Death to America

Contrary to widespread media belief, terrorism is not the leading cause of death in America. Freedom fries and big tobacco companies kill more people than terrorists every day.

Freedom fries have brought more death to America than all jihadi combined.

Don't blame me, blame the chicken!

Pick your poison:

• Lawyers
• Samurai Lincoln
• Food warfare launched by France on the United States
• Goths on drugs
• Death by Telemarketing
• Ralph Nader coming at you in an exploding Ford Pinto
• The Amway wars
• Natural Causes

This is a disambiguation page. We have absolutely no idea where you might want to go to from here. Umm... you know what? Clicking the "Back" button might be a good idea right about now.