UnNews:Britpop fan reacts to Dexter revival

Saturday, November 20, 2021

COUNTRY HOUSE, Gay Britain -- A Britpop fan, associated with the infamous chauvinist ladysh culture, has decided to react to the revival of the American Showtime hit show, Dexter. The fan was shocked and horrored to discover that the new version of Dexter is titled Dexter: Newb Lad -- an obvious reference to the New Lad movement, in which men walk up the street behaving like 90s-era Liam Gallagher, meaning walking down the street looking intoxicated with a one-brow and a beer can and chanting the Kazakhstan anthem from the original Borat movie.

What the Arse was that all about? Wasn't it enough to ruin the show 10 years ago with that terrible ending? Dexter killing his sister and becoming a lumberjack? And now Debra is a fucking ghost and Pulp haven't put down a new record in 20 years? And Britney is totally free to do whatever she wants with her money? And no one even knows what I'm talking about? Because no one even knows what New Lad means? Because now it's all about MeToo and shite? And the Dexter finale was actually pretty good? It took me 10 freaking years to realize that? What kind of putz have I become? And do I must continue asking these questions? Maybe I should switch to Spanish to get out of this questions-limbo? Do I remember something from that Pet Shop Boys album? ¿Cuanto tiempo tengo que esperar? ¿O I see. There is nothing to complain about. Suede are more active than ever and Supergrass has released a live album one year ago. I guess it was too emotional for me to see Dexter and Debra in the same room again, even if one is Casper the Unfriendly Ghost and the other is Dexter the Unemotionally Roach.

As long as Debra's bellybutton is on my bloody VOD collection, I'm a brand new lad.