UnNews:World Taekwondo Federation to open daycare facilities across the US

This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation.

8 January 2010

Tae Kwon Do teaches discipline.

SEOUL, South Korea -- World Taekwondo Federation executive officer Kim Kim announced today his organizations intent to open day care centers in the United States, "to foster values of our revered martial art in young children, to better prepare them for a superior way of life."

"The thinking here is to impart strong morals to children, early and forcefully, if necessary," continued Kim. "In this manner, we will impart the great Korean culture and strength of will to your (American) children, before they get exposed in the hip hop and the tattoos."

Many parents in the country are fed up, and like this observer, would love to be able to beat some little kid ass when necessary. UnNews wishes the Federation good luck with Taekwondo day care, and we encourage to put your little shits into one.

There are two age categories for Taekwondo : 14–17 years and 18 years and older. The day care facilities will be "disciplining" children as old as 13, and as young as 18 months.

Sources

• Kim Ill Duk "I'll kick your ass, you little bastard!" LA Times, January 8, 2010