User:Palladmial/The IT Crowd

“I quite enjoyed the bit with the musical in it.”
~ Oscar Wilde

The IT Crowd is a show about some company from some third-world country, going bankrupt thanks to its population of nerds. They live in the basement doing nerd stuff nobody cares about. CEO Denholm Reynholm saves the company by throwing a woman named Jen with them, satisfying the nerds' hungry craving for sex.

Douglas[edit | edit source]

It was a fine Tuesday morning at Denholm Industries. Denholm was celebrating Jen's fine handiwork when he was suddenly informed that Germany won the World Cup. He then threw himself out a window, which the audience found very hilarious. Still needing to finish their programme, the directors hired some guy off the street named Douglas and made him the new CEO. He used his new-found wealth to buy lots of porn and have sex with Jen.

A few weeks later, Douglas broke the Internet. Everyone had sex.

Yesterday's Jam -- A new employee named Jen is given to the nerds. She tries to escape, but she fails to escape. They have sex.
Calamity Jam -- Jen admits her shoe fetish. The nerds start a fire and steal an expensive machine. They have sex.
Fifty Bottles of Jam -- The nerds try to find more women to have sex with. Jen tries to find a new boyfriend, but the nerds steal Jen and have sex with her.
Red Jam -- Jen discovers a goth who the nerds were having sex with. He tries to take over the world, but he turns into a vampire somehow. Jen and the nerds have sex.
The Hunting of Something that is Not Quite Jam -- Jen turns into a ghost. She has ghost sex.
Aunt Irma Loves Jam -- Everyone engages in extended intradepartment communications and lengthy exchanges in copulatory ethics. Then they have sex.

Wrecked Doubting -- The nerds turn out to be gay, but they get better.
Douglas Jumps Out a Building and Dies -- Douglas jumps out a building and dies.
Moss Almost Gets Eaten by a German Cannibal -- The nerds learn a lesson about digital piracy.
I Wonder What's For Dinner? -- The directors realized this episode had accidentally been replaced with some bad porn flick where everyone sits around a table and makes bad jokes and forgets to take their clothes off and have sex. They apologize profusely, and promise to film more sex.
A Deep Metaphor -- Jen's bra is too hot. Only the nerds can soothe her aching muscles.
The Joy of Jam (and Sex) -- Douglas decides to have sex with Jen, but instead he has sex with the nerds.

Hello, Jam (Which Is Sex) -- Jen is worried that other people want to have sex with her. She goes paranoid.
We Are Not Men (But We Like Jam) -- The nerds join a gang and steal money.
We Like Tramps (and Jam and Sex) -- Everyone loses their jobs. But then they get them back.
The Peach Jam (and Sex) -- Jen finds out she can't write. The nerds humiliate her. This is the pinnacle of British humour.
Facebook -- Everyone gets addicted to the Internet.
Hey, Did You Guys Notice that When We Said Jam, We Actually Meant Sex? -- Everyone stops being depressed and has sex.