UnBooks:The Three Weird Sisters are Alive and Well in Washington, DC
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Purchased for UnLibrary on 11 July 2006
“Love those gals...”
– Macduff on the Three Weird Sisters
“Umm....we're dead. And in the other play.”
– Rosencrantz and Guildenstern on the Three Weird Sisters
The Three Weird Sisters are Alive and Well in Washington, DC[edit | edit source]
SCENE I. Vietnam Veterans Memorial.[edit | edit source]
First Witch
- Sister, see these names inscribed
- Hereon; they fury imbibed
- And drank overlong, their watch
- Done; long life have they botched.
Second Witch
- What sad lot, these adventurers caught
- Always seeking aught for naught.
First Witch
Second Witch
- I remember, do I, do I
- Trapp’d him in a filthy lie
- The only thing that I regret
- Is we did not photos get.
Third Witch
- Let us get on with our walk
- No more need such useless talk.
SCENE II. The Lincoln Memorial.[edit | edit source]
First Witch
- Where hast thou been, sisters?
Second Witch
- Lost in Foggy Bottom.
Third Witch
- Sister, where thou?
First Witch
- A family man had oil on his hands,
- And glutt’d, and glutt’d, and glutt’d:--
- ‘Share now,’ said I:
- ‘New Order, witch!’ the dynasty lord shouts.
- His son’s to Texas gone, master o’ the Realm:
- But like he of Bones and Skull,
- I’ll make my way and take my cull,
- I’ll do, I’ll do, and I’ll do.
Second Witch
- Let me whip the mare.
Third Witch
- Such sisterly care.
First Witch
- Add my lash for luck.
Third Witch
- And thank thee for thy sister’s hate
- Now of this, that brood’s
- Playground state, let not abate
- Desire and fool games.
- I’ll whisper in the son’s ear:
- The father’s lust make him hear
- Hang about that Office used;
- Fate to live a man confused:
- Hopeless through years two times four
- Shall he dwindle, to the core:
- An apple bit by the worm,
- Son doomed by invader’s germ.
- Look what I have.
Second Witch
- Show me, show me.
First Witch
- Here have I a tortured’s hood
- From sand chamber as he stood.
Drum within
Third Witch
- A drum! A drum!
- Cheney doth come.
Enter CHENEY and BUSH.[edit | edit source]
Cheney
- Rhetoric. Love-one.
Bush
- How do you expect me to play this well?
Cheney
- Do you think you are capable of playing well?
Bush
- Have you considered that I’m more interested in what you think?
Cheney
- When will you learn to think for yourself?
Bush
- I do think for myself!
Cheney
- Statement! Love-two.
Bush
- What are these, dwarf-women?
Cheney
- Who the hell knows?
Bush
- Ah ha! Rhetoric. One-two.
Cheney
- Damn! (clutches chest)
Bush
- Foul. Heart attacks don’t count. Two-all.
First Witch
- Fair sir, think you not
- Your companion’s ail
- Is truthfully bought?
Bush
- He’ll be all right in a second. Happens all the time.
Cheney (relaxing)
- Statement! Two to three.
Second Witch
- Though now on vacation we
- Bring to you a prophecy.
Bush
- What’s a prophecy?
Cheney
- Don’t you know?
Bush
- Who carries a dictionary on loan?!
Cheney
- When was the last time you were able to read an intelligence report on your own?
Bush
- All right, Brainiac, stow—
Cheney
- Gotcha! Statement! Gimme! Game!
Bush
- I can’t believe I got you that new pacemaker.
Third Witch
- Listen or block as you must
- But take from our lips the thrust
- You’ll be crown and you’ll be king
- In long duet will you sing
- But ’ware the excesses laid
- For abuse at Abu Ghraib.
Witches vanish.
Cheney
- Serious words, take serious care.
Bush
- Yeah, well, who cares about some dumb witches?
Cheney
- We’re not playing anymore.
Bush
- One-love!
Exeunt.