User talk:Zim ulator

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“Relationships are like Lego blocks; the more fur, the faster Hawking radiation is emitted.”

~ Psychopathes on keeping your woman in the kitchen
Enjoy with a splash of rum and a twist, and a plate of bat-wrapped pork brains in milk gravy.

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The Right and Left Honourable Reverend Major Sir Zim_ulator KUN EGA PC FP WotM HA is pleased to welcome you to his humble talk page.


User:Zim ulator/UnNews:Small god climbs into percolator, makes great coffee[edit source]

You will have followed on VFD, a week later on VFD, and now on VFH, my assertions that UnNews:I sneezed was not about news, and did not read like news. The above submission, now mercy-moved to your userspace, reminds me that at least that other UnNews had a theme. No sentence of your UnNews relates to any other sentence--nor to the photo, which I like. Would you please keep working on this to try to make it say anything, about anything. Spıke ¬ 01:53 25-Jan-11

UnSignpost! Wheeee![edit source]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 04:41, 27 January 2011 IT will need to me an article in the futureAimsplode 15:36, January 28, 2011 (UTC)

UnNews:Former Senate candidate O'Donnell under investigation[edit source]

I found you a source for this, though it highlights that the story is a month after the fact. In fact, if O'Donnell is in prison already, the entire story might be moot.

Apart from the photo, this story hits my personal hot button at being too close to reality. The story's stock in trade is ridicule; and she was defeated for election by a campaign of very similar ridicule. It's hard to tell if you want us to laugh or you want her to lose--except, again, the story is way late. Spıke ¬ 17:21 28-Jan-11

I should have fired you when I had the power. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 17:56, January 28, 2011 (UTC)
You can still set him on fire, you know. Never rule that out. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 18:08, 28 January 2011
I have something infinitely more sinister planned for Spike... something to do with bats, no doubt. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 00:22, January 29, 2011 (UTC)

Translation, you are going to submit another deliberately incoherent article "for Spike," that is, to troll me. Just as Froggy says on his talk page that he reserves the right to violate any style rule if it gives him a chuckle. I give up. Good night. Spıke ¬ 01:00 29-Jan-11

Not at all! Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 01:03, January 29, 2011 (UTC)

Spike, I'm pretty sure what Zim's thinking of doesn't involve UnNews, just bats... perhaps nibbling you to death, or something. Unless it's an UnNews involving that, but he already wrote one of those, so it doesn't seem that likely. *eyes zim ulator suspiciously* 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 01:08, 29 January 2011

Bats are eating my legs! Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 01:14, January 29, 2011 (UTC)
I didn't say it. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 01:29, 29 January 2011

Banning Aimsplode[edit source]

Hooray for the ban! Look at his Contributions and virtually none are on content. However, Lyrithya and I debate what the effect (of various things) might be on his future behavior, on Mordillo's talk page. Spıke ¬ 17:59 28-Jan-11

I think I was pretty nice, giving him such a short ban. I will be less nice if he continues. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 18:01, January 28, 2011 (UTC)

On this transaction, I don't care about how nice or un-nice you are. Continuing discussions on Mordillo's and Zombiebaron's pages, the point is that a lot of our new, young users are coming here to chat and/or to have someone pay attention to them. A ban, even one that they are begging for, explicitly ask for, or richly deserved--especially when accompanied by a scolding--means that an Admin is paying attention to them. For a problem child, this is rich reward. Whether or not you want them to go away and write content, or just go away, the ban renders it less likely. Spıke ¬ 23:39 28-Jan-11

Uh... okay... Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 23:48, January 28, 2011 (UTC)
What did I do?? (literally, im not being sarcastic))Aimsplode 20:39, January 29, 2011 (UTC)
The specific offense I banned you for was your comment here. I have also heard rumblings about you from others. Consider yourself paroled, and please behave yourself. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 20:56, January 29, 2011 (UTC)

Sources[edit source]

The deal with Froggy is that he had a joke Source and I changed it to {{Original}}, because the story was original. (I also moved his UnNews to eliminate excess capital letters, and that stands, so this isn't some sort of drama-fest.) This is Section 4.5 of UnNews:Style, Don't crack wise with the sources. It's not being "inflexible" to put an article in our style--as I did with yours, because you don't remember our new rule not to put names in bold. (That would be in your Pendaflex file under "dickery.") Spıke ¬ 23:39 28-Jan-11

Froggy notwithstanding, it seems I should reread UnNews docs. I used to use joke sources a lot. I didn't think it's dickery at all. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 23:47, January 28, 2011 (UTC)

No, no, by "dickery" I meant the drama over the change away from boldfacing.

Oh, that dickery. I wasn't clear. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 00:03, January 29, 2011 (UTC)

RecentUnNews[edit source]

In other very recent news, I've changed the format of {{RecentUnNews}} by inventing {{RecentUnNewsItem}}. It works in the case in which any Audio is identically named to the story; otherwise, it has to be spelled out as before. Oh, and I got the Forum to agree that, despite deviating from the appearance of the Wikipedia main page, the entire line in {{RecentUnNews}} should be a link to the story and we should not expect the reader to know to click on the bold link, as opposed to the other links, which will send him to an article instead of the news. This is in Forum:Vote: Format of RecentUnNews. At the moment, {{RecentUnNews}} is up-to-date. Spıke ¬ 23:58 28-Jan-11

You're wrong.[edit source]

About something. I forgot what. I was going to say this before, when I remembered, but then I forgot to. Oops.

I haven't been wrong since Mao Tse Tung ate a bagel and liked it. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 16:20, January 31, 2011 (UTC)

In completely unrelated news, could you please put this: {{User:Lyrithya/Nothing/logo}} on your userpage? Pleeease? *kitty eyes* 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 20:00, 30 January 2011

What does Spike think?[edit source]

I thought... this might amuse you. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 20:45, January 29, 2011 (UTC)

What do you think of this? Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 21:24, January 30, 2011 (UTC)

I think it is a red-link. As for the first, why are you creating user pages for other people? Are they sockpuppets? Are you like the guy in Babylon 5 who has a "cabinet" of skulls to talk to him? Spıke ¬ 22:12 30-Jan-11
Spike, don't you create userpages for folks when you move stuff into their userspaces? Although these seemed more... hells, I dunno. Zim, making the red links go away, or something? 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 22:20, 30 January 2011

Fine, Spike, I screwed up a link... be that way. I wanted you to read Real American housewives make for TV gold in my catbox and tell me if you think it's suitable for UnNews.

You can do two things with it: (1) Make it a column, with a defined point-of-view--perhaps Ebert, whom PF4Eva always brings to UnNews; perhaps even ask him for more ideas. This is what you'll probably end up doing, because more than half the humor is not the facts but the reporter's reaction and opinion. Or (2) really try to make it straight news, in which case you must pull it out of the first person and kill the final paragraph, which is cheerleading.
In either case, don't lead with the reporter/columnist confessing that he doesn't know what he's talking about. Don't start an UnNews by screaming, This isn't worthy of your consideration! You tell the same joke in the 6th paragraph; move all that material there. And footnotes are a parody of Wikipedia. You are going to parody either a news article or a column, and these writing styles don't have them. So pack all the humor in-line. Spıke ¬ 00:29 31-Jan-11

Thanks for your input. I will read later after I get some sleep. Cheers! Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 03:01, January 31, 2011 (UTC)

Placeholder user pages[edit source]

As Lyrithya has correctly surmised, I put placeholder stuff on some user pages so as to remove red links here. I also fixed the French flag icon link. And yes, I am like the insane emperor with the skulls. Lyrithya, I need help with a graphic of me talking to the skulls of my dead enemies. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 00:00, January 31, 2011 (UTC)
Okay... what would you like to look like? 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 00:05, 31 January 2011
Maybe start with that weird pic of me on my user page, the one with all the black in it? Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 00:19, January 31, 2011 (UTC)
I may give it a prodder, then. But not now. Later. Now I need to finish these PLS entries... 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 00:22, 31 January 2011
That would be so cool!!! Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 00:27, January 31, 2011 (UTC)
What would Zim like to look like? Probably, young and handsome. HA HA HA HA HA HA Spıke ¬ 00:29 31-Jan-11
I could make you young and handsome, too... *hefts frying pan* 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 00:38, 31 January 2011
As long as you've got that, why don't you make me some Hamburger Vindaloo instead. Spıke ¬ 00:47 31-Jan-11
Cartagia.jpg
PS--Zim, neither Google nor Wikipedia is coughing up either names or images of the Babylon 5 character who talked to his shrunken-head buddies. I know I didn't dream it. Spıke ¬ 00:48 31-Jan-11
Cartagia, by any chance? And cooking takes effort. I could make some popcorn, though... 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 01:07, 31 January 2011
Does not; just add sauce from a bottle and keep stirring until the meat is non-lethal. Spıke ¬ 01:33 31-Jan-11
Well-recalled, Lyrithya, but this is the best image I could find. Zim, would it blow your cover if the Zimulatrix took a photo of you in such a setting? Spıke ¬ 01:35 31-Jan-11

Thank you both for your efforts. That pic is awesome. I have some pics of myself that many would not recognise as me, I may use one of those. Cheers! Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 01:46, January 31, 2011 (UTC)

Excellent... 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 01:53, 31 January 2011

Hmph.[edit source]

Your cascading protection is getting in the way of my finickiness. I hope your happy. But seriously, why do you need to protect this at all, let alone cascadingly? 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 05:27, 1 February 2011

Lolololol!!!! Aimsplode 00:47, February 2, 2011 (UTC) (XD)
Don't know what you're laughing about, Aimsplode. Don't really know what you're talking about either, Lyrithya. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 01:12, February 2, 2011 (UTC)
You protected that page cascadingly, and it interfered with an image I wanted to muck with. Subsequently, I had to come give you a hard time about it, or something.

And you definitely did not see me make a horrible typo, of course not. *shifty eyes* 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 01:20, 2 February 2011

Hm. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 01:28, February 2, 2011 (UTC)
Aren't you so glad you came back to Uncyclopedia? *shifty eyes* 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 01:42, 2 February 2011
Yes I am. Thank you sooo much!!!!! HTBFANJS SIDE NOTE: This is not funny. This may also cause your eyes to asplode. Read with caution, unless you already read it. Then you wouldn't be reading this, anyway. SO yay. Aimsplode 01:49, February 5, 2011 (UTC)

This is American People[edit source]

Or so I think. I'm pretty sure you spell "recognize" with a z, not a "s". (see above.) I don't really know what I'm laughing about either. It's the thought that counts, though. Aimsplode 01:17, February 2, 2011 (UTC)

Hm Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 01:29, February 2, 2011 (UTC)
You spell it with an "s," of course, if you are on the other side of the Atlantic, or for example writing an UnNews about Britain. What you are laughing about is the joy of baiting Zim. It is not a winning strategy. Spıke ¬ 01:51 2-Feb-11
Zim, {{Main headlines}} has been broken in a tiny, cosmetic way by last week's change of Mediawiki version: The dates on Recent News are now missing a space after the month name. I think it will suffice to insert a space after %DATE%, if you would please do it. The Front Page should come out with Recent News formatted as the list of Audios is. Spıke ¬ 01:55 2-Feb-11

This is snowed in[edit source]

Hi Zim! Are you snowed in? I expect to be. We got an injection from German UnNews today, along with a contribution from Putthatknifedown that I had to rework entirely, and finally a fun reworking of a totally obscure story on the part of Romartus. I'll be on the site for another 3 hours. Spıke ¬ 01:49 2-Feb-11

The UnSignpost is now served with complimentary tacos.[edit source]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 02:33, 3 February 2011

Protection request[edit source]

Would you mind doing Game:Alone in the dark/0/0/0, Game:Alone in the dark/Engine and Game:Alone in the dark/Frame for the next few days? Nominally Humane! some time 23:12, February 4, 2011 (UTC)

Is a week enough? I can change it, you didn't specify about sub-pages. Cheers! Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 02:40, February 5, 2011 (UTC)
Just for top 10, and the other pages aren't as sensitive, whereas these three make up 90% of the game. Nominally Humane! some time 04:16, February 5, 2011 (UTC)

NO[edit source]

No, you deserve congratulations sir(?). Because the UnFunnies are adequately better than my contributions. I's is in awe. -- Sheepicon.png 23:07, February 6, 2011 (UTC)

Thanks, that is very kind of you. I hope you enjoyed my slanderous blurb about you. Cheers! Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 23:15, February 6, 2011 (UTC)

Thank you[edit source]

For things inspecific, but also how generally supportive you've been, it's... proven rather invaluable, really. So thank you. And the cabinet with the heads sounds fine to me... they have a nice aura. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 18:54, 9 February 2011

Um, you're welcome, of course for whatever. Cheers, sweetie! Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 00:57, February 13, 2011 (UTC)

This edition of the UnSignpost brought to you in two's complement...[edit source]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 02:25, 10 February 2011

Lurg luuurg unsignpost luuuuurg[edit source]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 06:15, 17 February 2011

Damn straight[edit source]

I'm currently enjoying a pouch of cherry & vanilla flavoured tobacco and it's extremely delicious.--Holy shit it's Neopowell 13:21, February 18, 2011 (UTC)

Ew! I'll bet it smells nice, though. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 23:38, February 22, 2011 (UTC)

UnSignnull pointer exception[edit source]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 07:44, 24 February 2011

Thank you![edit source]

Seriousy, thanks very much for your vote on the Madison Movement page. I expected you to chime in on the against'ems, so you did surprise me (something that doesn't happen much, actually, long story). And I haven't finished up some of my pages on ?, and you just being you has reminded me of that. Thanks. Aleister 3:38 28-2-'11

You're welcome, of course. Dunno why I surprised you. I'm doing a little at ?pedia as well. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 04:21, February 28, 2011 (UTC)

Stonehenge Myspilleng[edit source]

After all the times I looked at this thing, how on earth did I miss seeing I had "Future stores" instead of "Future stories"? That is really embarrassing. Thanks very much for fixing my goof. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  05:25, February 28, 2011 (UTC)

Always a pleasure to pleasure you, dear sir. While I was at it, I took the liberty of dedicating this to your pet iguana. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 19:23, February 28, 2011 (UTC)

I'm almost afraid to ask...[edit source]

...but what's with all the images? Some grand design? 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 02:49, 1 March 2011

UnFunnies ammo. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 02:52, March 1, 2011 (UTC)
Okay, now I'm scared. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 02:59, 1 March 2011
Awesome... Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 03:02, March 1, 2011 (UTC)

All the UnSignpost you ever wanted[edit source]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 16:10, 3 March 2011

A thought, nothing more.[edit source]

"Who are you?"
"Batteries included."

Does your granddaughter know these? 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 16:45, 4 March 2011

Dunno. I'll have to wait to ask her, with her social calendar being so filled. Perhaps I will ask her on Saturday. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 18:26, March 4, 2011 (UTC)
You might well be interested in the whatnot for your own sake, for that matter. It's all quite erstwhile, after all. Do you know it? 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 18:36, 4 March 2011

I asked her today. "Who are you?" meant a game she saw watching iCarly. The her, "batteries included" means that there's batteries included with an action figure, or some other kind of toy. Am I any closer to solving this puzzle? Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 21:26, March 8, 2011 (UTC)

That depends. In what country is it? 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 11:19, 10 March 2011

UnSignpost: March 10th, 2011[edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 03:15, March 10, 2011 (UTC)

Greetings.[edit source]

It has come to my attention that you have recently voted for one or more of my articles on VFH. I don't recall what they were, and I don't know if the records are entirely accurate, so if you have received this message in error, you have my sincerest apologies.

Otherwise, thank you for your support in my quest to pretend that I am capable of writing. It is most appreciated.

This copy-pasted spam message is brought to you by: 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 07:03, 13 March 2011

AdminBots presents: The UnSignpost[edit source]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 05:14, 17 March 2011

UnSignpostOnTheDelivery[edit source]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 10:16, 24 March 2011

This is your UnSignpost speaking[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 02:13, 31 March 2011

Because everyone needs a giant image slapped on their talkpage at some point for no apparent reason...[edit source]

Zim thinking.svg

Sums up a few things, don't it? 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 18:57, 4 April 2011

Terribly creative UnSignpost header[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 04:25, 7 April 2011

The UnSignpost: On-time and on top of things... as always.[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 04:02, 14 April 2011

Jesus' Pieces[edit source]

On Irc the other night, I blurted out Jeese's Pieces when we were on a Jesii related topic, and decided to write such an article. Naturally I found your unnews article. I would like to incorporate your Jesus' Pieces universe into it. If you have already got something in mind, I am cool with whatever. Mine is very stubby at this point, ok not even stub worthy, an undictionary entry. I also have not read your article completely. But my concept is like in ET, but Jesus, leaves pieces out to tempt the ET like unbeliever into Christiness, or something. The Mars company name will play into that idea as well. But Let me know if you want to freehand me, or mother me on this. --K evilLips MUN,CM,NS,3of7 16:25, April 15, 2011 (UTC)

Since I died four days ago, you may do as you wish. Be forewarned, though; I shall probably be resurrected soon. I'll be watching... Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers

That UnSignposty thing[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 07:21, 21 April 2011

UnSignpost: April 28th, 2011[edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 06:33, April 28, 2011 (UTC)

Signpost Un[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 00:19, 5 May 2011

The Signpost is delivered to all God-fearing citizens[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 05:46, 12 May 2011

UnSignpost[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 00:10, 19 May 2011

Phnerb unsignpost[edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:24, May 26, 2011 (UTC)

The UnSignpost: Best before Friday![edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:21, June 2, 2011 (UTC)

Hurrah, it's the UnSignpost![edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:25, June 9, 2011 (UTC)

UnSignpost Activate![edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:23, June 16, 2011 (UTC)

Juice.[edit source]

Are you full of juice? 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 15:16, 18 June 2011

Yes, and jiggly too! Is that mustard on your poointy ears? Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 15:24, June 18, 2011 (UTC)
Mustard is glorious. But there's more barbecue sauce than mustard involved, I assure you. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 16:47, 18 June 2011

Catch it. Kill it. Bin it. It's the UnSignpost![edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:23, June 23, 2011 (UTC)

The Un-Sigh-npost![edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:25, June 30, 2011 (UTC)

It's free and it always will be; it's the UnSignpost![edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:21, July 7, 2011 (UTC)

The UnSignpost: Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger![edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:21, July 14, 2011 (UTC)

The UnSignpost: Avoid all contact with eyes.[edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:24, July 21, 2011 (UTC)

More class than 9000 schools: It's the UnSignpost![edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:24, July 28, 2011 (UTC)

ChiefjusticeDS is a lazy sod and has paid the ultimate price... an UnSignpost Coup[edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:21, August 6, 2011 (UTC)

More rubbish Australian Prose because ChiefjusticeDS got stabbed in the buttocks by a rioter with a felt-tip pen[edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:20, August 11, 2011 (UTC)

Now it only wants you gone; it's the UnSignpost![edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:23, August 18, 2011 (UTC)

Wonko tiddlybum-post[edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:21, August 25, 2011 (UTC)

Mailman's here! Lock up your daughters and horny middle-aged Wives![edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:21, September 1, 2011 (UTC)

This UnSignpost brought to you by... uh... fairy dust? Hmm, we seem to have run out of sponsors.[edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 01:22, September 8, 2011 (UTC)

The UnSignpost: Now with free bacon![edit source]

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:22, September 15, 2011 (UTC)

Brought to you by Lion Bars! It's the UnSignpost![edit source]

--ChiefjusticeXBox360 07:06, September 22, 2011 (UTC)

Hold onto your wage packets! It's the UnSignpost![edit source]

--Wanna see a magic trick? 01:21, September 29, 2011 (UTC)

A day late, because ChiefjusticeDS got lazy: The UnSignPost![edit source]

~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) Proudly bogan 02:35, October 7, 2011 (UTC)

Generic UnSignpost header[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 03:18, 27 October 2011

Generic UnSignpost header[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 02:06, 3 November 2011

Generic UnSignpost header[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 00:49, 10 November 2011

UnSignpost - 17 November 2011[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 00:28, 17 November 2011

UnSignpost - 24 November 2011[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 02:13, 24 November 2011

UnSignpost - 1 December 2011[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 05:15, 1 December 2011

UnSignpost - 8 December 2011[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 00:23, 8 December 2011

UnSignpost - 15 December 2011[edit source]

--ChiefjusticeXBox360 10:50, December 15, 2011 (UTC)

UnSignpost - 22 December 2011[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 03:52, 22 December 2011

UnSignpost - 29 December 2011[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 00:55, 29 December 2011

UnSignpost - January 5th, 2012[edit source]

Greetings[edit source]

I have gone through my records and it appears as though you may have voted for me for some award, supported one or more of my articles on VFH, or supported one or more of my images on VFP, in the past year or so. If this is not the case, then please ignore this message. Otherwise, thank you for your support. May you have a long and fruitful life, and have many parasites. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 18:57, 6 January 2012

UnSignpost - 12 January 2012[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 01:04, 12 January 2012

UnSignpost - 19 January 2012[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 15:07, 19 January 2012

UnSignpost - 26 January 2012[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 08:27, 26 January 2012

UnSignpost - 3 February 2012[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 03:12, 3 February 2012

UnSignpost - 10 February 2012[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 10:26, 10 February 2012

UnSignpost - 18 February 2012[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 07:57, 18 February 2012

UnSignpost - 23 February 2012[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 01:48, 23 February 2012

UnSignpost - 1 March 2012[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 00:25, 1 March 2012

UnSignpost - 8 March 2012[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 00:22, 8 March 2012

UnSignpost 5 April 2012[edit source]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 21:01, Apr 5

How dare you.[edit source]

HOW DARE YOU! ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-us.pngWed, Jun 13 '12 15:07 (UTC)

Joe Colton article deletion[edit source]

hi there, I have moved the article I created at General Joseph Brady Colton to General Joseph B. Colton and all that remains on that page is a redirect and since nothing links to the original page it should be deleted could you do this for me?

Added to QVFD Nominally Humane! 02:01 16 Aug

All this time ...[edit source]

You thought I was nothing but a troll. Well look at THIS! I created a feature article. I did it! Me! Me! Me! Who's poor and delusional now, old man? --Ozymandiaz

Leaving a comment like this suggests to me you haven't grown out of your short troll trousers yet. Also, don't use a sig when you haven't signed in properly. --Laurels.gifRomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 21:42, November 6, 2012 (UTC)

OK Zimmy[edit source]

So, our boy Spike gave me a one-month on the Wikia site. Very good. I wanted to chat with you just for fun and not to try to get you on this site, no matter what he thinks. I'm above such kindergarten intrigue in some serious way --- I don't care enough for any community to try actively to - well, the whole idea is just preposterously dim. Meet me on chat for a hello and a few laughs if you do happen on there. -- Style Oranssiviiva.jpg Guide 19:27, 19 May 2013 (UTC)

Evil[edit source]

Evil Jesus finally made it to the front page after bribes, threats, and curses galore. Your creation is like Frankenstein, just coming back for more throwing of the babies in the pond. Nice work! Aleister 12:42 1-6-14

link=:File:{{{image}}}

This person wrote an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Ain't they clever?!


I am flattened by all the fuss made over this little thing. I have a particular fondness for it. Thanks for blowing on the embers of my sputtering self respect. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 01:17, 3 June 2014 (UTC)

Holy shit[edit source]

You're here! You're queer! (I'm used to it!) EMC here by the way. I'm glad to see you're still alive and I hope all is well. I also hope you plan to stick around for reasons that only a love song can explain:
--EMC [TALK] 21:08 Jun 1 2014

Actually, it's my granddaughter who's queer, but I appreciate the sediment. Please accept my nipples as a down payment on all that nice stuff you're going to say about me. Cheers! Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 01:22, 3 June 2014 (UTC)


Seconded. – Llwy-ar-lawr (talkcontribslogs) 21:16, 1 Jun 2014Uncyclopedia is a community site that anyone can contribute to. Discover, share and add your knowledge! UncyclopediaUncyclopediaIllogicopediai:fr:LogimalpediePaudurapedyjaFrithchiclipeidUncapaediaAbsurdopediaScotypedia
Nominated. Good to see a friendly face Zim. JFC 23:28. Jun 2
Oh, you sweet kids! Thanks for saying such nice things about me, causing me to consider contributing an odd sphincter-twitch-inducing article in the future. Cheers! Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 01:22, 3 June 2014 (UTC)

Hello, Monsignor Peaches.[edit source]

I have finally arrived at this place, and I seek advice from you on how to be an Uncyclopedian.

Oh, right. I almost forgot. I am Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive, but I have chosen the username Tezcatlipoca.

It seems you haven't been here for a while, but I don't care. The reason I contact you right now is because I'm too scared to try to contact Athyria - I mean, Isarra. Maybe XY007 can help...

Oh shit what did I just do?! The god of darkness!? 02:38, 8 December 2015 (UTC)

Uncyclopedia does not forgive, nor forget. MyOwnBadSelf (talk) 02:55, 8 December 2015 (UTC)
I've been away since before the Infamous Split into two separate Uncyclopediae. It tested my ability to have fun at a site where internal politics is charged. Finally, the whiff of megalomania among some users bothered me enough to leave and to to Illogicopedia. There are some here who have an agenda, who want Uncyc to be a certain kind of thing. They pissed me off. In the early days, it was fun, but gradually dicks got away with being dicks, and so became bigger dicks, and so forth. So, I wish you well in your endeavors, but warn that you may encounter grand mal dickery. Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 13:41, 7 January 2016 (UTC)
He lives!!! -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

It's beginning to look a lot like…[edit source]

See you next year! The first annual *Kiss My Ass* Holiday Competition has officially ended for 2021

Santakitty.gif

Up for grabs is the coveted Clark Griswold Award for Holiday Cheer. Who will be crowned Holiday Victor?
Judgement day is upon ye!

Seasons Greetings!

It's that special time of year. A wonderful time for friends and family to rejoice in gaiety. Not you! You usually spend all of your hard-earned money on gifts for them, and now you just want to hibernate until your finances recuperate. Well, here at Uncyclopedia, entering our newest competition won't cost you a penny Sign Up Today! (pretty please)  – Zana Dark  talk to me  AJTA (ooh!) (aah!) ...·º•ø®@» LEG CUN GUN DUN 14:40, 13 December 2021

Why can't I log in? What's going on here? Ty.[edit source]

Hi, I seem to be having problems logging in. Are there two different Uncyclopedia accounts, is that the issue? Must I use two different UserNames? Must I use two different email addresses? Wth is going on? I AM able to log in into the Account #1. I am NOT able to log in into the Account #2. My main email address is: adamabein@hotmail.com My attempts to resent account #2 have been unsuccessful. Is it because I used a different e-mail address? We have so many damn email addresses-ugh! Or was this an issue with FandomWiki? Ugh.


Thx for your help.

Sincerely,

Smuggler. Or SMuggler#3. Or Smuggler3. or Adambein or adambein. Or 'Just shoot me in the head right now-all's I wanna do is write stupid news articles.' That works too.


Account #1?:

Smuggler 04:26, 9 October 2022 (UTC)


Account #2?:


https://uncyclopedia.com/wiki/User:Smuggler


There are indeed two different Uncyclopedias. This is the fork (uncyclopedia.co), the other is the spoon (uncyclopedia.com). It's a confusing mess, there have been attempts to re-unify, but it's never gotten anywhere. Microsoft for POTUS (talk) 04:48, 9 October 2022 (UTC)

Ahhh. Ok, so how do I reset my password to the one I can't log in to? Is there any way u can tell me to which email address the reset code is being sent? That'd be a start. Thx Zim. – Preceding unsigned comment added by Smuggler (talk • contribs)

You might want to ask the admins on the spoon for help regarding their wiki. We on the fork can´t really do anything to help. Alula.gifAlula.gif 10:23, 9 October 2022 (UTC)