User:Apollo1758/project80
Life of Pi is a novel about an Indian boy named Pi being stranded on a boat in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, with nothing but an aggressive Bengal Tiger who has recently gone on a killing spree. Pi, who is the incredibly smart Indian boy in your calculus class, must use his incredible trigonometry skills to navigate the largest ocean in the world using only the constellations in the sky and his hallucinations of Gandhi's sarcastic and annoyingly confusing advice. With no food, no water, and no clothes, Pi must survive for months without showering; that is, if he could avoid getting torn apart by the full-sized tiger right next to him! Will his stay on the lifeboat end in a gruesome and bloody death, accompanied by a violent struggle for life, or will his stay on the lifeboat end in a peaceful death with him drowning slowly and getting torn up by sharks?
Yann Martel got influence to write his novel by stalking one of his Indian neighbors and his children for two weeks, and writing down a list of Indian stereotypes he could include in his novel. Yann Martel came up with the idea to write Life of Pi when he read Moby Dick, and decided, "Hey, I could write a sadistic novel about people getting stranded on a boat with a huge, aggressive animal, and have close family members of the main character die in it also."
There is a version of this novel translated by a starving Indian boy woking at a call center into British English, and also a badly translated version of the novel to French.
Pi's Life[edit | edit source]
Pi was born to a family of 22 children, 7 of which were boys. He grew up in the small town of Vedapureeswarar Salihtya, located in the French influenced region of Pondicherry. Since his parents owned a zoo, Pi became very fascinated in animals. Pi had even tried to have sex with a few of the goats, and started to try having sex with some other animals when he found out how satisfying it felt. When his father found out about his sexual relations with animals, he was terribly upset at first, but then he realized it was a good opportunity to teach Pi a "life lesson".
Pi's father took Pi aside and said to him, "Son, you have seen animals before, but now it is time for me to show you how dangerous animals can be!"
Pi's father led Pi to the tiger cage, where his father threw a goat into the tiger cage, and Pi was forced to watch the goat get gruesomely decapitated, and die of a slow, painful death. Pi's father then called Pi's brother, Ravi, over, saying it was time he also learn about the dangers of animals. Pi's father picked Ravi up by the arm and tossed him into the cage, and Pi watched his brother get bloodily torn up by the tiger even more easily than the goat.
After Pi's father fed Pi's brother to the tiger, his father said, "But remember, Pi, that the most dangerous animals of all is you. Humans are even more dangerous than the fiercest of tigers, and I hope you and Ravi learned a lesson. Now, who wants some apple pie?"
Because of that traumatic experience, Pi became mentally unstable, and was approaching the brink of insanity. Pi realized the only way to cure himself of his insanity was by joining religions as quickly as possible, with no regard for what the religion actually worships. The next morning, after drinking beer to make sure he is as delusional as possible, Pi traveled to the Kerala Synagogue, and self-declared himself to be Jewish after a weird man swinging a Star of David on a chain tried to convert him to Judaism. Shortly after, Pi went to the Kizhuri Mosque, and after a bearded man with a strapped on vest threatened to blow him up if he didn't become a Muslim, Pi joined Islam. Pi joined Christianity, Buddhism, and even invented his own religion, which he named Piscism. Pi's parents enrolled Pi into a mental institution shortly after they found out.
Characters in Pi's Life[edit | edit source]
Piscine Molitor Vasudev Wamantel Patel[edit | edit source]
Usually referred to as "Pi", he narrates the story from heaven after he gets torn up by the dangerous tiger and dies. Pi is emotionally confused, and his only friend in life is his imaginary friend Ramesh. Pi also has an imaginary girlfriend named Urvi. Pie is also a tasty desert, especially with ice cream and strawberries.
Richard Parker[edit | edit source]
Richard Parker is a scary, misnamed tiger who plots how to feast on Pi's body every day. Richard Parker uses Pi's body as a pillow when he falls to sleep, and treats Pi as his personal slave. Richard Parker growls at Pi if Pi forgets to give him his daily back massage, and Richard Parker roars at Pi if Pi even dares approach Richard Parker's irresistibly delicious shrimp cocktail. Richard Parker uses his long tail as a whip, and his intimidating appearance as an incentive for Pi to work.
Controversy of Pi's Life[edit | edit source]
Pi's life has been deemed illegitimate by Stephen Hawking because if a person could really exist and be affiliated with that much religions, then they would soon be killed by Jewish suicide bombers or by naked guys burning a cross in their lawn. Religious groups have declared that if Pi can't choose a single religion, then they'll force him to accept one by force. The Pope has issued an ultimatum that if Pi doesn't choose a religion in a week, then he will declare holy war on him.
Pi has also been criticized by animal rights groups for his maltreatment of animals. Pi has been charged with 314 counts of fish abuse, including a racially motivated slaughtering of the Black Sea Turtle. Pi has been charged with 109 counts of bird abuse for throwing huge rocks at pidgeons multiple times and calling the birds "damn rats with wings".
Still, others criticize Pi's life for being excessively boring and making them fall to sleep while they tried to read about it. A woman from Vancouver filed a lawsuit because she was reading the book while she was driving, and the book made her fall asleep and crash her car into the Excessively Sharp Jewelry Store.