User talk:Chukchi-language
Oh Dear...[edit source]
Hello, Chukchi-language, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Unfortunately, we've noticed that your contributions - not to put too fine a point on it - have been crap. Basically, we think you're a spammer/vandal/10-year-old. But don't despair! We have ways to make you talk.. ahem. I mean, there are ways to get you out of this mess.
- Beginner's Guide
- Our Vanity Policies - why we don't care about your friends
- If you're a vandal, this may be your wake up-call!
- How to be funny and not just stupid
If you read anything at all, make it the above four links. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, try these:
- About Uncyclopedia and The five pliers of Uncyclopedia
- How to get started editing on uncyclopedia
- Everything you ever wanted to know, but were afraid to ask
- Help Pages - if you need help with a specific issue
Good luck and I'm sorry you got off to such a bad start. I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button (
) above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.
If you need help or think this template has been placed unfairly, please ask me or an admin on their talk page, rather than going bat-fuck-insane. Alternatively you can ask at the Dump, or add the following: {{help}} to this page along with a message and someone will come along and help you if they can. Again, welcome! πππDaniPine3 (talk)πππ 20:34, 15 May 2025 (UTC)
Fake rules[edit source]
Wassup Chukchi-language?! Don't worry, DaniPine3's just a big nerd slightly above the rest of us. It's not easy to maintain unreverted edits on uncyclopedia. Here are some ground rules that I just pulled out of my ass:
- Don't remove or change stuff that's been there for a while.
- If there's an old page that you think you can change to make funny, think again. It's been there for so long that it's a classic. What will make you a more memorable user is to create new articles with new jokes. That's the fastest path to popularity.
- Don't add meaningless stuff.
- I tried this with TheStraightMan to make an article with just O I I A I I repeating. It didn't work. I also tried to make an article called dumb with only the word "dumb." in it. Didn't work. Huffed to the Stone Age.
- Accept advice from the mods.
- If they tell you to do something, do it. You don't want to be banned from Uncyclopedia. Keeping good favor with the mods is necessary. If they call your edits vandalism, it's vandalism, even if it's not. Obey orders!
- If they tell you to do something, do it. You don't want to be banned from Uncyclopedia. Keeping good favor with the mods is necessary. If they call your edits vandalism, it's vandalism, even if it's not.
This is an incomplete, foolish, stupid and biased list, but I hope it helps! Coffi (talk) 21:09, 15 May 2025 (UTC)
- Thanks! :) Chukchi-language (talk) 21:21, 15 May 2025 (UTC)
- hey, it's me, the big nerd. just wanted to let you know why I reverted your stuff. since you linked to some weird book, I thought you were one of those bots that were trying to promote something. it turns out I was wrong. sorry about that.
also Coffi is wrong about the whole "If they tell you to do something, do it". this isn't a dictatorship, and (most of the time) we're open to discussion. at least I want to abuse my power as little as possible, so don't think you'll be constantly pressed around here. although you should be beware if some admin has a bad day. πππDaniPine3 (talk)πππ 21:23, 15 May 2025 (UTC)- @DaniPine3 ah that makes sense, thanks for responding! basically my joke was that there is a (genuine) scientific paper called "Can Sex Improve Nasal Function?βAn Exploration of the Link Between Sex and Nasal Function", so i thought it would be funny to have an article about sex mainly focusing on that with legitimate references and nothing lewd. probably wasn't as funny as it seemed in my head haha! Chukchi-language (talk) 21:39, 15 May 2025 (UTC)
- hey, it's me, the big nerd. just wanted to let you know why I reverted your stuff. since you linked to some weird book, I thought you were one of those bots that were trying to promote something. it turns out I was wrong. sorry about that.
Userpage[edit source]
I just noticed that you don't have a userpage. Do you need help making a cool fancy nice one like mine?
Ahh, Vanity. Coffi (talk) 21:32, 15 May 2025 (UTC)
- sure sounds fun! Chukchi-language (talk) 21:39, 15 May 2025 (UTC)
- I must say, the Chukchi language is honestly one of the coolest fucking languages ever in my opinion. But maybe I just like cold things. Do you actually speak Chukchi? OαΓΆαααα
(vandalize my talk page) 21:41, 15 May 2025 (UTC)
- I sadly don't, though I may learn it one day as I'm interested in the languages of Siberia! Chukchi-language (talk) 21:45, 15 May 2025 (UTC)
- I must say, the Chukchi language is honestly one of the coolest fucking languages ever in my opinion. But maybe I just like cold things. Do you actually speak Chukchi? OαΓΆαααα
Also...[edit source]
If you want an editing experience that isn't reverted...
ποΈYOU HAVE BEEN DRAFTEDποΈ
into the elite forces of the
ASBOLAAT LITERARY LEGION
MISSION: Write a few glorious lines(following the rules, of course) to shape the fate of a chaotic epic.
Your words may doom the world, summon a new god, or just give WAR another heart attack.
π To enlist: go to The Grand ASBOLAAT Story and add ONE LINE to the end. Then, wait for your next turn, and write another.
π― Do NOT edit others' lines. Do NOT write a banana. Do NOT back away from KALKUTNIDAK.
π₯ Do it for glory. Do it for Coffi. Do it because KALKUTNIDAK must never win.
βοΈ JOIN THE STORY WAR βοΈ
Failure to comply will result in eternal narratological confusion.