User talk:RAHB

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Th-the m-m-most con-confident new-Newspaper in a wh-while

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Talk Archive 19 (7/11/13 - 8/15/14)

I looked in recent changes and found out you archived[edit]


Now when someone goes to your talk page they will see a bunch of gore. — Sir Y KUN NotM UGM No uncyclopedia.png (talk) 17:48:27 08-16-'14 UTC

Amazing. I lol'd. -RAHB 18:29, 16 August 2014 (UTC)

We gave The UnSignpost an enema, so now it's regular![edit]

The UnSignpost
Better sign it.
 ~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) Beeverpedia.png ~ Fri, Aug 22 '14 2:09 (UTC)

Your music[edit]

How do you do it? -- MagicBus Talk to me! 13:42, 23 August 2014 (UTC)

A guitar, a dream, and a little bit of lube. -RAHB 17:34, 23 August 2014 (UTC)
I would love to buy it but I don't have the money. -- MagicBus Talk to me! 19:41, 28 August 2014 (UTC)
All of it's name-your-price stuff, meaning you can enter 0 dollars as your total and have it for...ready for it?...Absolutely Free! Praise Creative Commons and the internet! -RAHB 16:05, 29 August 2014 (UTC)


Thanks for nomming the painting article, very nice of you. I bow and remove my magic tophat. The page itself, something happened, the gif of the spiders broke since it's been written and now the page that the gif is uploaded on says that something about its size or pristine condition or all-around spideyness may have broken it. Do you know if it can be fixed, or if it would work if I uploaded another one? Thanks again! Please and Puzzled in Pittsburgh, Aleister 23:17 23-8-14

Hmmm, odd. The gif works for me. It may be best to upload a smaller version though I guess. Not really sure what the technical issues are that the image page mentions, but Bizzeebeever or Lyrithya would probably be the best people to ask about that. I'm just a pretty face when it comes to these things. On a related note, nobody around here is wearing their prescription eyewear. -RAHB 00:29, 24 August 2014 (UTC)

Jennifer Lawwrence picture[edit]

I understand all your reasons for deleting it. I'll just find a new picture. -- IFYMB! Talk to me baby! 21:52, 5 September 2014 (UTC)

Wow, that was easy! Thanks for that, man. Might I suggest using this image that Kip snapped during the Space Ghost marathon the other day, which happened to coincide with the picture-leaking event? -RAHB 21:56, 5 September 2014 (UTC)
*phhh* Back in my day we weren't so amiable about these kinds of things. Drama was king, and all was right with the world. Plus we are totally missing the chance to call RAHB a fascist gay horse loving bitchtits who probably loves flavored Cheetos or something. He's some kind of fucking joke. The Woodburninator Wood burning.gif Minimal Effort  22:29, 5 September 2014 (UTC)
The picture you deleted was the nude photo, wasn't it? Well, good thing that you did, since I diligently avoid seeing leaked nude photos on principle. Lord Scofield Stark 09:44, 6 September 2014 (UTC)
I deleted it just for you. My fragile little cupcake. -RAHB 18:57, 6 September 2014 (UTC)


The UnSignpost
Telling You Stuff You Already Knew, But With Different Words!

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 03:14, 7 September 2014 (UTC)

Forum:Proposal of Changes - IRC[edit]

Hi RAHB! I know you've written a very good article on IRC with two other users, which as far as I know the only IRC collaboration Uncyclopedia has heard of, and so would like to ask you - what do you think of my proposal in the forum? Anton (talk) 17:07, 13 September 2014 (UTC)

I think it sounds a bit forced and I think that a lot of IRC users won't be super keen with a formal thing like that. The intent is good, but I think you'll be happy to hear that it isn't exactly as barren a writing environment as you seem to believe. The penis article is just one of many instances of ideas happening in the IRC. For example, all of the articles that I wrote in my early days in collaboration with The Thinker were conceived and created over IRC. Loads of other articles have received the same treatment, although I don't know of any off the top of my head. But ideas and feedback happen daily in IRC. When writing competitions and the like happen, Uncyc IRC users have a history of bouncing their ideas off of each other and growing those ideas. I think maybe half of my articles have come into being because of goofy conversations we'd be having in the IRC, and I can attest the same for users like Kip the Dip, TKF, and Zombiebaron.
My favorite example of this was this past Happy Monkey Competition. Colin, Kip, Zombiebaron, Cat and I spent a lot of time talking about the competition and our ideas on IRC, along with other users who weren't competing but were interested in what we came up with, and we also tried to make it slightly competitive to give ourselves more incentive to finish the articles in time. Later, Banzaikitten helped Cat with the English in his article, and someone reminded me to nominate the good articles on VFH. Yes, there's a lot of dicking around on IRC, but that's because we're all friends and not robots. We don't spend every second of the day on Uncyclopedia specifically because we like to give ourselves the illusion that we have social lives. But make no mistake that it's a very creative environment. Even when we're not working on our own material, we're discussing other people's humor in all its forms, and studying techniques from other humorists like Dan Harmon. It's pretty cool. -RAHB 18:08, 13 September 2014 (UTC)
Ah! That's very interesting! I wish I had more time so I could join you guys. Anton (talk) 21:21, 13 September 2014 (UTC)
I think that's another misconception about IRC. A lot of people seem to think that you join and that you have to commit to chatting for the entire time that it's loaded on your computer screen. In reality, it's a lot more fluid than that. Sometimes during the day, nobody is talking, or not so many people are talking, because we're doing other things, like writing or reading articles, or browsing other websites or doing any number of other things at and away from the computer. People enter and exit the conversation at will and it's understood that sometimes if they're not talking it means they're busy or went away from the computer or fell asleep. The conversation flows to the whims of whoever's around and talking, and if someone doesn't like the current topic of conversation they're not obligated to take part in it, they can just wait until that topic has passed and we're talking about something different. Sometimes multiple conversations are going on simultaneously, sometimes people take their conversations to private messages or other ad-hoc smaller channels. It's a non-binding form of communication and you can put in and take out however much or little you want to. Some people just idle in the channel and literally never say anything, but they read the conversations sometimes to get some entertainment. It's all very relaxed, and that's the attitude that we like to convey, but that's also the general attitude of most groups using the IRC protocol, which has existed since 1988. Also, butts. -RAHB 02:41, 14 September 2014 (UTC)
I had no idea you were all IRCing during the Happy Monkey. That's nice to hear. Now if only we could find a way to combine that with poopdicks...and we would all be is our day! --ShabiDOO 03:02, 14 September 2014 (UTC)
The Happy Poopdick Competition would be an event unlike anything ever seen. Groucho Marx and Richard Pryor would be jealous as hell. -RAHB 18:32, 14 September 2014 (UTC)

Primitive Radio Gods[edit]

Ever heard of this band?--Ketchup Boss has a openly gay crush on Bertie Wooster (talk) 21:51, 15 September 2014 (UTC)

I've heard of your mom. OWNED! HIGH FIVE! -RAHB 00:25, 16 September 2014 (UTC)

Unsignpost delivery attempt numbr hideous implosion[edit]

The UnSignpost
Reading This Is The Mysterious Second Step To Getting Profit From Stealing Childrens' Underwear!

Brace Yourselves, The UnSignpost is Coming![edit]

The UnSignpost
The Newspaper Not Secretly Controlled By Mordillo, We Swear!

Recently featured[edit]

I am trying to generate a more intelligent Recently Featured list using the DPL from Uncyclopedia:VFH/Featured. I have hit a wall here, in my playpit. Any idea if we can get the DPL to show the article name and not the Vfh link? And anyway we can get it to hide the 0 article? Leverage (talk) 10:17, 24 September 2014 (UTC)

Boy are you ever asking the wrong person. I don't think I understood any of that. Lyrithya might. Or someone else. I always say Lyrithya. She comes to mind quite easily. Like a pie. -RAHB 23:39, 26 September 2014 (UTC)

Lou Reed[edit]

Let's take a walk on the wild side!--Ketchup Boss has a openly gay crush on Bertie Wooster (talk) 21:00, 24 September 2014 (UTC)

Do you talk this way IRL too? Like do you just go up to people and yell "QUESTION MARK & THE MYSTERIANS! THEY ARE A GREAT BAND DO YOU LIKE THEM!" And then do they stare at you and say "who are you and what are you doing in my house?" -RAHB 23:42, 26 September 2014 (UTC)

96 Tears then?--Ketchup Boss has a openly gay crush on Bertie Wooster (talk) 21:19, 27 September 2014 (UTC)

The USP is coming for you! (and your little dog too)[edit]

The UnSignpost
We're delivering it to your door anyways!

Excuse me, sir, do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, the USP?[edit]

The UnSignpost
Telling You Stuff You Already Knew, But With Different Words!

dicks lol: It's UnSignpost time![edit]

The UnSignpost
Because if the rumors don't spread at the salon, we must spread them in the news.

The UnSignpost is back, baby! (And also a little bit of front)[edit]

The UnSignpost
The Newspaper That Replaces Analysis With Flashy Graphics!

Re-feature queue[edit]

If you want, you can go to Uncyclopedia:Re-feature queue/Nominate and pick one featured article that you wrote to be re-featured. You can also pick three features written by someone else to re-feature. --Talk to me! Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 20:09, 17 November 2014 (UTC)

Sounds sexy. -RAHB 09:55, 19 November 2014 (UTC)


 ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-us.png Tue, Dec 2 '14 3:36 (UTC)

SPAMSPAMSPAMSPAMSPAM? -RAHB 02:18, 4 December 2014 (UTC)
MAPSMAPSMAPSMAPS?--The Defender of Light >Grand Warlock Danzathel Aetherwing Inventory 05:15, 6 December 2014 (UTC)

Please sing[edit]

UnTunes:Do_Islamic_State_Know_It's_Christmas? Leverage (talk) 12:19, 2 December 2014 (UTC)

Working on any bad taste articles?[edit]

Are you planning on entering any bad taste articles for The Aristocrat's Turkey Day Ball? If not, then would you consider swapping as judges on it? (see Forum:Aristocrat's Turkey Day Ball 2014 Official Headquarters) --EveryOtherUsernameWasTaken(get dtf) 19:30, 2 December 2014 (UTC)

Now that you mention it, I accidentally started writing an Aristocrats article thinking I was judging Bad Taste. Zombiebaron okay'd its entry in Bad Taste anyway, but if you and I switch it probably makes the most sense. I'd just say run it by Zombiebaron first so everybody's on the same page. -RAHB 23:35, 2 December 2014 (UTC)
Okay great! --EveryOtherUsernameWasTaken(get dtf) 01:39, 3 December 2014 (UTC)

Mail, checkem[edit]

Hello, RAHB. Please check your spam folder – you've got spam!
It may take a few minutes from the time the email is sent for it to show up in your inbox. You can ignore this at any time.
Holy shit. When did we get this spiffy template? -RAHB 19:05, 18 December 2014 (UTC)

I'm back![edit]

Ever since I've been bad as TheHauntingHour2, I'm back! YAAAAAY! :D :D :D :D Revue66 (talk) 21:44, 20 December 2014 (UTC)

Hey Rhad[edit]

Can you make a larger version of No Wikipedia.png this? Also, if you have the time, replace facist with patriarchal. Pretty please? --The Defender of Light >Grand Warlock Danzathel Aetherwing Inventory 01:11, 28 January 2015 (UTC)

Uh. Isn't that a really easy thing that literally anybody could do? -RAHB 21:09, 29 January 2015 (UTC)
Your mom is a really easy thing that literally anybody could do. --Talk to me! Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 21:19, 29 January 2015 (UTC)
if I could do it I would, but I can't. I'll give you a reach around later. --The Defender of Light >Grand Warlock Danzathel Aetherwing Inventory 00:52, 30 January 2015 (UTC)
OOOOOOOO SHOTS FIRED! MAD mama joke skills! Denza did you see what this fool be throwin' down?! -RAHB 20:35, 1 February 2015 (UTC)

Vote, Vote, Vote[edit]

It's that time of the year again! We're going to be showing off our Top Ten Articles of 2014 soon but so far, very few people have voted. It's all up to you to decide what's the best of the best! Go to Forum:Top 10 Articles of 2014 and vote now! --Talk to me! Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 02:24, 30 January 2015 (UTC)

Oh shit son, I didn't know there was a voting page. I'll get on that post-haste. -RAHB 20:32, 1 February 2015 (UTC)

hey rahb[edit]

when you can shoot me a text at 210 287 4605, thanks — Sir Y KUN NotM UGM No uncyclopedia.png (talk) 20:32:55 04-19-'15 UTC


Would you know how to create an effect whereby hovering your mouse over text reveals more text? I want to use it in my signature. Icons-flag-au.png XY007talkcontributions 03:33, 2 June 2015 (UTC)

Afraid I can't help you there. I'm a complete novice when it comes to html or javascript or whatever it is the kids are using these days for all their shinies. Not sure who's active who'd know about it either. Sorry about that. -RAHB 08:03, 2 June 2015 (UTC)
YOU ACTUALLY BOTHERED TO SEND ME A MESSAGE! That's so cool! OK, maybe I'm not cut out for Uncyc. Icons-flag-au.png XY007talkcontributions 10:01, 2 June 2015 (UTC)
I hope it's not because I'm bad at javascript. Years ago when I decided not to do anything with my life I never realized that it would make somebody leave Uncyclopedia. -RAHB 23:33, 2 June 2015 (UTC)
I know how! LOLOLz  –  User talk:Zana Dark User:Zana Dark Sheenicon.gif (ooh!) (aah!) ...·º•ø®@» LEG CUN GUN DUN 18:42, 11 September 2015
See, look there. Zana knows how. I only know how to party. -RAHB 19:49, 16 September 2015 (UTC)

Happy Monkey Time!!![edit]


Happy Monkey has been scratching his coconut sized balls for days almost bursting with anticipation of the competition. Remember...the articles are not judged by which is most likely to be a featured article. 30 points are awarded...10 each for originality, creativity and making you laugh. Don't forget the originality and creativity. You can slightly modify the topic if you wish to put it in a different space (unbooks, unreviews, unpoetry etc). If you have any doubt...ask Shabidoo.

Your topic is:

Anti-social Behaviour Order

Good luck and have fun. You have 48 hours from the moment this was posted. Happy monkey has very itchy and blue coconuts to take care of! RAH RAH RAH!!! ShabiDOO 22:55, 31 July 2015 (UTC)


I downloaded all of your music! -- MagicBus Talk to me! 12:22, 26 October 2015 (UTC)

Cool. Sorry about the inevitable noise complaints and medical bills. -RAHB 18:55, 16 November 2015 (UTC)
I like all of your music! Keep up the good work! -- SpookyBus 15:23, 25 November 2015 (UTC)


Would it be possible for you to unlock the Rap music page?--EpicWinner (talk) 08:36, 17 December 2015 (UTC)

Do you mean Hip-hop music? That's where the redirect trail leads me. And what would you like to do with the page when it's unlocked? -RAHB 19:22, 19 December 2015 (UTC)

Star Wars[edit]

Since the new Star Wars movie came out, do you anyone who'd be up for writing an article on the greatest villain ever, Sheev?--EpicWinner (talk) 22:41, 24 December 2015 (UTC)

If somebody wants to write it, I'm sure they'll do so eventually. -RAHB 22:42, 24 December 2015 (UTC)
I might be persuaded to inject some content... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

Can buros change other people's usernames here?[edit]

If so, can you change mine to The Regisaurus of karro?--Sockpuppet of regisaurusjacobi (talk) 08:37, 29 December 2015 (UTC)


CIIK GIT , DIBT; BYT AB AHSSNGI,E, The Woodburninator Wood burning.gif Minimal Effort  06:10, 8 February 2016 (UTC) RUKW==== TUKSE LOL TISLTED IT BPPPPOOOOPUS XD The Woodburninator Wood burning.gif Minimal Effort 

Oh man... I honestly have little idea on this one. "CIIK GIT , DIBT; BYT" could mean anything. "AB AHSSNGI,E," is almost assuredly me calling you an asshole. Everything after my first sig was most definitely me being excited about remembering to tilde correctly. The Woodburninator Wood burning.gif Minimal Effort  01:26, 9 February 2016 (UTC)
But POOOOOOOOPUS. WHAT DOES IT MEAN?! -RAHB 17:52, 16 March 2016 (UTC)

Remember when people used to be active at least once a year?[edit]

Kevin Spacey and Brad Pit in the same movie lol

Super awesome happy "Seven deadly sins" competition where Shabidoo will win and everyone else colapses into suicidal depression fun week!!! SIGN UP!!! ShabiDOO 14:29, 15 May 2016 (UTC)

I see you[edit]

Doing stuff.... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

You saw nothing. You don't even see me right now. This is all a dream. -RAHB 08:05, 14 October 2016 (UTC)

Can you do me a solid[edit]

I know this seems strange, but I'm looking to seek a name change on the site to Sir Peas and I don't really want to have the "e whizz" on their anymore as it detracts from the intention of my original name and which was originally a play on the "Cheese Whizz" product. Is this a possibility? Thanks.  Kamek siggy.png ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 04:19 12.12.16

Sure, that can be arranged. Da Rulez say you have to be super super extra totally sure with sugar on top that you want me to change it and that you're not gonna like ask again for a different change in like a month. Please place your hand on this bible and solemnly swear to tell the whole truth under penalty of God's holy wrath or something. And then yeah I can do it by like clicking a button. -RAHB 06:31, 18 December 2016 (UTC)
Actually, just "Sir Whizz" would suffice. Final answer.  Kamek siggy.png ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 02:57 1.15.17
Got it. Should only take about a minute. It's gonna move all your userspace though so RIP your watchlist. -RAHB 18:39, 20 January 2017 (UTC)

Could you also help me do a solid[edit]

I have horrible watery diarrhea and I need some stool hardeners ASAP. -- Kip > Talk Works Sophia It's Peanut Better Jelly Time!!! Carlton2.gif Rotating Rick Astley.gif derp Sexy Snoo.png Knight of the Order USA! 10:36, Dec. 12, 2016

Sure, that can be arranged. Da Rulez say you have to be super super extra totally sure with sugar on top that you want these stool hardeners and that you're not gonna go drinking a ton of milk and eating raw meats for like the next month. Please place your hand on this stack of toilet paper and solemnly swear to tell the whole truth under penalty of uncontrollable sharts. And then yeah I can press the stool hardener button. -RAHB 06:31, 18 December 2016 (UTC)


Sup? --MasterWangs Dildoriken.gif CUNT and proud of it! 07:57, 20 April 2017 (UTC)

aaaaayyyyeeee bro whatchu doin i see u muffkah. Jus getttin by writin some gooooood shit man gotta get that music stuff goin too know'm'sayn? -RAHB 17:27, 20 April 2017 (UTC)
Alas I can no longer join you in drug paradise on account of "serious law business". Unless of course it's coke, coke seems to be allowed in my profession... a lot. Also enjoy the vandalism to your userpage <3 <3 <3 <3 --MasterWangs Dildoriken.gif CUNT and proud of it! 04:03, 10 May 2017 (UTC)
I've never really been in a drug paradise myself. Maybe when stores start selling weed in my state next year I can reach some kind of drug zen though. And stupid Wageslav reverted your vandalism, the meanie >:( -RAHB 03:07, 11 May 2017 (UTC)

Elektrik Skuba Krew?[edit]

Is Elektrik Skuba Krew done with making or releasing albums? -- MagicBus Can you ride my Magic Bus? 13:41, 20 April 2017 (UTC)

Not really no we've just been busy and doing other stuff. Big Scary Orderlies is active though and I'm working on a new Electric Beard album. -RAHB 17:27, 20 April 2017 (UTC)
Sweet can't wait to hear them :) Plus, ESK is a great band!-- MagicBus Can you ride my Magic Bus? 20:09, 20 April 2017 (UTC)
The two new BSO albums are on bandcamp linked on my userpage but yeah the Electric Beard one might be a few weeks to a couple of months away. There is a single up called Escalator Punks though. -RAHB 22:33, 20 April 2017 (UTC)
Free I assume. If you ever need a drummer for anything I'll be glad to help. -- MagicBus Can you ride my Magic Bus? 00:06, 21 April 2017 (UTC)
Free and while the offer is appreciated I'm doin' alright for now. -RAHB 01:49, 21 April 2017 (UTC)
Alright. -- MagicBus Can you ride my Magic Bus? 01:51, 21 April 2017 (UTC)
Forgot to tell you I also can provide vocals. -- MagicBus Can you ride my Magic Bus? 19:58, 21 April 2017 (UTC)

Thought of an idea[edit]

I was thinking of making a Song Title Generator… oh wait I did. Can you help by adding words? I'll finish by putting the formula 3 more times. That way you can have a 4 word song title generator. -- MagicBus Can you ride my Magic Bus? 01:37, 23 April 2017 (UTC)

I'm pretty sure that lots of those already exist. And I personally come up with my own song titles. -RAHB 09:00, 23 April 2017 (UTC)
Alright. -- MagicBus Can you ride my Magic Bus? 11:20, 23 April 2017 (UTC)


Saw you guys put out a Outtakes album for ESK! Excited to hear what's on it. It's good to see ESK is not dead yet. -- MagicBus Can you ride my Magic Bus? 18:17, 11 May 2017 (UTC)

RAHBot is back[edit]

EFPEC Super Cyborgs

Is now time to use RAHBot. --Emily Frostë (talk) 03:18, 9 June 2017 (UTC)

I need to eat some stinky turds[edit]

I like to eat da poop. I need some poop, some turds, and a bit of RAHBot, our kid. --EFPEC 06:51, 16 July 2017 (UTC)

In my free time...[edit]

I like to write lyrics (no sheet music, just lyrics). I can write some very good lyrics! -- SpookyBus 19:46, 27 October 2017 (UTC)

I'm very proud of you friend :) -RAHB 00:38, 30 October 2017 (UTC)
I've doing this for a couple of years now. -- SpookyBus 18:11, 30 October 2017 (UTC)

Whoring for my article[edit]

Hello RAHB, I'm currently bitching & whoring for my VFH article L7, whold you mind reading it and hopefully voting for It? Thanks :) ~ Kakun · talk 05:32, 15 December 2017 (UTC)

Vote, Please?[edit]