Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/C-3PO
C-3PO[edit source]
i feel like i lost steam towards the end, so ideas for a stronger finish would be great. also could use one or two more images, but of what?-- 18:15, 24 December 2007 (UTC)
OK, I will have a go... ~~
First of all, is there not really another place for this? Not that I am suggesting we should not have an article on this guy but there might be people who think not...
| Humour: | 6.5 | It has it's moments, but it's not great.
Intro 7.5 Just kinda par. I would cut: He is rarely seen without his robot buddy, R2D2. Threepio is believed to be one of the most loved charcters from the Star Wars saga, along with Han Solo and Jar Jar Binks. Casting 7 Some good ideas, just a bit long. Maybe strip out some of the parts which are not so funny. Character Biography 5 A bit lame.
Galactic Civil War (0 ABY - 4 ABY) 6 I think this would be better if it were shortened a little to. Post Galactic Civil War (4 ABY - 36 ABY) 7 OK. |
| Concept: | 6.5 | Well I think an Article about 3PO is rather important so I really think we need this article, great to everyone who is working on it. Currently I think the main problem with this is that it's missing on the funny.
There are some funny lines in there, here and there. But there is also quite a lot of rather random, non funny stuff. Maybe it's all funny to the most Hardcore of Star Wars fans, but I think you can stand to loose some of the words. In some places you are talking about things which don't add to the humour, and in some places using too many words to say what is funny. Hea, I always say this in my reviews, Just thought I would say it in the concept section. It's more clever rather than funny. Spice it up a bit? More about the sordid affair 3P0 had with Deep Thought maybe HAL9000? No namesake I assure you. 3P0 was camp right? Maybe a Links to a famous Celeb saying something about them being 'just good friends' or something. More about 3P0s sexuality. A hobbies section? As it stands is really is just a chronological list of events, why not tell us more about the guy himself? How does he relax? What does he think of other robots? What does he really want? You could go into his views on a number of different issues, such as politics, religion, oil types. Expand his views. |
| Prose and formatting: | 8.5 | Little wrong with how it's written. If you decide to shorten things a little as I recommend you will tidy up the few (possible) errors which are here and there, but generally I think the style is consistent and works well through the article. I'm not sure I would have done 3P0 as being a created character myself, I would have suggested that he's real, but I'm strange. :) |
| Images: | 4 | Can't give you any more I'm afraid. Only 2 pics? The captions you have are ok, I guess, but not supper funny. There must be a lot of different pics of 3PO around. Surely it's possible to find some and make the middle and bottom of the article look good? |
| Miscellaneous: | 8 | Cos I felt like it. |
| Final Score: | 33.5 | This was difficult to review. I have struggled to come up with too many useful suggestions I know, but it's hard because I have done quite a good job already. I basically think you need to strip out a few parts / words which you don't think are helping the funny, and maybe expand into some new areas. Some more pictures can't be that hard to find. Have a good search for some new ones, and try to fit them in. I think if you do that you might even come up with some new ideas for sections, or ways which the current sections could be improved. |
| Reviewer: | MrN  17:02, Jan 7
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