User:Aaadddaaammm/Wrong

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“WROOOOOOOOOOOOONG!!!!!!!!!!!”

~ Lex Luthor on Wrong

The word "wrong" has a rich and diverse meaning and history, if that's right. No other word has had such an impact on so many people than this humble noun.

The Definition[edit | edit source]

Wrong, (and although this is not always accurate) is generally considered to be the opposite of right. There are several synonyms for wrong.

  • Republicans
  • George W Bush
  • John McCain
  • Democrats
  • Al Gore
  • Barack Obama
  • Your Mum
  • the guy you are arguing with
  • the way gay people have sex
  • Americans in general
  • Jami
  • Boyfriends named Robert who can't admit that they're really wrong so they attempt to publicly denounce their *CORRECT* girlfriends...unsuccessfully.

The Eight "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts"[edit | edit source]

While many people have many different detailed definitions of wrong, the most common and accurate is pretty much spelled out in The Eight "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts" left here by his noodly goodness, The Flying Spaghetti Monster, Creator of the Universe.

1) I'd really rather you didn't act like a sanctimonious holier-than-thou ass when describing my noodly goodness. If some people don't believe in me, that's okay. Really, I'm not that vain. Besides, this isn't about them so don't change the subject.

2) I'd really rather you didn't use my existence as a means to oppress, subjugate, punish, eviscerate, and/or, you know, be mean to others. I don't require sacrifices, and purity is for drinking water, not people.

3) I'd really rather you didn't judge people for the way they look, or how they dress, or the way they talk, or, well, just play nice, Okay? Oh, and get this into your thick heads: woman = person. man = person. Samey = Samey. One is not better than the other, unless we're talking about fashion and I'm sorry, but I gave that to women and some guys who know the difference between teal and fuchsia.

4) I'd really rather you didn't indulge in conduct that offends yourself, or your willing, consenting partner of legal age AND mental maturity. As for anyone who might object, I think the expression is go f*** yourself, unless they find that offensive in which case they can turn off the TV for once and go for a walk for a change.

5) I'd really rather you didn't challenge the bigoted, misogynistic, hateful ideas of others on an empty stomach. Eat, then go after the b*******.

6) I'd really rather you didn't build multi million-dollar churches/temples/mosques/shrines to my noodly goodness when the money could be better spent (take your pick): Ending poverty Curing diseases Living in peace, loving with passion, and lowering the cost of cable I might be a complex-carbohydrate omniscient being, but I enjoy the simple things in life. I ought to know. I AM the creator.

7) I'd really rather you didn't go around telling people I talk to you. You're not that interesting. Get over yourself. And I told you to love your fellow man, can't you take a hint?

8) I'd really rather you didn't do unto others as you would have them do unto you if you are into, um, stuff that uses a lot of leather/lubricant/Las Vegas. If the other person is into it, however (pursuant to #4), then have at it, take pictures, and for the love of Mike, wear a CONDOM! Honestly, it's a piece of rubber. If I didn't want it to feel good when you did it I would have added spikes, or something.

The letters[edit | edit source]

"Wrong" has 5 letters. A significant 180% of them are consonants, unless you count double-u as two vowels. This is somewhat unconventional, but in this case the word would have 7 letters, of which 60% would be consonants and 60% vowels. As well, although the first "wrong" in this sentence has an uppercase W, this need not always be the case. Capitalisation of the initial "w" in "wrong" is only necessary when it is at the beginning of a sentence, or in the rare case where it is used as a proper noun, such as when referring to the country "Wrong", or "my good friend, Wrong". Whilst some believe that it is not necessary to examine the particular characteristics of each letter in order to understand a word, it can't hurt, can it?

“WRONG! WRONG is 80% Consanant!!”

~ WRONG on How much consanant is in wrong.

Fine, fine.

“Wrong!”

W[edit | edit source]

The first letter in "wrong" has already been mentioned. It is a dub. This letter has the dubious honour of being the longest letter to say, spell and write. However, even after all this taxing effort invested in the "w", it is not even pronounced. In "wrong", the "w" is silent.

R[edit | edit source]

Robbed of its rightful place at the begginning of this word, "r" comes in a close second. "R" is infamous for its mispronounciation by those people of Asian descent. This leads to countless hilarious accent-based jokes, which are far too crude for a publication of this quality, so no Chinese jokes, or Korean jokes.... The Japanese are a different story. There's a Japanese joke below.

Japanese Joke[edit | edit source]

Three people - an Irishman, an Australian and a Ching-Chong-Japaneseman decide to go for a bush walk. They split the responsibility because they are all busy people. They decide that the Irishman will bring the tent, the Australian will bring the map, and the Jap will bring the supplies. [Oh shit I just realised this isn't to do with the old R/W accent. Ed.] Anyway, the Aussie turns up on the day of the tramp at the carpark. The Irishman is a bit late, but the Jap just doesn't turn up. After 1 hour of waiting, they decide to leave a note and go on without him. They are about 30 minutes into their walk when they hear this rustling in the bushes off to the side of the track. They stop in their tracks, because this is lion country. They slowly back away as the rustling comes closer. All of a sudden, the yellow fellow leaps out of the bushes and screams "Supplies!".

O[edit | edit source]

"O" is the third letter in the word "wrong". It is the only vowel in the word, hence it is lucky that it is located in the middle. As you can see, it is shaped like a circle. Sometimes it's not quite a circle; it is often depicted as an oval. It was one of the first letters to be created, and is shaped as it is as it is the shape your mouth makes when pronouncing it, and when experiencing an "O".

N[edit | edit source]

If I'm right, "N" is a particularly umimterestimg letter.

“Wrong!”

~ Wrong as usual

“You mean Wromg”

Im fact, mamy people forgo usimg this letter at all, am'd simply use the letter "M" im its place. This is usually fime as the two letters lie mext to each other im the alphabet, amd evem om the keyboard, amd are almost imdistimguishable from ome amother whem spokem. You might thimk that it would look comfusimg, but you would be wromg. However, "N" is still used by some popular artists, imcludimg mamy rappers. A word that uses the letter "N" rather tham simply substitutimg "M" is oftem referred to as "the N word."

G[edit | edit source]

"G" the final letter in the word "wrong". It is an unusual looking letter, in both its lower case (g), and upper case forms (G). The lower case form has been likened to "a circle with a tail", whereas the upper case version has been described as "an O with its side smashed in". G serves an important role in maintaining a quality alphabet, surrounded as it is by the notably lackluster "F" and "H".

Ways To Spell Wrong[edit | edit source]

Despite what Lex Luthor would have you think, there are many more ways to spell wrong wrong than there are ways to spell wrong right. The most common wrong example is the spelling WRONGE, which would be pronounced "ronj," which is the wrong way to pronounce wrong, as opposed to "rong," which is the right way to pronounce wrong. For clarity, a brief list of ways to spell wrong right has been compiled.

Ways To Spell Wrong Wrong[edit | edit source]

Ways to Spell Wrong Wrong Wrong[edit | edit source]

  • Wronge Rong
  • Rong Yong
  • Some wrong above, Another wrong above

And to spell Wrong Wrong Right[edit | edit source]

  • Wrong Wrong

Ways To Spell Wrong Right[edit | edit source]

  • Wrong
  • Wrong Right

Usage[edit | edit source]

The word "wrong" is used very differently depending on gender. Females usually almost exclusively use it in a sentence along with the words "you" and "worthless". These sentences invariably end with an exclamation mark. Although it is very rare for males to use this word, it generally goes something like this: "Am I wrong or is that a fork you just threw at me?!".

People That Have Been Wrong[edit | edit source]

  • The guy who started Wikipedia
  • The guy that said "That's just a bit of foam falling off, we'll fix it up when they get back".
  • The guy that said "My mother-in-law is harmless".
  • The guy that said "Those condoms are so safe."
  • The guy that said "It's unsinkable!!!"
  • The guy that said he wasn't dying.
  • The guy that said "Nothing is impossible." (You ever try to slam a revolving door, jackass?) (Actually, it is worth noting that it is possible to slam a revolving door. Simply place a nice large object, such as a trolley, in the gap between door and frame, and slam away!)
  • Therefore, the guy that said you can't slam a revolving door
  • Hilary Duff's nutritionist.
  • The guy that said grues are actually just afraid on the inside
  • My "I'll never leave you" girlfriend
  • Your mom
  • My mom
  • That guy who said this guy was Right
  • Anyone who said they could kill a Grue
  • Australians
  • Anybody who thinks Australians are right
  • Husbands
  • Me
  • Whoever put wives under "People Who Are Never Wrong"
  • The guy that said "It's the blue wire"
  • Americans
  • The guy who made this article
  • Anthony E. Romero III
  • Jim Henson when he famously said "Anyone have any asprin? I think I have a cold."
  • Thom Yorke
  • Anyone who thinks they can even think about thinking about defeating Chuck Norris
  • You
  • Wives

People Who Are Never Wrong[edit | edit source]

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