User:Kevillips/inthenews
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- Crystalline entity finds no hitch in domination of puny Earth FP
- Warren Buffett accused of scapegoating former hair stylist
- Study shows explosions are bad for both buildings and homes FP
- FBI closes in on PC zombie gang FP
- FDA Mandate actually a ruse by big tobacco
- Customs agreement leads to mini big bang FP
- Church Softens Stance on Gay Marriage
- McDonald's to join UN Trademark Skirmish
- Disney and Yum! Join Against Somali Pirates
- Carbon Friendly Cable Channel to Launch
- New Night Rider star to brush up on singing
- JIF Sues Wonka
- Trailer Park is on the move
- New Calendar Recognized
- Bachelor Ghetto
- Meat based humans proven
- Labor Leaders Cancel Protest censored by UN:VFD
- Siamese Twins Announce They're Gay
- New Orleans to Reopen Airport January 1 censored by UN:VFD
- Bingo Follows CSI for Attendence Bonanza
FP = Front page