Malicious Face

Malicious Face
A Malicious Face, background image removed.
Scientific classification
Domain	Gehenna
Kingdom	Mass
Phylum	Octo
Class	Princepsocto
Order	Saxum
Family	Sphaerayeetus
Genus	Nefas
Species	Faciem

Nefas faciem, also known as a Malicious Face, or commonly as a "Maurice" is a floating stone mass that is connected to the ground by eight mostly invisible legs that is known to commonly attack people unprovoked, hence being entitled a Malicious Face, as it usually has a face on it.

Behavior & Description

A Malicious Face is generally a mass of stone, at first sight appearing to float, but it is in reality connected to the ground by invisible spider-like legs; its insides have been seen sparingly, but it appears to be mostly made of weed on the inside. It behaves incredibly aggressively, and it is likely that this and its apparent floating is connected to its internal weed system of weed. It is able to turn some weed into "Weed Orbs" that are incredibly hot masses of weed shot at random innocent bystanders to injure or murder them. These weed orbs do, however, grant squirrels levitation, leading to flying squirrels, which end up capable of fucking, allowing an entire species of flying squirrels to exist.

Habitat & Origins

Origins

Maurices originate from Hell, and are actually demonic creatures, which some believe explains their malevolent nature. They are found commonly throughout Hell, but become more common throughout the deepest reaches of Hell. Their origins on Earth are unknown, but arrived through the somehow-existing Gulf of Alaska connection to Hell, that allowed Florps to arrive on Earth.

Habitat

Maurices are believed to be capable of living anywhere, on account of Hell being very hostile in environmental terms. They are very, very common in the Third Layer of Hell, Gluttony, as being weed counts as gluttony, and so does smoking weed excessively. On Earth, they are known to inhabit Washington and Oregon (which are known for high levels of weed). There have been noted Maurice migrations from these places to Florida during the winter, which some claim is evidence they do not inhabit Hell's ninth layer, Treachery.

Physiology

A Maurice is made up of 4 main components, the Weed Containers in the center, the Weed Tubes connecting it to the Maurice's mouth, the Weed In-Between as its blood, and the Stone Skin as its skin.

Weed Tubes

These are soft hollow tubes that flow from the Maurice's "mouth" (Weed Orb exit point) to the Weed Containers and vice versa, that contain pure Weed. Maurices are sometimes hunted for their pure Weed.

Weed Containers

Weed Containers are incredibly hard and very dense kidney-shaped, rocked-coated, Weed plasma containing things located deep inside the Maurice. Their Weed plasma allows the Maurice to stabilize itself as does its spider-like legs.

Weed In-Between

The Weed In-Between is a Maurice's blood, effectively. It contains chemicals that, upon reaction with air, instantly turn it into real blood. It contains incredibly pure Weed, that is absorbed by the Weed tubes to be fed into the containers.

Stone Skin

ROCK.

Oh also, it can shoot lasers (the Weed Laser) that's just really concentrated Weed Orbs.

Overhunting & Commercial Usage

Maurices are commonly hunted in North America, which has been deemed an issue by the practically communist Canadian government, but absolutely fucking not by the American government, who, for once, in some magical display of their little intelligence, has called Maurices a real threat, and plan to eradicate Maurices by 2035, though it is likely that WON'T be happening by then given their lack of commitment to "promises" they make. However, Biden did instate a few restrictions that were soon lifted by now-president Donald Trump, which has stabilized the Maurice population at 6.9 Million. Below is a short chart on Maurice population from 2000 to 2025.

Malicious Face Population, 2000–2025

2000	2010	2020	2025
7.2 Million	7.19 Million	6.9 Million	6.9 Million

The commercial usage of Maurice lies in its weed-intensive innards and its stone skin. The species' stone skin alone accounts for 6% of all stone supply, and it is likely that most modern structures contain some Maurice Stone Skin. Meanwhile, its weed innards are commonly harvested after breaking its skin with a hammer by hunters of it due to its chemical purity and accounts for 12% of all weed sold in the U.S. and Canada in 2020.