Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Whiskey Equivalence
Whiskey Equivalence[edit source]
This is the second time I submitted this page today. Problems with the network linky, or juss plain drinkies. Either case: sry... --- di Mario 18:22, 20 August 2007 (UTC) O yeah, what I meant to say is shoot
- Not a review, just a really sad comment from a whisky bore. Scotch is whisky, Irish is whiskey - the bottles in your images are whisky, not whiskey. That doesn't matter a jot as far as the article goes (which isn't bad, and I may review later, given time), but I'm having an extraordinarily pedantic day today, and I would have exploded if I didn't mention it. Sorry. I'll go and grumble at kids in the park or something. --Sir Under User (Hi, How Are You?) VFH KUN 09:40, 22 August 2007 (UTC)
- Thank you for pointing this out to me, I was unaware of the facts. I will try to correct the mistake, but at present have no time time to do so. Probably somewhere during the weekend. Cheerio, -- di Mario 21:06, 22 August 2007 (UTC)
| Humour: | 3 | For all that it's an intriguing idea, I didn't spot many jokes in here yet. See comments. |
| Concept: | 7 | I think you can get quite a lot from this concept, if you approach it the right way. |
| Prose and formatting: | 5 | The overall prose is not bad, but it could do with a good proofread to clear out a lot of little spelling and grammar niggles. |
| Images: | 6 | There are some, and they appear appropriate, but don't really add much as they're used - more inventive captions might help. |
| Miscellaneous: | 7 | With a lot of spit and polish I can see this improving quite a bit. It's up to you, really. |
| Final Score: | 28 | There's the seed of a good idea and article in here, but it needs a lot of attention to really grow. See comments. |
| Reviewer: | --Sir Under User (Hi, How Are You?) VFH KUN 12:51, 19 September 2007 (UTC) | |
OK, I'll try to be more helpful than last time!
I think you need to elaborate on the equivalence here - what exactly is it equivalent to? Monetary value? Simple volume? Something you seem to hint towards, and that I like, is the idea that it's equivalent to the amount of whisky that one needs to consume to make an idea seem like a good one. You could then link to some classic Why? articles, such as Why?:Pour Boiling Hot Water Down Your Trousers? or Why?:Put Down the Duckie?. You could then have fun with explaining how this is researched, and the appropriate equivalent arrived at. Go on to discuss the scale, with appropriate examples, such as playing Russian Roulette for one of the higher ones.
Of course, that's just a suggestion, and feel free to ignore it. But this does need expansion, and some jokes putting into the framework. Try asking some established users for advice, or have another squint at HTBFANJS - I'm always surprised by how many ideas that can give, even if you've read it a few times!
Finally: keep trying. As a whisky aficionado, I really hope you can make a good article out of this!
- Thank you very much for your suggestions, and for the linkies. As for the lack of jokes, you are absolutely right. Basically, it is just a silly idea recounted in a straight tone. And yes, I am not a native speaker of English, so I think when it is more or less ready for production I'll implore the aid of Cainad's gramamr and spleling police squad.
- As for the heart of the concept, I intended one of the humour ingredients to be explicitly not explaining how the WE is measured or calculated, but in stead breezing along assuming every reader can work that out for herself as if it were the most trivial of tasks. Quod non, which leads to a sense of estrangement which in turn adds to the experience of reading the article. Or so I thought.
- Anyroads, I'm taking the article off Pee Review and will be moving the Pee Review page to the articles discussion page. Unfortunately I'm up to eyebrows in work the coming weeks, so I won't be able to hack about much. Well, I suppose that gives me time to think it over.
- And yes, there is still the Whiskey/Whisky contraverse to put straight. Again, thank you, -- di Mario 00:03, 21 September 2007 (UTC)