Dinosaur extinction theory

This is a real meteor crater located in Stanistan as opposed to the fake one created by Luis Walter Avarez to gain some fame

The Dinosaur extinction theory is the theory that dinosaurs went extinct. Just because stupid dickhead scientists think that there are no more dinosaurs left in the 21st century, that does not mean that dinosaurs are extinct.

Theories

Cretaceous-paleogene exticntion theory

Only the most idiotic and retarded dickheads believe that dinosaurs are extinct.

Meteor impact

The fake meteor invented by Luis Alvarez in 1970 so he could gain attention and become famous

It is thought that a meteor that hit the nonexistent country of Mexico killed off the dinosaurs. When the "meteor" hit, plants would have died out and the herbivores would have starved. Once the herbivores were dead, the carnivores would be left with no food, until they too starved.

In 1970, Luis Walter Alvarez, likely high on G Fuel at the time, claimed to have discovered a meteor crater in Chixculub, a place as real as Atlantis. No one thought anything of it being a hoax until the 90's, when the empty, nonexistant no-man Mexican Army was sent to investigate. They found no signs of a crater and had Alvarez sent to the naughty step for telling lies.

Alien abduction

The second theory, which was a hoax created in 1967, is alien abduction. Alien fossils have been found in rocks as early as 70 million years. Aliens and dinosaurs are thought to have peacefully coexisted until around 65 million years ago, when war broke out. The war is said to have resulted in major losses on the dinosaur side and victory for the aliens. The remaining dinosaurs probably died from starvation.

In 1988, Thomas Krankwell said that there was no evidence of a war of that scale at that time. He said that not enough slaughtered dinosaurs have been found and dated to 65 million years ago. He also supported the claim that this theory was revealed to him in a dream.

Paleocene-Eocene thermal maximum extinction theory

During the Paleocene-Eocene thermal maximum (50 million years ago), temparatured rised by about 5-8 degrees Celcius. Some scientists believed that the surviving dinosaurs could not cope with a rise in temperature. They say that the internal organs of the dinosaurs were "sizzled to a fuck" and the dinosars "dropped dead for no reason". They also believed that the mammals ate the remains of the fucked dinosaurs and became stronger.

Chalcolithic extinction theory

A dinosaur spotted on April 20, 1969 (420 69). Proof their not extinct.

A large number of scientists believe that during the Ice Age, the dinosaurs experienced severe habitat loss and were overhunted by humans, killing off many species. They think that the final refuge of the dinosaurs was Acambaro, Mexico, where the Acambaro figurines were found.

In 1944, good Ol' German Mr. Waldemar Julsrud was walking near the town of Acámbaro and found a figurine that looked like a dinosaur. He declared this as proof of Acambaro being the final refuge for dinosaurs. He and his hobo farmer friend found more dinosaur figurines and clay figurines of people, such as Egyptians, Sumerians, and "bearded Caucasians", proof that humans interacted and hunted dinosaurs.

Gabriella Chockery, in 2014, supported this theory. She said that no clay dinosaur figurines have been dated to younger than 2500BC, proving that dinosaurs probably went extinct around 2500BC but dinosaurs have been seen since April 20, 1969 so their clearly not extinct.

Reverse evolution theory

This theory postulates that the dinosaurs evolved in the opposite direction that one might expect: rather than developing larger brains, they grew smaller in size, and as their brains and bodies shrunk, instead of walking upright, dinosaurs first walked on all fours, then crawled back into the depths of the ocean, where they developed fins and gills, becoming first amphibians, then resembling shark-like creatures. It is from these creatures that the legend of "Jaws" springs.

Modern extinction theory

A dinosaur eyeball, found in 1919, ended up in the collection of Sir Leoanrd Brackwell. He dated the find to between 1300 and 1315 and he argued that it may have come from an animal known as Polythermas chichli, a bird which went extinct in 1322. More recent evidence suggests that P. chichli may have been a dinosaur and not a bird.

The Truth

All of these stupid theories are wrong because dinosaurs have been seen alive since April 20, 1969 (Meme Day) so their clearly not extinct and all the people who say dinosaurs are extinct are wrong.