User:SPIKE/Deadends-10

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From Andorin Kato re: VFD of Modern warfare 2[edit | edit source]

A couple things you said on VFD have left me confused. Please elaborate.

“The excellent "tl;dr" meme fills a great need. But a medium-sized paragraph in defense of a controversial nomination is not tl;dr. How about unsigned nomination, unexpired {WIP}, no {VFD}?”

Unsigned nomination? Yes, I forgot to put {{VFD}} on the page, but it was, like, four in the morning. But unsigned nomination? Where?

“Breaks out of encyclopedic character to chat with, CHEST-THUMP TO, and nag, the reader. There is obvious vandalism in the article, but a lot of stuff that's ambiguous vandalism. But streams of irrelevant babble is a trait you esteemed in Berlinlandstan this week, on your way to honoring it as an archetypally bad article. I don't know what your criteria are, and I don't know why this nomination is valid. Suggest we pull {rewrite/hard} from the page and inform them in 36pt that we don't like their work and that they should get user names, read their talk pages, and get serious about writing humor.”

I have never touched Berlinlandstan. I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about here. Are you sure you aren't confusing me with someone else? --Andorin Kato 21:52, November 24, 2009 (UTC)

I see what I did! The final paragraph of your entry is indented and I interpreted it as a rebuttal to the paragraph above it, which I read as an unsigned nomination and Delete vote. Your "tl;dr" seemed like a sarcastic deprecation of that first paragraph by someone else, to which I replied that that paragraph was not too long to read, and if you wanted to criticise him, there were other valid ways to do so. I didn't list them to pick on you.
And yes indeed, you were not involved in the VFD vote on Berlinlandstan and the remarks in my Delete vote are addressed to "you" meaning Uncyclopedia in general. Several voters, not including you, voted Keep citing the exact rational that some of us used to vote Delete--leading Hyperbole to guess that they were calling it "So bad it's good." My point in the vote on Modern warfare 2: When, then, is an article "so bad it's good"--and when is it just bad?!
I'm sorry for the confusion, and didn't mean to pile on you personally, as it must have seemed. Spıke ¬  22:34 24-Nov-09
Yeah, I couldn't really figure out how to perfectly indent the second paragraph of my nom, and since it was late I felt that the indentation sufficed for my purposes. No worries, though. Thanks for clarifying! --Andorin Kato 22:43, November 24, 2009 (UTC)
I've just added a suitable clarification to my response to you in the VFD box, and changed "you" to "y'all" in my Comment, even though the vote is closed. Cheers! Spıke ¬  22:50 24-Nov-09

From LisaKachold[edit | edit source]

ShameLESS LOVE[edit | edit source]

L!$@ Lisalisa.jpg(Meow!)(Contribs) 05:48, December 28, 2009 (UTC)

Thanks for putting my cat in the box! I think that was going to be a problem...... giggle giggle giggle! L!$@ Lisalisa.jpg(Meow!)(Contribs)

Your work Made it! It's an excellent page... Contratulations! L!$@ Lisalisa.jpg(Meow!)(Contribs) 20:10, 25 January 2010

BLUE Moon Tonight[edit | edit source]

It's a blue moon tonight! Once in a blue moon, you drag from depths of your literary genius soul something that transpires even UnNews genius? I doubt I can get this shaped up in time to make the presses for the event tonight, however.... Oh Well L!$@ Lisalisa.jpg(Meow!)(Contribs) 00:46, 31 December 2009

SPIKE? Could you please critique rip apart Arizona again? I need motivation! Talk page has a list all ready for your recommendations? I also nominated work for highlight --> got two votes now. It's good! Thanks L!$@ Lisalisa.jpg(Meow!)(Contribs) 08:41, 2 January 2010

Obsomething[edit | edit source]

I admit I am still none the wiser what Lisa Kachold's article is all about except it is some feud about a word. Still I am surprised she is signing in here as herself (or at least the name used elsewhere). Keep up the good work all the same and it is a relief that at least I can engage in a reasonable conversation here without someone going nuclear on me. All the best for the New Year too ! --Laurels.gifRomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 18:27, December 28, 2009 (UTC)

Thanks for the pleasant words! Lisa evidently has been a member of on-line "communities" since their invention and might not worry about data privacy. Last night was the first time I edited an article suspecting that someone else was editing it at the same time. My worry, that she is not here to write humor but to recruit allies, is not yet quieted; but after instigation, she took the lead at transforming Obnosis from a bill of particulars to a good laugh. For my best recent attempt to maintain a conversation that had gone nuclear with a young flamethrower, see Talk:Barack Obama#Gynecology. Spıke ¬  19:42 28-Dec-09
I read the comments and you were polite to the wayward contributor. In fact the discussion was a pretty serious conversation about the U.S. President rather than trying to work out what can be done on the satire content of it. It will be a page to watch as Barack Obama has another three years at least in that top job. --Laurels.gifRomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 23:44, December 28, 2009 (UTC)
CRIPES!!! Spıke ¬  23:49 28-Dec-09
If you go back further in that talk page (to Section 8.1), the same wayward contributor gets even more overtly into advocacy, so much so that Andorin Kato paid a visit to rein it back in. More recently, I may have gotten him to consider writing his own Obama article in line with his "wacky" humor style. Spıke ¬  06:33 30-Dec-09

Musicology[edit | edit source]

Musicology, an attempt to force-fit music onto Scientology, was on VFD and I asked LisaKachold to attempt the save.

I'd like to play with the page too. Lisa put up a VFD'ed tag, which I took off because it hasn't been huffed yet. And I owe you some work for running the Ozzy page byyou. Thanks, Al in Chinas 19:13 1 Feb. MMX

Cripes! I didn't even know I had a debt to collect from you, and now you're going to cash it in by volunteering to rescue an article that already had a rescuer, which you wanted to do anyway, and which I wasn't going to do in any case! Getting off cheaply, aren't you?! Spıke ¬  19:37 1-Feb-10

Edit conflict. Mentioned that the article is actually a pretty good one if someone knows Scientology, and it will be a pleasure to play with. OK, since I revealed a debt, it's still there and collectible. I thought you were going to work on the page, at least Lisa has left notes that you were. Thanks again, Al chained 19:41 1 Feb. MMX

Likewise: I saw your offer to help on Lisa's page and reported it on VFD (comments) before seeing you had made your offer just above. I interpreted Lisa's comments as a coded warning to let her have it to herself and not attempt any contemporaneous clean-up this time. Once bitten, twice shy. (What's your excuse?) Actually, your effusive praise for my Ozzy review has already paid any debt. (Not like that will always work....) Spıke ¬  19:58 1-Feb-10

Attempt to VFD delete Category:Musicians Who Suck So Monumentally That It Really, Truly Amazes Me That The Earth And Any Surrounding Planets And Quite Possibly A Good Bit Of The Afterlife Have Not Yet Been Swallowed Entirely[edit | edit source]

“Delete that category and you shall have me to answer to.”

~ Ozymandiaz

Have just done so (nominated it, at least) and saw your comment two minutes later in preparing a comment in the current nomination that I had raised the issue last week in another VFD nomination. I bare my neck and hope you will understand to just give a play bite. Why in hell shouldn't at least the name of the said Category be changed to something useful? Spıke ¬  01:19 5-Jan-10

Guess what! You now do! (joke) With all respect Spike, humour's not supposed to be useful. That's what makes it useful. --Ozymandiaz 16:37, January 5, 2010 (UTC)

But categories are. Let's see how the vote goes; you are getting some support there. Spıke ¬  16:44 5-Jan-10

Thanks but I disagree with you on the subject of categories. If categories were serious, they'd stand out glaringly on otherwise humorous articles. --Ozymandiaz 14:46, January 6, 2010 (UTC)

Categories should be useful, not unfunny. Have you seen my comment to your Keep in VFD that there should be some middle ground that doesn't go on for three lines? Keep is winning, 6-4, at the moment; and even the horrible {{N00blet}} is surviving. I don't mind losing votes; this stuff deserves to be looked at. Spıke ¬  15:26 6-Jan-10

Thank you for being reasonable. I suppose I should say something funny now. I LIKE PIE! --Ozymandiaz 15:26, January 7, 2010 (UTC)

I suppose that puts us on the same team! I do more than LIKE PIE. I fixed Pie. Have a piece. Spıke ¬  18:03 7-Jan-10

Why thank you, don't mind if I do. --Ozymandiaz 14:49, January 9, 2010 (UTC)

Well, I guess I should be buying the first round of e-pints down the e-pub! Spıke ¬  22:01 9-Jan-10

Oh please, allow me. I'm fabulously rich. --Ozymandiaz 02:37, January 10, 2010 (UTC)

Part copied here from his talk page

Nagging[edit | edit source]

How to change your vote on VFD[edit | edit source]

When you change a vote on VFD, or anywhere else for that matter, you're encouraged to strike out the original vote as opposed to moving it. That way it's a little clearer as to what you're doing. Just thought I'd let you know before somebody gives you a lashing. ;) -OptyC Sucks! Icons-flag-us.png CUN23:46, 15 Jan

Think I should go back and further clarify? Spıke ¬  23:59 15-Jan-10
It probably doesn't matter, I just wanted to let you know for future reference. -OptyC Sucks! Icons-flag-us.png CUN00:01, 16 Jan

Archive[edit | edit source]

ArchiveArchiveArchiveArchiveArchiveArchive. sausage lol 23:31, January 11, 2010 (UTC)

Could be worse. Could be Spang. Spıke ¬  23:35 11-Jan-10

Ducks ducks ducks[edit | edit source]

SPIKE, would you mind wading through this guy's contribs and figuring out just what his fixation with ducks is, and how much of his stuff is VFD-worthy? If you don't want to, that's fine, I'll come back to it later. At least if I put it here, I won't forget. But I just finished some maintenance so I don't have the patience for it right now. --Pleb SYNDROME CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!) 08:06, January 3, 2010 (UTC)

A contributor from Ballyduck, Northern Ireland, where either "ducks" is the local theme, or maybe he's a duck hunter? Or he registered, did a search for Ballyduck then perhaps Bally Duck, and found a set of articles in which to ply his trade? His trade is off-color but not "fixated," except on excreta, categories, and Scots. First thing that jumps out is that he hasn't contributed in almost two years. So he doesn't care what you put on VFD. I don't mind either, but it doesn't look as though he has much you could call "his stuff." Hope that answers the question.
On a related note, I read a message last night from PotatoSmut on Talk:White Folks criticizing the replacement intro illustration, sympathized with him, then found he had planted a paragraph in the article with Aryan/Nazi/Jew overtones much too unsubtle for the context, now reverted. And a few days ago I followed Zarosh as he visited page after page and edited the intro to plant a personal value judgment in each. There is no accounting for taste! (Now what am I, a shrink?) Spıke ¬  09:17 3-Jan-10

Yes. But if they were on VFD, would you vote to delete? Regarding {{crap}}: It was really popular in 05/06, but in its VFD discussion it was decided to keep the template for nostalgic value but ban it from being used on the mainspace, to discourage people from making excuses for their articles. Going through the pages that link to {{crap}} and fixing them or VFDing them is something I mean to do but keep forgetting, like checking if anyone is in Category:Users needing help. --Pleb SYNDROME CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!) 02:06, January 5, 2010 (UTC)

In fact, Category:Users needing help is on my watch list. I started helping users for the selfish reason of clearing out the list so that my own {{help}} request would be heard by someone in the know. You have not missed anything; no one has sent up a flare in about two months.
Duckistan: Mild Delete. The maps are cute, but the only humor in Section 1 is to write a history and transform it by using a lot of words that have "duck" in them. On the other hand, that's what Disney and Hanna-Barbera do on Saturday-morning TV. Section 2 is null; Section 3 is encyclopedia clichés ("never truly been agreed on") to vamp because you have nothing to say.
Duckism: Delete--More of the same, isn't it?
Articles in userspace: Abstain.
These articles are an alternate universe whose only real notability is that there are a lot of them and they are interrelated. Kind of like Hajime Socialist Republic et al. But they aren't horrible, nor even as bad as the Hajime set. Are you on a vendetta for which you need my backing prior to a key battle?! Spıke ¬  02:26 5-Jan-10 post-edited

Testicles[edit | edit source]

I actually have nothing else worthwhile to say, and nowhere else that I felt like saying it. I was explaining to my 12 year old how a vasectomy works the other day - how there is a tube from the testes to the penis that delivers the seminal fluid. I explained that what they do is cut out a small piece of it by cutting open your scrotum and snipping the tube and tying the ends up. I also explained that it was a tiny piece and that you'd think it made no change at all, but in reality it was a vast difference. My son asked me to stop talking. Pup

And...I can help you with this?
Explaining by way of having had one? by way of suggesting that he get one? ...? Spıke ¬  14:14 28-Jan-10
Oh, I see; you have just visited the Forum and dropped a load there criticizing the silly-assed debate I started (or instigated perhaps, in the case of Spang's upheaval). Bottom line, Spang gave me what I wanted--local-override power--which I am now using, and so can have no opinion on whether Courier versus Blackletter should be displayed on someone else's screen.
And you are either here to say, "Nothing personal"--or as a form of payback! Spıke ¬  14:33 28-Jan-10

No. I looked at my watch and thought "I haven't done anything on uncyc in 24 hours. I might visit Spike and be random." and while I was here I saw the link to the forum (of which my serious input was actually on Spang's talk page) and read through it and thought "Hmmm, storm in a teacup. Time for more random thoughts." I have no real concern about the template as I just didn't really like it so I chose not to use it. I can code well but I think of myself as a writer first, so spend more time getting my own writing right and ignore wiki wide issues like this unless they really bug me. Pup

I too am a writer first but used to like to come home at night and write code. These days, everything is pretty much done and the closest I come is tweaking fonts and style sheets. I plead guilty to spending inordinate time doing just what I did before but trying to make it prettier; that seems to be an epidemic in the computer biz. Spıke ¬  21:41 28-Jan-10

You're talking to the guy who hasn't written a complete new article for the last month as I've been busy with one article/game which is a single joke article with minimal text but one that I've spent a huge amount of time on to make it look pretty. I'm not a coder by profession, but I grew up with a programmer as a father, have a programmer/networker as one brother and a CAD expert as the other and I've done an unfortunately large amount of stuff for my professional life with coding and CAD work as well, and had a little study in networking and coding. C++ is still (mostly) greek to me, but html and vba I feel right at home with. I used to spend a fair bit of time while I was in the contact centre for a bank working on a sudoku generator/solver in excel while I was talking to people about their home loans. Actually had it working fairly well too before I left that job - it would solve most sudokus by logic in a minute max, and if that failed it have a brute force solver that would get whatever ones that it missed. Of course the problem with brute force solvers is that if given the right complication it would take a few hours to get through one, and I was focused on getting down to seconds. I might even get back to that project one day, but there are already a few of these available on the market so it could potentially be a bit of a waste of time. Pup

The replacement VFD article Plectrum is my latest, and partly autobiographical. Spıke ¬  23:34 28-Jan-10

Penis and related vandalism[edit | edit source]

Thanks for the catch on the Hathaway page, would have been a strange ending if anyone read that far from the main page. The way I revert is to minor edit from the last usuable page on the history, and I did that so don't know how it kept the last graph. Glad you found it, appreciated. Al 00:18 13 Feb. MMX

You're welcome. As I mentioned on User talk:MrN9000, I had been watching Penis after moving text there from Penis sword prior to its deletion on VFD. I got to Anne Hathaway by following the vandal's Contributions. I diffed all his changes, then diffed again to the present to see that y'all had missed one. If I were meticulous, I would follow him all the way back into history and probably delete everything he's ever done. Spıke ¬  00:24 13-Feb-10
So you have been watching Penis again eh SPIKE? MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 01:26, Feb 13
Well, it's been on my Watch list ever since the delete of Penis sword (now its Section 5). So when that vandal did his work, well, the Penis just popped up. As it were. Spıke ¬  01:44 13-Feb-10
PS--Again from your talk page, that long list of euphemisms (Section 6.2) frustrates me no less than "Peruvian slang" must have frustrated other people. Someone's desire to collect in one place all the possible names for the penis has the same motivation. I like the pix, but they live on elsewhere. I would like to castrate it. Spıke ¬  02:03 13-Feb-10

Anastasia[edit | edit source]

Hi Spike, saw your comments on Anastasia. The article is a stub but I am aware of the story, the supposed Anna Anderson connection (medically disproved in later years) etc. Not sure where to work in the humour on this one. This offers a different challenge. --Laurels.gifRomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 07:28, February 15, 2010 (UTC)

Did you also see that our collaboration on The Great Teletubby War is over for the moment unless one of us should change his name to Sysop? Roman Dog Bird super-protected it against continuing vandalism. Spıke ¬  11:06 15-Feb-10
We must have offended a lot of teletubby fans! I don't have anything to add to it so best leave it protected for now. --Laurels.gifRomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 11:39, February 15, 2010 (UTC)

Good catch[edit | edit source]

Some people say that I should pay attention. Those people are jerks. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 04:06, February 17, 2010 (UTC)

You must be talking about User Armynavy123. There is only one reason I noticed your typo: because he went on from inserting that very incisive unsigned comment in the forum to Barack Obama, where he prepended the "Satan Approves" template to this heavily debated and subtle article--now reverted. Spıke ¬  04:20 17-Feb-10

He's a noob. You know what they say about noobs and templates. On the plus side, while he did add a quote to a page, he was un-noobish enough to go back and undo it. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 04:36, February 17, 2010 (UTC)

Yikes! does he even use toilet paper? I went in and wiped up after him this time. Spıke ¬  04:43 17-Feb-10

Naw. He ate some dangerously undercooked chicken. On a side note, I cooked a chicken. Under. Dangerously. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 04:50, February 17, 2010 (UTC)

Oooh! Chicken tartare! That belongs in the Forum. Spıke ¬  12:27 17-Feb-10

Unsignpost 18 Feb 2010 stuff[edit | edit source]

On my comment to MrN that Unsignpost "honored" a notorious vandal

Hey. I saw your comments on MrN's page and thought it better to come here to explain the rationale etc. As to giving credit to vandals, it was one of the things I took deeply into consideration before penning that piece, and was one of the reasons why I let MrN, UU, and RDB, and anyone who reads their user-pages, or anyone who reads the unsignpost press room know what I was planning to do. One of my motivators here was that yes - ILP managed to get his 15 minutes, but his reward was an infinity ban, and in the way that this was written has managed to give himself a significant reputation as - to be blunt - a total moron. It also ties in with the Darwin award theme to the article previously. The use of the time frames involved show that if you are going to try something like this you have an extremely short window before you find yourself on the wrong end of a ban boot.

There are a significant number of cases similar to him before who haven't been used as an illustration like this though, and that I wouldn't use, for a very simple reason. ILP was, by the estimation of more than a few, simply a stupid kid who could barely work his way out of a paper bag. His short lived spree was due to ignorance of nettiquette rather than any real intention to vandalise. The damage he did was minor, and extremely unlikely to be repeated. Many of these vandals though are more destructive. One such example who I won't name - for the exact same rationale - created half a dozen sock puppets and was here for a few months being more insidious and destructive as time went on before finally it clicked that user a, b, c, d, and e were all the same person.

I hope this helps clear it all up. It isn't likely to be a repeated thing in any way at all. I'm glad that you felt it significant enough to be brought up. Although just as a future thing UU is generally the ubermind behind UnSignpost, and the author of a particular article generally will sign it. And I may possibly write more in the future on this, but that is also unlikely - this was simply to give UU a little breathing room at this stage of Mrs UU's incubation of an alien lifeform. Pup 03:59, 20/02/2010

I appreciate the clarification, but again, the tone of my post on Mr.N.'s talk page far overstates my concern. It's like, Mr.N. and I had this conversation (regarding the same vandal you mention) where he says, "No, son, all dogs have four legs." So this newbie sees a three-legged dog and says, "Well, lookie there." Indeed, I was shocked at the counterexample--that any vandal be rewarded by seeing himself named in the House Organ--but I am not concerned that nobody else is concerned, nor least of all that there are not rules set in stone against such a thing. It was an observation and never a formal complaint; after all, I have not mortgaged the house to pay the tuition here and am not entitled to any particular level of satisfaction. Also, it's conceivable that, never having met any of you or any of the vandals in question, I don't always deal with X with the proper context for X. Spıke ¬  04:14 20-Feb-10
No fuss. I just thought it better to get the clarification and the understanding of the rationale. It's like the old adage regarding rules - It's i before e except after c - but don't tell your neighbours. (And that would have read a lot better if your browser settings didn't kill the italics and bold.) Pup 05:39, 20/02/2010
Get off my talk page you pesky kids! Hang on. This is not my talk page. WAIT! Who stole my slippers? MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 00:13, Feb 25

Grapes of wroth[edit | edit source]

Your odd archiving makes it very hard to despoil your page in classic Uncyc style. Nominally Humane! some time 00:55, 3/03/2010

"Despoil"? Do you mean "descry"? Or did you wish to plunder my talk page?
If you are really trying to find something in an archive, just ask. ... Spıke ¬  01:01 3-Mar-10

Actually I was being cryptic because I don't like the word grapes. I'll have a look. Nominally Humane! some time 01:08, 3/03/2010

“The Dean waxes wroth? Then let Roth wax the Dean!”

I am modifying your contributions because, as I mentioned on your or Spang's talk page once, every time a GIF occurs in a paragraph of prose without a hard return, WikiMedia fails to enclose the paragraph in <P>, and for some reason such paragraphs are rendered here in very tiny type. Spıke ¬  01:12 3-Mar-10

rest of conversation on User:SPIKE/UnNews

Camera Obscura UnCleara[edit | edit source]

Hi. I was reading over the comments on the camera obscura nom and read yours again, and wondered if you ever went back to look at the page after it was edited, subtly edited (I love the last line on the page, and the birthday picture one). As you can see I have no trouble whoring for this one, and with a couple of vote its sooo close to feature. Anyway, please take a second look and see if those edits were enough to quall your concerns, or if more are needed. Going into my Hurt Locker now. Al in Hurt Locker :46 9.3.mmx

I did go back to it and saw that my concerns were resolved. I hate to not do you a favor, as you have done me many recently, but I've never voted for honors and merit badges, virtually never go to Page One (having an Uncyclopedia search bar instead), and only vote at VFD in order to snatch articles for reconstruction. I was prowling around VFH that day merely because Zim nominated one of my UnNews stories.
Speaking of reconstruction, White van is done and lots of fun, but Batroc is going to be a problem. I've gone to Wikipedia and to the external links on the page. I can do a copy-edit, and several people voted Keep because they also found it funny, but there is not much else to say about the guy. Spıke ¬ 02:28 9-Mar-10
Enough to say that your concerns were resolved, thanks. I wish I was a Batroc fan, but I don't know if I've ever even read a comic with him in it. There's probably some kind of backstory on he character. But maybe the page, with just a bit of clean up, is fine, given that many of us had some laughs reading it. The large pic works well on the page to set the mood. I'll read White Van, if fact, right now. Al 2:36 9.3.mmx Got some laughs out of me. Should probably be on the Crimes template, if its not already there.

[Hoax entry on VFD][edit | edit source]

Fuck off. I'll amuse myself in whichever way I see fit. If you have a problem with it, go ahead and take it up with an admin. In the meantime, please don't hesitate to take your "serious business" attitude and blow it out your ass. -OptyC Sucks! Icons-flag-us.png CUN16:12, 10 Mar

Didn't Mordillo already sex everyone apart on this one? Let's move on, I brought nachos for just such an occasion. --ChiefjusticePS3 16:16, March 10, 2010 (UTC)
Symbol delete vote.svg Serious < Hitler The Man In Black. 22:31, March 10, 2010 (UTC)

Child Obesity[edit | edit source]

I believe you were the one who posted a startling and unfriendly deletion notice on my page. Although you did hurt my feelings and cause me to sob uncontrollably in front of my family, I just want to know why you think it should be deleted.

You should sign your posts, Thatblondguy. Chers Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 00:37, March 25, 2010 (UTC)
It took me a long time to see that the above are two messages, rather than a prank from you. Indentation finally saved me from accusing you of tipping the absinthe earlier than I popped the top on my oil can of Labatt's. I've responded on his talk page. Bottom line, the VFD and the tag were a courtesy to Rifting, who rescinded his nomination thinking there were 20 active VFD votes. I actually voted to keep Thatblondguy's article. Spıke ¬ 00:49 25-Mar-10

Baha'i[edit | edit source]

I read your Bahai article, which was pretty funny, although not nearly as insulting as mine. Are you or were you a Bahai? I was until I discovered no God. chers! Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 13:49, April 7, 2010 (UTC)

Nope. There is a Baha'i commune up in Newmarket, which in the '90s produced a world-fusion musical group called Do'a. (This is a "call to prayer." The band changed its name to Do'ah after being overtaken by, and confused with, the altogether different Dead On Arrival (DOA).) The subject of Baha'i has come up in political discussions since then, as a way forward for Muslims. My detailed knowledge of Baha'i comes from reading Wikipedia for an hour. Spıke ¬ 14:27 7-Apr-10

Interesting. I've listened to Do'a, and found them pretty good. At that stage in my listening career, I found them derivative of Paul Winter Consort. In that form of music I like Oregon and the various musicians who've collaborated with them. Oregon's Music Of Another Present Era was my introduction to that stuff, and continues to be my standard of measurement. Thus I found Do'a to be nice, but lacking. "Muslim Lite" is an apt and hilarious description of the Bahai World Faith.. Rats off to ya! Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 15:56, April 7, 2010 (UTC)

Their music may be lacking, but it delivers one thing I need in music: memorable and innovative musical themes. Sometimes the flute solos are a little too Nice for me.
PS--Do comment on the "protest" at UnNews talk:Style. Mordillo wrapped this debate up (forced it closed, actually), in view of the "protest" by two writers, without addressing the underlying questions: (1) Do we all even need to style our articles the same way? and (2) Are there significant problems with your preferences on bolding/italics? My own opinions are on the page. Spıke ¬ 16:04 7-Apr-10
I'm doing this now. I think you may have ruffled Mordillos feathers because he got the impression that you can be imposing, when in fact you're being constructive. Being "chesty" doesn't go over well here, so if anybody catches a whiff of it, real or imagined, they may speak up. I happen to be amused by the idea that you may be plotting a takeover. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 16:44, April 7, 2010 (UTC)

QVFD[edit | edit source]

Hi Spike, just a quick tip: when popping your userspace pages on QVFD after moving the articles to mainspace, don't forget to use the {{redirect}} template, or lazy, incompetent admins like me might end up deleting the mainspace page we're redirected to by accident. And then you have to ask for it back, and we have to restore it, and it's more work than anyone wanted all around! In conclusion: brush your teeth, and stay in school. Toodles! --UU - natter UU Manhole.gif 12:53, Apr 9

Right you are. It had been so long since I moved these files to their final destinations that I didn't think (and didn't look!) that these were redirects. Spıke ¬ 12:57 9-Apr-10

And on VFD: don't list articles that are on ICU, especially ones that expire that day. ICU'd articles get checked by the admins, and most (including that one) will get deleted when their tag expires, or shortly afterwards. Putting that article on VFD extends its life unnecessarily, takes up a slot on the queue (OK, it's not full at the moment, but it may be) and wastes the time of everyone who votes on it, as it was going to be deleted again. Cheers! --UU - natter UU Manhole.gif 13:04, Apr 9

So many violations, so little time! Dexter bitched me out on this one on VFD. Thanks. Spıke ¬ 13:06 9-Apr-10

HHhaarrraannggmMM (Mac OS start-up sound)[edit | edit source]

Spike! Dude! I know nothing about making audio. But I have an article that needs the actual audio. Can you make an audio of MAC OS start up sound for HHhaarrraannggmMM and add to the page? Please.. Cheers--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 21:10, Apr 8

I could. Except I don't have a Mac and I don't know what sound it makes on start-up. Better than record it, find someone with a Mac and get the media file from it. Spıke ¬ 21:16 8-Apr-10

Spike! I have a Mac - but I can't record it and start it at the same time. But if I use a recorder on my iphone to record the start-up and send you by email, can you use that? You're the best person for Audio I know. I don't have a clue about how to put it. I don't even know what "kitten huffing" means. Really! Cheers!--Funnybony.--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 22:32, Apr 8

I don't know how to get a sound to play when you bring up an article (PuppyOnTheRadio might). I can convert WAV to MP3 and can edit WAV to clean it up. I cannot receive any such large files by e-mail; better to upload it to Uncyclopedia and point me to it. I don't know what you want me to do with it. If the iPhone can produce an audio file, why can't you just use that file straight? Spıke ¬ 22:52 8-Apr-10

Hi Spike, well I recorded it and uploaded as MP3 as File:Mac-startup.mp3 It just needs to be added as a button to play below the Mac picture at HHhaarrraannggmMM, where it says, "* This is the sound that an Apple Computer makes on startup." (below the pic). Could you link it so people can choose to play it? Same like your news stories. But just one. Much appreciated if possible. Cheers!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 19:09, Apr 9

Dude! I have the link on the File:Mac-startup.mp3 at HHhaarrraannggmMM but it won't play because I seem to have the code wrong. It plays in the arvhines page at File:Mac-startup.mp3
Could you work some magic and get it working?Dude!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 19:42, Apr 9

It plays for me--a simple organ chord. It identifies itself as a 0:05 audio, 44100 Hz (CD-quality) but monaural. It has no ID3 information on author, album, etc., as you would expect.

(1) Read UnNews:UnNewsAudio#How to listen regarding necessary local settings. (2) What happens when you click on one of the entries in the UnNews Audio most-recent list? If it doesn't play either, then you have issues on your end. (If it does, then I have just humped one of my recent performances. I know you won't mind.) Spıke ¬ 20:25 9-Apr-10

Spike! Thanks for getting that sound to sound. Much appreciated. I have no idea how you went from file to media format? But I believe it! Cheers!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 17:20, Apr 10

Um, I went from File: to Media: by editing File: and typing in Media:. Right there, in the section heading. Now, I hate to be the one to break this to you, but except for the article's title, which is the word by which you refer to the sound, there is no humor in this article. Why don't you tell us what the sound was originally? and how Apple came to pick it for a start-up sound? I suspect it has something to do with the riots outside your house right now. Spıke ¬ 21:55 10-Apr-10

iPad[edit | edit source]

Hi Spike, just got back from Frisco. iPad was sold out everywhere, but we did a freeze-ass downtown early morning stand-in-line deal to get one for my kid. Its way better than I expected, and with WiFi it's a total computer. Awesome resolution, and cool kicks way over-board gizmo. Like a thin book, and with 10 solid hours long battery life. Have you seen? Hope you've been well, dude!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 17:40, May 5 17:40, May 5, 2010 (UTC)

I'll stick with my 7-year-old Toshiba Portégé [sic]. Its battery life is good too, because it has a second battery where the CD player belongs. And a camera memory chip where the hard disk belongs. You type an article on yours, and I'll type one on mine, and I'll get there first.
Your VFH of the iPad article went nowhere, as did a VFH nomination I got more recently. UnNews simply gets stale before a consensus can assemble. And, as Skinfan noted, UnNewses are banged out faster than real articles--and with scrounged photos. Spıke ¬ 18:08 5-May-10

VFD; Aleister's edits; "tag-team whoring"?[edit | edit source]

I was the one who wrote all of the new text, not someone else. So the reference mentioned was written by me without anyone's knowledge (writing to try to save a page), and although it did reference their work it still was correct in the historical context of the use. And maybe we shouldn't out people's identities, even if they have mentioned their identity before on the site on talk pages. You can, of course, make up for your mistake by nomming the page. That would be a hoot, aye. Aleister 18:05 4 7

You say in the vote on the article in VFD that The Misunderstood, relative to The Beatles, are "relevant in context." Only inasmuch as SPIKE is relevant to Jesus Christ in both of us having two ears. In fact, it is self-promotion, and I saw that it was self-promotion by proxy rather than first-hand before I made my comment. I don't care whether Funnybony is using this article to hump his former stardom, or humping you off-line to do it.
Likewise, you understand that the rules against self-nomination for FA are there to prevent endless self-promotion--and ask me to promote you instead, as a repayment of some favor I am to imagine I owe you. This is exactly the problem with the FA process--magnified during competitions to bang out articles under the constraint of time--that I complain about nearby. Articles get FA not from quality but from a quality campaign of promotion by proxy.
Thanks to you, the article is not merely a sound effect, but a sound effect with three paragraphs of "explanation." That solved the problem, and I withdrew my vote to delete, but it doesn't merit honors. Spıke ¬ 20:27 5-Jul-10
Well, you woke up on the wrong side of the hornet's nest this morning. Grumbledi dumble. No, I popped the reference in myself, FB has never asked me to promote him or his history. I thought it was funny because his band was at the start of the psychdelic rock era, which did promote mushrooms and pot to corrupt the youth. That's the context I meant. And the feature-it comment was just a joke (look around, where are we? Uncy!) I didn't expect you to feature it. And you owe me no favors, I don't know where that came from. And the FA process is why you should vote there, you seldom do, and I would like to be judged by you when my pages are put up. You at least give reasons why, many people just cut then run without explanation. So grumbily grumpster, grump des grump, g. Aleister 22:19 5 7
Grumpy or not, we all love our resident SPIKE. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 03:49, July 6, 2010 (UTC)

Thank you for the armchair psychology. You say, "you owe me no favors, I don't know where that came from." Where it came from is: "You can...make up for your mistake by nomming the page." Yes this is a comedy site, but I would not have imagined that this was a request not to nom the page. My mood is not the problem; or, my dislike for popularity contests and tag-team whoring is not a mood. Spıke ¬ 12:43 6-Jul-10

El Niño[edit | edit source]

While I don't disagree with your raionale, the user who made those edits was a n00b, and you may want to address it directly on his talk-page rather then revert and not talk. I suggested that he start to work on El Nino, and I'd rather he learn from the experience by constructive criticism. After all, I applauded the work of n00b on white folks after I'd gone through substantial work to clean up the worst of the cruft while still retaining the original feel, and could have quite as easily gone in and reverted a new user without so much as a welcome to the neighbourhood myself. Nominally Humane! some time Monday, 13:22, Apr 12 2010 UTC

All right. 13:29 PS--Have now done so. I see on his talk page that you suggested that the article needs improvement; what sorts, please? Spıke ¬ 13:38 12-Apr-10
Hard to say. I usually write to try and get things to the point of featurability, and this isn't. I can't put my finger on how to get it there, but it has a good solid base, but needs polishing. I have looked at it a few times and then walked away again, which is why I was wondering if another perspective on it would help. (It didn't, but it was worth the shot.) Nominally Humane! some time Monday, 22:04, Apr 12 2010 UTC

That was really real stuff falsely blamed on El Nino... Oh... Sorry. HurricaneMa§ter 22:53, April 12, 2010 (UTC)

To be clear, the list is a bunch of happens-all-the-time-in-Latin-America things, and no one really blames it on El Niño except the demented writer of the encyclopedia article. It's just that your addition pulled it in the direction of goofy stuff that doesn't really happen. That's what broke the joke. Spıke ¬ 23:30 12-Apr-10
I don't know about that - escalation is one of the techniques that is covered in HTBFANJS, and escalation from the mundane to the ridiculous can be an effective tool. It didn't work in this case, but it could work. Nominally Humane! some time Monday, 23:56, Apr 12 2010 UTC

Cover, Rolling Stone[edit | edit source]

A genie left something in the vicinity of the article's talk page. Tweekable to get into the vicinity. Fuckin' genie now wants to be let out of her salt shaker for three hours just to take in a movie. Damn unions. Aleister 22:38 22 6 MMX

Question[edit | edit source]

Do you only go on VFD because thats the only time I see you.--If you're 555 then I'm Number of the Beast.jpg Talk What's it like to be a heretic? 03:42, July 1, 2010 (UTC)

I started in mainspace. VFD and UnNews are my usual haunts now. See my user page for an explanation, and for mainspace stuff I've done; see User:SPIKE/UnNews for my news and audio contributions. Spıke ¬ 03:46 1-Jul-10
Ok I see--If you're 555 then I'm Number of the Beast.jpg Talk What's it like to be a heretic? 04:01, July 1, 2010 (UTC)

Formatting of UN:VFD[edit | edit source]

I've kept away from VFD this week after my earlier boob. Though the help page says it's just like VFH, that isn't true as there as there is no drop down menu to register a vote. I think as it is, the page is still too easy to muck up , ok..for me to muck up..! Is it possible this can be fixed or is that some mega hard thing to do? --Laurels.gifRomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 11:02, July 23, 2010 (UTC)

It's too hard for me. I have learned Mediawiki syntax, and even to repair VFD tables, such as one recently where someone (not you) deleted the |comments= line, throwing someone's comment into one of the voting boxes. I have not learned enough to write widgets and toys.
The help page has not been updated to reflect the numbered-list voting format. The only thing I can say is, don't delete anything when you vote except the previous vote total you are going to increment. Also be aware that if you ever select any text (by holding down SHIFT as you move the cursor), the selected text will be deleted by something as simple as typing a visible character. Spıke ¬ 19:45 23-Jul-10

You stole my signature style, didn't you?[edit | edit source]

Don't worry, it is mere curiosity, and not homicidal fury, that prompts me to ask this, and your family will certainly have all of their limbs if you answer in the affirmative. Ж Kalir, Wandering Hippie Salesman 04:36, August 3, 2010 (UTC)

Who you? Welcome or welcome back! My use of gold-on-blue generally predates your arrival on Uncyc and might predate your arrival on Earth. Other than that, User:SPIKE/signature explains itself. Spıke ¬ 09:48 3-Aug-10

Tomb photo[edit | edit source]

Spike, do you remember a few months ago a VFD page that was just one big pic of a tomb monument. Indoors, somewhere in Europe. I could use that for my Tombstone page instead of the Winkler pic, do you recall what it was and where it would be? Thanks. Al 22:55 10 8

Yes, a verbatim spork from a foreign-language Uncyclopedia, with a foreign-language caption. Was it Ataturk? Spıke ¬ 23:05 10-Aug-10
Was deleted (before you could slap a Category on the photo! hah!). See Uncyclopedia:Pages for deletion/archive206#Mustafa Kemal Atatürk--maybe you can get it from the foreign wiki or by Restore by an Admin here. Spıke ¬ 23:10 10-Aug-10

Thanks! You found it, although it's gone. I'll ask the first admin I see walking down the street. Aleister 23:16 10 8

p.s. And weird it was deleted, four save votes to six delete. I wonder how that decision was made.

Weighting of the votes, based on the quality of their arguments, as provided for in the Rules. (If I do say so myself.) Spıke ¬ 23:22 10-Aug-10
Ah, so you robbed the site of that page with your fine rhetoric. Can I then call you a Tomb robber? heeheehee ha ha haAl 23:24 10 8

Tomb robber tomb robber (fingers pointed at the tomb robber)[edit | edit source]

In response to my comment on my nomination for the August Foolitzer

Ask and you shall receive. I'd forgotten to nom you, but also wanted to give you time to do some more of those things you do. Al 22:14 11 8

More than seven? Okay, I did an eighth for August tonight, UnNews:All crises end, unfortunately, just for you, in response to gathering reports on the news wire, all of the form, "Never mind." Spıke ¬ 01:02 12-Aug-10
Or, as Zim would put it, "Keep whoring yourself (meaning myself) and you shall receive." Thanks for the nomination. Spıke ¬ 01:03 12-Aug-10
Did I put it that way? I forget Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 16:02, August 13, 2010 (UTC)

How to upload/cross-load images[edit | edit source]

Just saw the uploaded Wikipedia image. I am a moron when it comes to loading images. How do you take the image and move it to here? Seriously, I've never uploaded an image and can't figure out how it's picked up and where to put it. The upload page just has a space to list something, and no matter what I've tried, never works. Can you help an ignorant man? Just a couple sentences on how you copied the image, and put it into the upload file. Thanks. Al 22:03 13 8

(Which Wikipedia image?) I have never done so but have always first downloaded the image to my PC. When you click the Browse button or try to type into the text box, a directory window pops up and you point to, or type the name of, an image on your PC. Then fill out the fields; especially, describe the image using every word someone might type searching for it--and, of course, add categories. Spıke ¬ 22:16 13-Aug-10
PS--To download, go to Wikipedia, right-click on the image and specify Save Image As. Spıke ¬ 22:17 13-Aug-10

Thanks, I'll play with it, esp. the P.S. The image just a few minutes ago. And I don't understand what you mean by adding categories? Is this commonly done here? So, one more question. To download an image to my PC, how would I then find it again? I've never done that. Does it go into a large file? These will be my last questions on this, as your time is money and power, and I will leave you to bask in the light of both. Thanks again. Al 22:29 13 8

Who is this? Is this really Aleister, who has turned every VFD discussion in the last week toward the need to categorize photos, quicker than a Tea Party member turns every discussion to how we need a Constitutional amendment that only a recent graduate of a state university is able to draft? Or are you just cracking wise?
When you surf to the external site and right-click on the image and ask to Save it, you'll get a comparable directory window with a list of files. A pull-down tab lets you vary the space you're looking at. As the file will only temporarily live on your PC during its journey to Uncyclopedia, it doesn't matter where you put it, so long as you remember when going to Special:Upload. "My Desktop" and "My Documents" are likely places. I plug in an SD chip and have it go there. If you put it on "My Desktop," it will stick out like a sore thumb after you close your browser, and you'll remember to delete the intermediate copy.
So what are you doing, sitting on Special:RecentChanges and watching me write tomorrow's news? Spıke ¬ 22:53 13-Aug-10
Thanks, that should help. I'll try it soon. And yep, it's me, and as a card carrying member of the Tea Party I insist that foreigner you call your President show us his birth certificate, or at least that cute footprint they have on file and then that he takes his socks off at a news conference to compare his feet with the print. And no, I'm not watching you create a page about my fellow tea-partier, that woman who said some kind of N-word. Off to run. Al 22:57 13 8

HowTo:Join ITSCON[edit | edit source]

This article, which I'm kinda qualified to compile, has been a million miles since you first saw the pile of material. And I never received more help here on any article than you gave me on that. And since then, it has been defanged without losing the sarcasms and absurd realities. It's featured HowTo right now this week. So RabbiTechno likes it. Do you think it has a chance on VFH, in current revised form? That was always our intention to make it work. Stay well.--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 18:45, Sep 14

  1. As you avoid the Forum, I avoid VFH and the Uncyclopedia main page. Needless drama; better off not caring.
  2. I don't like wisecracking with the Uncyclopedia navigational tools, including the names of things. I have always disapproved of your renaming of ISKCON to the fantasy ITSCON: No one searches for articles by the punch line. Similarly, an article on how to join ITSCON is of interest to no one, because only after reading it and understanding the joke does anyone know what ITSCON is. Spıke ¬ 19:13 14-Sep-10

Okay, Spike. As usual, through out this entire project, I take your advice. I changed the word ITSCON to ISKCON as you said, and changed the All-attractive (a translation of Sanskrit) into Harry, a Roman transliteration. So now it is all correct. Except for the title. After its off being featured on HowTo next week I'll figure out how to change the name to HowTo:Join ISKCON - without creating a double redirect. I think I have to ask somebody. Do you know? Thanks as always. Cheers!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 16:34, Sep 15

Or even HowTo:Join the Hare Krishna movement--requires less inside knowledge to understand, and screams out, "Nineties" better than anything except my beloved term "Negro." Use the move tab to change the article's name. All references to the article under the old name still work because they go through the redirect that was created. At the left, under toolbox, click "What links here" and change each reference from the old name to the new name. This eliminates "double redirects"--the case that someone clicking on a link will force Uncyclopedia to perform two hops. Then go to UN:QVFD and list {{redirect|old name}} so admins will delete the redirect that was created. Spıke ¬ 17:01 15-Sep-10
Thanks, Spike. Amazing Socky made the change just from noticing. It also redirects from ISKCON and ITSCON, is that okay? I don't want to delete the redirect from HowTo:Join ITSCON (old name) because its featured on HowTo right now - as the NEW version, that is. Cheers!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 18:58, Sep 15

Mars Bar[edit | edit source]

Have made a couple of amendments to the above article, and believe there is room for improvement here and that indeed the said article should have another chance at survival rather than deleting it out of hand. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

That is a damned fine lead paragraph and the vote is running against deleting the article out of hand. But you haven't done anything about the creator's truly awful concept of taking the list of ingredients and forcing humor or puns out of them. Keep working.... Spıke ¬ 00:12 19-Sep-10

User:SPIKE#Saves off VFD: you F***!NG bastard![edit | edit source]

This is such a good idea that I'm now gonna have to go back in time to get my shott all fixed up. After I fail at the UN:IC thing it's totally time to make this into the new user group de jour! That is all. f@<ker  Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~ Xkey280.jpg ~  30 Sep 2010 ~ 01:39 (UTC)

I am sure that I get the Save for Xylophone, as my contribution was writing whereas Aleister's was deleting. Apart from that, what the F@<K are you talking about??? Spıke ¬ 01:55 30-Sep-10

Oh I just think that keeping track of articles you've saved from VFD is brilliant. It never even occurred to me until I was going through your user page awhile ago. (Can't people share the credit...? Hm,m,m,m,m,m....)  Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~ Xkey280.jpg ~  30 Sep 2010 ~ 02:08 (UTC)

Yes, although I did enlarge the interesting xylophone pic to a larger size, which, if I may say so myselfs, makes the page. Anyway, what I've come for. Have you noticed that no admin has been on the site for well over an hour, and although the bad edits aren't overwhelming they are adding up. And no new feature. Where have all the admins gone, long time passing. Aleister 1:09 8 10
I had not noticed. I don't track admins nor the home page nor, usually, RecentChanges. I did change the water today on the UnNews Front Page. Go fish. Spıke ¬ 01:23 8-Oct-10
Yeah, I tend to ride recent changes and try to catch some of the IP's as they put in bad edits. Some of the users who were real good at that have left lately, and the old timey admins haven't been around much either. Even the people who changed UnNews seem to have drifted. Life goes on. Aleister 1:25 8 10
Then cheers to you for doing some of this scut-work that keeps the site going. Spıke ¬ 01:37 8-Oct-10
Oh, ah, thanks, but wasn't fishing for a compliment, which is the best time to get one I guess. Some of the people who've done that, especially Dexter, and Ethine, and Froggy, have drifted off for a couple of weeks now. HELPME and paizuri and others left awhile back. Hopefully the first group is not a related exodus but who knows. Aleister 1:42 8 10
Did they say to where, or for how long? I ain't going anywhere--but nor am I volunteering for any management role (even if this is a clandestine goal of all your nominations!). The last section chief I befriended found his management would not back him up when necessary. Spıke ¬ 01:49 8-Oct-10
(I do that too sometimes, but only if the IP edits are real bad.)  Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~ Xkey280.jpg ~  08 Oct 2010 ~ 01:54 (UTC)
Dunno where or how long. No, I've never had a clandestine purpose for noms or almost anything else. I make it a point in my life not to hint, or manipulate. Every nom or vote for your has been based on your work and value here. As for management, yikes! Would never wish that on anyone. Shudders. Aleister 2:32 8 10
Except in a slip of the tongue during a vote on VFD! Jeez! But you're right, it is getting mighty quiet around here. Fortunately, I brought a camera to Tuesday's match and finished a project. Spıke ¬ 23:17 8-Oct-10
Damned quiet. All I had overnight was I.P. Anon appending thats not true to a sentence which, of course, was not true. Maybe I'm banned and changes to my Watchlist are being blocked. Spıke ¬ 14:55 9-Oct-10
Maybe everyone else got banned and... um... whatever my point was. Or something. ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101009 - 15:06 (UTC)

Aleister adjusts the vote count on UotM and I revert him[edit | edit source]

I missed Lyth's qualifier. And was just adding for's, including the banned vandal. That was pretty nice though, an old fashioned kind of niceness, that vandal's vote. Aleister 23:19 13 10

Yes, it was chivalry worthy of medieval times. On the other hand, vandalism ought to be met with shunning, no matter what a refined Knave the vandal turns out to be; no less than the one once honored in UnSignpost. Now, whether an Anon is allowed to vote for the mensch who undid the damage he himself caused is a legality on which I have no guideposts. Spıke ¬ 23:23 13-Oct-10

In this case no, because he is banned and he admitted who he was. So a banner can't be a voter, like the felony law in the States, or in some of the States. Aleister 23:31 13 10

And deft, to boot, to cast votes for honors just before his ban took effect! Spıke ¬ 00:07 14-Oct-10
Oh, it was before? ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101014 - 01:02 (UTC)

Nah, it was a close but different IP number. Maybe a different computer, or a rotating number or he can change it at will. Probably a school computer, that's where I'd put my guess if I had just one. He did admit it was him though. Aleister 1:05 14 10

Myes... well. Okau. Good enough for me... I'll throw cucumbers at it if it comes back, I will! ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101014 - 01:10 (UTC)
Cute! he burns out Library Computer #3 for future access to Uncyclopedia, slides over to #4, and no one is the wiser. Spıke ¬ 01:11 14-Oct-10
And Magicman's trying to get it to make an account... it still shouldn't get a vote. *emits aura of spite* ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101014 - 01:13 (UTC)
As above, vandalism ought to be met with shunning. I understand that we were on college campuses this summer recruiting new Uncyclopedians; but, although this guy has mastered HTML and local style rules, nothing during his spree convinces me he'd be an asset. Spıke ¬ 01:22 14-Oct-10

Well, on Magic Man's talk page he was able to put words together in a literate sentence or two. That is a leg up nowadays. And he did do several unusual things--promised to not vandalize anymore, voted for his rival in the fight, and was polite and actually friendly, which Magic Man wants to be. So possibly an unusual case, so maybe we can sit back and stay tuned for developments. Aleister 1:45 14 10

Interesting. But there's no indication he can be funny. "BTW I vote for you at the user of the month, I don't know if I can but who cares." My money says he is not a native English speaker. Spıke ¬ 01:48 14-Oct-10
My spite would like to butt in and point out that the specimen made a huge mess of the wiki. My spite would also like to flail a bit; clearly this is a major issue to it. ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101014 - 01:50 (UTC)

ROFLOLKMFITA "I don't know if I can but who cares" Outrageous! It's as if Oscar Wilde himself said it. Could he be Adam Sandler or someone? Well, seriously, maybe he'd join and play awhile at chasing down vandals and code work (those orange stripes were pretty impressive) if he doesn't write. nuff for now, signing off soon. Enjoy. Aleister 1:53 14 10

Lemon cakes!  Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~ Xkey280.jpg ~  14 Oct 2010 ~ 05:14 (UTC)
My bet is that he would write articles of the genre, "I don't know if it's funny but who cares." Spıke ¬ 11:10 14-Oct-10

Mars Climate Orbiter[edit | edit source]

I obviously skipped the word "don't" in the first sentence below

'lo. I don't understand why we don't get edit conflicted on this. Do you? We were doing edits at the same time and in-between each other. Oh well. And I guess I care about this page because I'm a space geek, or a spaced geek, and remember having high hopes for this mission and then the damn thing fell apart because of two differing forms of measurement. It was so stupid, and a loss, but forgotten now because of the great Martian mission successes since. The best one is to be launched not too far away, a very large new rover (or is it a huge stationary station, one of the two, but major). Aleister 17:14 14 10

Because we edit and think at different rates of speed, and often edit, think, and edit again, so it isn't exactly ping pong. Communicating by Change Summary is awful but effective. As always, I am weaving in my premise that any government agency always tries to dress up any project in view of fads, crises, and popularity. As I said in the Change Summary, I'm not wedded to "Kryptonite" at all. The meaning I wanted was that the "Climate Orbiter" was a mission to Mars that no one would want to pay for, so it was renamed "Climate." Spıke ¬ 17:17 14-Oct-10

Still don't get it. Some, but a huh? on my end, but that's fine. On the editing, usually if I start to edit a page and someone else posts an edit after I start I get an edit conflict, and have to play with copy-paste. We worked over each other, at least the timeline looks like it. But maybe I'm misreading the time line. Have you ever looked at Enterprisemission.com, run by Richard Hoaglund? A semi-nut but he comes up with some interesting if not always accurate theories and discoveries, and I'm thinking in particular of the mars "fossil" he found in an early Rover photograph that is compelling and under-publicized. Oh, and com. in edit summaries is quicker than this, but more constrictive in the amount of words we can use. Aleister 17:23 14 10

Every edition of every Uncyclopedia page has a unique number. When you press Save page, if the edition number your edit is based on is not the number of the current edition, you get an edit conflict. In other words, you get an edit conflict because sometimes, but not always, there was an edit conflict: I, like you, had begun after the most recent change to the page, and I had pressed Save page after you pressed edit and before you pressed Save page. Spıke ¬ 17:28 14-Oct-10

Thanks. It's like baseball, but without the foul lines. Gotta go again, fun playing with you. Al 17:31 14 10

Likewise! And, no, I have not read Hoaglund, but I have read Feynman; as well as how he got to the bottom of the O-ring failure, on the commission studying the Challenger explosion, he asserts that NASA devised a "safety factor" for Shuttle flights that was based on political acceptability and manufactured a computation that would have that as the result. Am not particularly down on NASA, but do delight in writing about government using science as a PR tool. Spıke ¬ 17:46 14-Oct-10

You're amazing.[edit | edit source]

That is all. ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101017 - 15:03 (UTC)

You have been defending me all over the place recently and I appreciate it! However, it would be helpful to know exactly what amazed you this time. That way, I can keep doing it or (depending on the nature of your amazement) stop doing it. Spıke ¬ 15:23 17-Oct-10
I must have actually noticed you recently. It happens sometimes when I pay attention; don't get used to it.
This time, I think it was VFD-related. Isn't it always VFD related? Sure seems like it, since I generally avoid UnNews like a plague... do you do anything else? Ah, yes, definitely VFD-related. *beams* ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101017 - 16:22 (UTC)

Encyclopedia Dramatica[edit | edit source]

Uncyclopedia is much nicer then ED. --Uncyclomancer 11:16, October 21, 2010 (UTC)

I wouldn't know about ED--but, welcome! Spıke ¬ 11:21 21-Oct-10

ED is vile and horrible, don't type in Offended (oh, dear, now that I have typed that your going to...), Goatse or anything for that matter as it re-directs to Goatse. --Uncyclomancer 15:33, October 21, 2010 (UTC)

No, the more I check out the various Brand X's, the happier I am to remain here at the Mother Ship. And all I know about Goatse is that he has sockpuppets, he leaves messages on other people's pages, and they don't seem to like it. Spıke ¬ 15:42 21-Oct-10

You know, I like sockpuppet culture. I have a sockpuppet: User:Black Tubbie. --Uncyclomancer 10:20, October 22, 2010 (UTC)

"The nice thing about schizophrenia is that you're never alone." Spıke ¬ 10:27 22-Oct-10

Congratulations[edit | edit source]

Uncyclopedian of the Month Award Uncyclopedian of the Month October 2010

You deserve it, keep up the good work. --ChiefjusticePS3 07:16, November 1, 2010 (UTC)

Yay, g'job, SPIKE! Congratulations. ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101101 - 07:20 (UTC)

Your username, bis[edit | edit source]

So I heard that you want User:Spike as your username. But, wouldn't User:Spıke be a good compromise instead? Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 01:34, 7 November 2010

Bit hard to type, that. ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101107 - 01:38 (UTC)
That's why we've got something called copypasta! Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 01:42, 7 November 2010
Screen shot.gif
Actually, what I'm doing now is a satisfactory compromise, except that it induces people to shout my name. Spıke ¬ 01:42 7-Nov-10
The difference is just a dot on the i, and since you're already using it as your username in your sig, I thought you'd be interested. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 01:46, 7 November 2010
I rarely type my own username--except via tildes. But I'll decline the creative suggestion, as my entire Uncyclopedia screen uses 256-character custom fonts that don't include iota. Spıke ¬ 02:12 7-Nov-10
So... there's already a iota in your sig, but your entire Uncyclopedia screen uses fonts that don't include it... Alright, now I'm as confused as Lyrithya. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 02:20, 7 November 2010
That is an utterance I hope I never make! But Firefox switches from Spik2009 12pt to Palatino 10pt to render that single character, and it doesn't look right. Spıke ¬ 02:28 7-Nov-10
Aww. ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101107 - 02:32 (UTC)

Kent Hovind[edit | edit source]

Is this an improvement over this? I can't tell. ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101107 - 02:00 (UTC)

He cleaned up the awful quotes and trimmed the categories. The writing is a little better, but it's an obscene rant, overtly designed to discredit the guy rather than make fun of him. The subject is a "creation scientist" ([sic], if you like), and this editor's first order of business is to refute his creed, which, pardon the pun, is preaching to the choir; also, not what we're here for. The editor needs gentle guidance before (or at the same time as) being rolled back.
Am having the same problem with Badmaas. He visited Pakistan and put a rasher of edits on his talk page, relying on me to turn them into good and funny English. I got him to move it to his userspace and am helping him, a little, but it's still essentially a rant about all the foreign nations that "backstabbed" Pakistan. Spıke ¬ 02:12 7-Nov-10

Why are so many people so incompetent? *flails* ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101107 - 02:19 (UTC)

Sigh! incompetence we can work with. Setting out to use Uncyclopedia to grind a personal axe means the guy might not even want to work with you. Spıke ¬ 02:37 7-Nov-10

I don't work with anyone. Haven't you noticed? ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101107 - 02:50 (UTC)

The Grue Army[edit | edit source]

Hey SPIKE, Meganew and I were wondering, if you would like to join the grue army. If so just write back here or on my talk page and Meganew or I will add you. You can click all the links at the top of that page to read all about us. Or go here. --Wanna see a magic trick? 02:13, November 16, 2010 (UTC)


Sorry to but in here but will you join the grue army or not? --Wanna see a magic trick? 02:49, November 16, 2010 (UTC)
Sorry to respond. I'm not a joiner. I will work with you against vandals whenever I can. Spıke ¬ 03:07 16-Nov-10
Hmm... I see.... Well if you ever change your mind just tell me. --Wanna see a magic trick? 03:08, November 16, 2010 (UTC)