Forum:Oh no, the holiday jihads have already begun...

Forums: Index > Village Dump > Oh no, the holiday jihads have already begun... (talk)

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OK, maybe not, but i was just wondering, since i'm still not sure what you guys do around here for Christmas or Chchchanukkah or whatever you celebrate (though I'd wager you're all godless barbarians without any sense of tradition). Should our yuletide reskin say "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Holidays"? I mean, I don't wanna offend any Jews. Seems like somehting we should maybe think about, or at least make some witty jokes and soon after forget about it. What do you think? --Señor DiZtheGreat  CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 22:33, 7 December 2006 (UTC)

Poll

Please vote below. Results will be shown when you have voted.
You are not entitled to view results of this poll before you have voted.

Merry Christmas

Happy Holidays

Fuck the Jews

Hanuka

Hankuna Matata

Chanuka

Ninjchucka

Cherry Mristmas

Piraten-dan

Hail Cthulhu

Ramen-dan

Yak Shaving Day

Horus' Birthday

Bah Humbug

Weasel Stomping Day

Kwanza

Thetan Zapping Day

Winter Solstice

Loki's Birthday

I can't believe it's not a holiday!

Jedistmist

Sithica

Nondenomination Seasonal Holiday

Secular Stick It To The Religious Wackos Day

Merry Athemist

Festivist

National get drunk with family members and make a jerk out of yourself day

BENSONmas

Christman

Ouroboropalooza (come support your favorite self-cannibalising reptilian overlord!, December 28, 600 pm, Sunset Plaza, there'll be fireworks! ...and a blood ritual, but nothing you need to worry about...

There were 0 votes since the poll was created on 01:38, 13 January 2013.

poll-id 39091E517E04B857FAFA036EDC168329

What happened to hailing the Flying Spaghetti Monster? Ramen-dan is coming up you know.... --Composure1 23:58, 7 December 2006 (UTC)

Happy Non-Denominational Politically-Correct Merry Festive Winter Celebratory Season! Everybody have a nice glass of non-alcoholic sherry and a mince pie! -- 00:22, 8 December 2006 (UTC)

• FOR --—Braydie 00:23, 8 December 2006 (UTC)
• Against -- "Winter"?? That's offensive. What if I live near the equator where I only have 2 seasons: dry and rainy. --Composure1 00:24, 8 December 2006 (UTC)

...and look at my skin, I'm an autumn!--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 03:02, 8 December 2006 (UTC)

• Against -- Don't you know that it is politically incorrect to say politically correct? You need to change the name. Besides I am opposed to 'winter' being in there because it is summer here. hehehehe --KWild 04:37, 8 December 2006 (UTC)
• Weak for, how dare you be offensive to non-northern hemispherians?! --Uncyclon - Do we still link to BENSON? 09:55, 8 December 2006 (UTC)

Hmm what about changing winter to last month of the year?--—Braydie 15:25, 8 December 2006 (UTC)

Bah! I use the Aztec calendar and this certainly isn't the last month of the year for me. And it isn't in the Hebrew and Muslim calendars either. --Composure1 19:45, 8 December 2006 (UTC)

Against: It's offensive to manic depressives to use the term "happy" --Sir Jam 20:01, 8 December 2006 (UTC)

It's offensive to the illiterate to use words. --Señor DiZtheGreat  CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 21:30, 8 December 2006 (UTC)

I added in more holiday names to represent the many faiths and lack of faiths out there. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 01:55, 9 December 2006 (UTC)

Giftmas. Satan Claus would approve. --66.102.73.18 18:14, 9 December 2006 (UTC)

Awesome! I like how people keep adding options to the voting block...so that all previous votes are erased and we get to do it all over again. It's the Memento of democracy! Hurrah!--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 21:14, 9 December 2006 (UTC)

So you just vote again. I have Firefox 2.0 and it won't even let me vote! So I got it a lot worse than you do, because I am not even allowed to vote. It is not my fault that whomever wrote the poll forgot the other important special days of this season. Save the whining and crying for Livejournal. If you don't like that the poll resets when someone adds something to it, then petition the Wiki coders to change the code so that they can add in more options without resetting the votes. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 21:21, 9 December 2006 (UTC)

Deep breaths! I was joking...and Firefox was a terrible movie, I didn't even know that they made a sequel.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 21:47, 9 December 2006 (UTC)

Yeah Firefox 2.0 only works if you think in Russian in order to use it. In Soviet Russia Internet web browser surfs you! --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 03:39, 10 December 2006 (UTC)

The new polls work with Firefox 2.0 now, yay! I don't even need to think in Russian to use Firefox 2.0 now. In Soviet Russia, poll votes on you! The bad news, is that, yes indeed, wait for it, wait for it, the poll options, yeah I said the poll options, you heard me, the poll options, get this, the poll options have been reset again! Don't blame me, I didn't do it this time. I think it was The Grinch, or maybe Scrooge McDuck, yeah, that's it, that's the ticket! Why don't we just reset the poll every day and save everyone the trouble from worrying that it will be reset again? Why not? Not like anyone cares about it anyway. I mean I don't even know how to make those templates to give people holiday cards or whatever in their talk pages. Oh hell, I'll just reset it again because Seinfeld fans want me to add in Festivist anyway. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 03:25, 21 December 2006 (UTC)

Bah, humbug!

• I'm preferential to "Modusoperandi is working both the night before Christmas and Christmas night this year. Harumph!" (there's an obvious "A Christmas Carol" reference, which I refuse to make. Actually, there are a bunch of "A Christmas Carol" that I refuse to make. Instead I'll point you to wiki ebenezer which, in an incredible case of coincidence literally just got vandalized. So I'm not the only one, apparently.)--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 03:19, 8 December 2006 (UTC)

lol, that's a wonderful piece of vandalism in that the vandal actually said in the edit summary what he'd done- these master criminals, they always leave one fatal flaw in their plans... --Sir Jam 08:49, 8 December 2006 (UTC)

The best part is that the edit summary was longer than the article at that point.--<<>> 13:34, 8 December 2006 (UTC)

Ah well Larry the Cable Guy says that those Anti-Jesus moron freaks want to make it so that we sing Silent Night or Joy to the World that it is as morally and ethically bad as murder and rape and that we would get sued by the ACLU and also get locked up in jail with no bail for singing those religious songs in public. Those Anti-Jesus Morons turning everyone into uptight non-smoking Anti-Jesus Anti-Gun Political Correctness tofu eating tree hugging commies! (Paraphrased from his Pissed-Off Christmas Poem from the "A Very Larry Christmas" CD) Oh by the way, Happy Secular Holidays, so I don't get sued by the ACLU and get thrown in jail.--Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 18:53, 9 December 2006 (UTC)

Sadly, it's not just the <airquotes>comedian</airquotes> Larry L'homme De Cable. An unfortunate side effect of religion-overdose is the brain ceases to focus on important matters (national debt, healthcare, education, sex education, etc) but instead goes apeshit on stuff that doesn't matter (gay marriage, no sex education, gay marriage, replacing Darwin in school with the "real scientifical" literal enterpretation of the Bible, and of course, gay marriage). Just look at lovely Afghanistan in the 90's for probably the ultimate example (beating women unconscious for showing ankle, while the road she was walking on crumbles...)...but it's christmas, so we don't need to think about stuff like that right now (oh, shit! I'm late for my evil secularist cult meeting!) --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 21:27, 9 December 2006 (UTC)

Yeah they cannot start the Evil Atheist Conspiracy without you. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 04:05, 10 December 2006 (UTC)

Nah, you may build Jesus action figures and not Muhammad ones. Do you know... that fundie morons once tried to forbid Christmas celebrations because of their pagan origins? That's history, pal, serious! Merry Christmas, or John Lennon's birthday, that bearded hippie, dunno. herr doktor needsAsample  [scream!] 21:38, 9 December 2006 (UTC)

I have a Muhammad action figure, but it is colored invisible so as to not offend Muslims. I just forgot where I put it, and darned if I cannot see where it is now. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 04:05, 10 December 2006 (UTC)

I prefer "Merry Newtonmas", as I'm a fan of figs.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 21:44, 9 December 2006 (UTC)

I am a big fan of Apple Newtons, until Apple Computers sued Nabisco over the name and they had to be removed from the market. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 04:05, 10 December 2006 (UTC)

Please nothing like Atheist Communists putting people into concentration camps because of religious beliefs and stealing wealth from Conservative Jewish Russians during the Russian Revolution that removed Religion from their nation. I mean that is what secular humanism is all about, the destruction of religion and religious people, for the good of humanity. Just trust Richard Dawkins when he says religion is dangerous and that religion should be removed from the world by any means necessary for the good of humanity. Atheist Communism only murdered 300 million people in less than one hundred years, let's give it another chance! This is the season, after all, to really cut loose and be human and follow natural selection instead of religion. Unless you want to be Atheist Christians or something and admire Jesus for his philosophy for peace and goodwill? --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 03:39, 10 December 2006 (UTC)

That was atheism as dogma, not secular humanism...and if it came down to his way, or Ratzinger's, which would you choose? But I think we've drifted from whatever the subject of this forum is. Oh, yes...No, powershot, your pages aren't that great. There. I told 'em.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 04:47, 10 December 2006 (UTC)

I am a Ninja Christian! I follow neither path you describe. When you talk about Fundamental Christians, I am not even one of them. Sure you can talk and argue and debate, but what this world needs is action! I have struck a blow for humanity with some help from Chuck Norris and exposed what secular humanism is really all about, and how atheists control the Illuminati and pose as religious leaders in various nations in the world. Did you know that Jesus is really a Ninja? Mel Gibson had his turn with the Fundamentalist version of the Bible, but the Ninja version of the Bible is a whole lot more interesting with more action sequences. Some of us Ninja Christians joined Pirate Christians in the Ninja-Pirate Assembly of God but I am a Pirate Ninja. I wrote an article on Pirate Ninja Jesus, but it got deleted during a Forrest Fire week because it was too truthful and thus not funny. Lucky for me other Pirate Ninjas rewrote the article. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 06:02, 10 December 2006 (UTC)

No Winter Holidays, Period

I happen to live in Hawaii, where snow does not exist. Winter does not exist here, either. On my side of the island, in fact, there is no weather at all. Every day is a study in solar radiation poisoning. Because of this, I am mortally offended by ANY reference to winter or seasonal holidays, and I think everyone should respect that. Anything that suggests celebration in association with weather colder than 20 degrees Celsius (68 Fahrenheit for my fellow Americans) should be removed from the wiki. Anything less than total respect for my seasonally-challenged lifestyle will be considered an act of aggression, and the American Civil Liberties Union already has its gun turrets aimed in this direction. You have twenty minutes to comply. --The Acceptable  Cainad  (Fnord) 06:47, 21 December 2006 (UTC)

LOL...sorry...not really --HP talk 06:21, 30 December 2006 (UTC)

I AM OFFENDED BY SEEING HOLIDAYS THAT AREN'T BENSONMAS

Rejoice, rejoice, BENSON CLAUS is coming to town!

RECTIFY THIS NOW BEFORE I DECLARE JIHAD. --User:Nintendorulez 21:26, 21 December 2006 (UTC)

And what will you declare Jihad on? Your obsessiveness on Benson? Making an attempt to write even better articles? Getting more articles featured? Finally getting over a certain incident? You have to be more specific. --KWild 03:29, 22 December 2006 (UTC)

Shhhhh.... It's christmas. -- 10:46, 22 December 2006 (UTC)

So? --KWild 12:49, 22 December 2006 (UTC)

She'll cry. --—Braydie 12:53, 22 December 2006 (UTC)

Oh --KWild 13:17, 22 December 2006 (UTC)

DO YOU DARE INSULT BENSON! HOW DARE YOU INSULT MY RELIGION AND MY SAVIOR WHO IS BETTER THAN YOU! --User:Nintendorulez 22:18, 22 December 2006 (UTC)

NIN, THEY'LL UNDERSTAND US SOME DAY. Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 23:12, 22 December 2006 (UTC)

Nin, technically I am not insulting your religion because you are technically in a Cult of Personality but until I am smote by this "BENSON" I will continue to think like this --KWild 05:42, 23 December 2006 (UTC)

THE THIRD COMING OF BENSON WILL BE ON JANUARY 7. UNTIL THEN, YOU'LL HAVE TO BE PATIENT, KWILD. HE WILL PWN YOU AND YOU TOO WILL SOON BE BELIEVING THAT BENSON IS BETTER THAN YOU AND WILL SOON BE SPEAKING IN ALL CAPS. Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 05:57, 23 December 2006 (UTC)

Ha! BENSON, pwning? Yeha right, only Ouroboros pwns, heathen! I demand you coem to the Sunset Plaza at 6:00 pm, this Thursday, and see who the real deity is! --Señor DiZtheGreat  CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 21:56, 24 December 2006 (UTC)

I had a vision, Benson comes back January 7th and brings with him Windows Vista signaling the end of humanity and civilization as we know it! --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 12:36, 24 December 2006 (UTC)

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...... -- 10:17, 23 December 2006 (UTC)

Look what we have done. Sorry. And now to you Crazyswordsman. I will wait until Jan 7. And after that date I will NOT be speaking in caps. --KWild 13:41, 23 December 2006 (UTC)

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.

After all the death, war, hatred, intolerance, greed, and genocide perpetrated in the name of one god or another, I'd rather have my brain eaten by our squiddy lord and master, than worship some psychopathic, neurotic, control freak.  Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN • Eh? • Oh! • UnTunes! •• I my cat! 13:46, 22 December 2006 (UTC)

Whew! /me wipes forehead. I thought that was Klingon, for a second.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 14:04, 22 December 2006 (UTC)

Yeah worse than all of the death, war, hatred, intolerance, greed, and genocide perpetrated in the name of atheism in one form of another. Since Chairman Mao and Joseph Stalin and other communist leaders don't believe in any god, and murdered over 300 million people in fewer than 100 years, it don't count because no religion was used to kill that many people and wage those sorts of wars. Remember that religion is bad, but atheism in all forms is good, even when it murders innocent people. But the innocent people murdered were religious in one way or another, so their deaths don't count. If atheists can blame all religions for the acts of a small amount of radical of extremist religious people, then we can blame all atheists for the acts of a small amount of radical and extremist atheists. 'Tis the season anyway, to ignore religious things like peace on Earth and goodwill to all, and try to claim that Jesus was an atheist philosopher. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 23:48, 24 December 2006 (UTC)

I think if you read TT's sentence again, you'll find that Mao and Stalin qualify as ...some psychopathic, neurotic, control freak. Atheism as state religion is just as bad as Template:Religion of your choice is (ideology over humanology is always a bad choice). And, again I beseech you, switch to decaf and cut the sweets.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 03:22, 25 December 2006 (UTC)

Well then I guess there is no true atheism then. Everyone has a bit of "psychopathic, neurotic, control freak" including people who call themselves Christians, Atheists, and even Nihilists. Sorry I don't drink coffee and I am borderline diabetic so I can't eat sweets either. Nothing like my schizo affective disorder acting up this time of year because of all the stress that liberals and atheists have put on me with email telling me to kill myself or threatening to kill me this time of year. Which proves that they are not true atheists because they have a bit of "psychopathic, neurotic, control freak" in them. Sorry about my ranting but someone claimed that the Neocons were Bogarting Jesus and refused to share him or something. As a result I went without a Jesus fix for a while, until I found the place those Neocons held Jesus hostage at, and I rescued Jesus, like that group asked me too. I am a moderate Christian, and not a liberal Christian, and I felt kind of left out when they forgot to ask for the help of moderate Christians to fight the fundamentalist Christians who happen to be right-winger. I mean Atheists for Jesus seem to acknowledge that Jesus exists and also does not exist at the same time. Then they go into some sort of "psychopathic, neurotic, control freak" rant, that triggers some rants of my own on the subject. I get sort of this way almost every holiday, or it could be a bad phase of the moon again, or maybe conservatives really did hijack Jesus and I was unable to get my Jesus fix and I went into withdraws and thus it explains my behaviors and actions recently. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 04:16, 25 December 2006 (UTC)

Do'Ha'. TlhIngan Hol vIjatlhlaHbe'.  Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN • Eh? • Oh! • UnTunes! •• I my cat! 14:44, 22 December 2006 (UTC)

I have a call from Mr. Cthulhu...will you accept the charges from the realm of Madness and Despair? Rad 16:02, 22 December 2006 (UTC)

That's a local call for me.  Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN • Eh? • Oh! • UnTunes! •• I my cat! 07:57, 24 December 2006 (UTC)

Err...

Who reset the poll? --KWild 05:44, 23 December 2006 (UTC)

Any time an option is added it gets reset. I archived the old polls here. --User:Nintendorulez 15:24, 23 December 2006 (UTC)

Odd, when I was little my dad would give me ten bucks and he'd say, "Go see a movie or something. Your mother and I are going to archive the old poll". Then mom start to giggle. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 22:40, 23 December 2006 (UTC)

I've said it before, and I'll probably have to say it again: You're a sick, sick puppy, Modus!  Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN • Eh? • Oh! • UnTunes! •• I my cat! 07:57, 24 December 2006 (UTC)

What about...

Chrishanukkwaanzastice? --Sir gwax (talk) 00:53, 26 December 2006 (UTC)

I find it offensive to try and put that many holidays in one word. Now I have to endlessly bitch about it, start several forum topics on it, and vandalize it. --User:Nintendorulez 17:23, 26 December 2006 (UTC)

That is it, you win the prize! Ding ding ding, we have a winnah! The Admins would ban you, but you'd probably just use proxy servers and library computers to get around the bans and blockings. We need an Anonymous Slashy themed award for these kind of things. :) --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 18:51, 26 December 2006 (UTC)

You mean like UGotM?--<<>> 23:49, 26 December 2006 (UTC)

No no no, UGotM is only for those who constantly write crap. We need a different one, but like it, for those who endlessly bitch about things, start several forum topics on it, and vandalize articles and forum posts. Using proxies and slashes are optional, but it will help you get more votes for the Slashy award. Yes I said it, we need to start giving out the Slashy Award. After all, how are you going to deal with obvious children like that, try to use some Child Psychology on them? That never works and it only annoys them even more. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 02:40, 27 December 2006 (UTC)

FOR -- 17:23, 27 December 2006 (UTC)

So... we are going to award people who come on this site and bitch about stuff? --—Braydie 17:24, 27 December 2006 (UTC)

Why not? Anything to shut them up. Thank you Anonymous User, here is your Slashy Award for all of your bitching and vandalizing and blanking you did at our site, as well as the many forum topics you created. I mean they will go "WTF? Did they just give me an award?" and usually this type of user has an IQ of 60, and it takes a while for them to figure out, that the award is only given to users who exhibit bad behavior. Then we just put up a "Pwn3d" template on their user page, and block their IP address. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 23:17, 27 December 2006 (UTC)

Sweet. --User:Nintendorulez 23:18, 27 December 2006 (UTC)

Although thinking about it, it should probably only be given to really persistent vandals - the psychology thing you were talking about, although it sounds like bollocks, really can help if it's done without malicious intent. If nothing else, it means they just go away instead of keeping trying to vandalise the site as some kind of 'revenge' for the humiliation, whereas if we just ban-em-and-tag-em it has the opposite effect. If we do use the award, it should only be a last resort. -- 23:40, 27 December 2006 (UTC)

I agree, only as a last resort, and only to the most annoying users, those that most cosely resemble the actions and behaviors of Anonymous Slashy should get the Slashy Award. I admit there are few users like that, and most of them do not even qualify for such an award. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 19:07, 28 December 2006 (UTC)