some strange drug and now I just have a hard time choosing which bra to pick for today. I hate my own penis now."

Camp Tittiesbutnococka is a 100-acre complex located deep, deep, deep in a heavily forested area said. It was built 37 years ago, after some early feminist explorers deeply penetrated the forest.

Feminist spokeswoman Ann Coulter, shown here after being shot in the face by Rush Limbaugh.

Ann Coulter (no relation to Marisa Coulter of the book and/or film, "The Golden Compass"), leader of |The New Feminists for America said, "This is one proud day for Girl Power. If men had brains, they would be women. We have changed our views since the 80s. Instead of pushing for the ERA, we decided to convert the world into one gender through the means of science."

Prominent men like Rush Limbaugh fired back at the Feminists' plot -- to convert men and create a one gender world (or OGW) -- and also called Ann a bitch, a slut, and a whore. "You see, you went and got poor old, senile Pat Robertson confused, and that caused him to endorse Rudy Giuliani for President." Limbaugh went on to say that scientists are creating a human by using two embryos without the use of sperm and creating sex organs from stem cells which explains his case of feminists are converting men to women. Then he shot Ms. Coulter in the face.

In the end, Limbaugh can shoot as many feminists as he wants in the face, but it doesn't change the fact that their recruitment drive goals were not only met, but exceeded this year.

Sources[edit | edit source]