Black helicopter

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The legendary Black Helicopter.

Black Helicopter, not to be confused with the new gender of "attack helicopter", was a larger-than-life personality from the mid-2410's. Black Helicopter was an internet personality, game, talk show host, inventor of the time machine, had the ability to fly, and was a raging racist. His antics would get him into so much trouble with the likes of Wiley Coyote, Bugs Bunny, and Daffy Duck. After the October massacre known only as "Spooky's eve", Black Helicopter began taking his medication again and was able to finally defeat his arch-nemesis: Dementia.

Early Life[edit | edit source]

The Black Helicopter had a lonely childhood, with only a few Ospreys as friends. When the young chopper was able to join a school, he did splendidly, becoming captain of the swim team by 5th grade. (It is worth mentioning that the Black Helicopter eventually became fearful of the water, as he had been bullied while in the pool.) The Black Helicopter then graduated into high school, where he truly would have taken flight, had it not been for the draft.

Military Career[edit | edit source]

The Black Helicopter was present for the battle of New Orleans, the raid on Area 51, the Raid of the Vatican, and many other bloody war efforts. After getting wounded in an amphibious assault on the ear canal of the square root of Jack Rabbit's coyote, the Black Helicopter was awarded a Purple Heart and nominated for the Medal of Honor for his efforts. However, not everyone saw the Black Helicopter as a hero, including the numerous ducks that were caught in his crosshairs from time to time. Upon his return to domestic soil, the Black Helicopter became the main target of many cults and hate groups, as they apparently thought that the Black Helicopter was the most important issue, despite the fact that most of these groups were still slave-owning racists.

Life after the war[edit | edit source]

After being discharged from the Savage Commandos, an elite black-ops unit sent deep in the Peruvian jungles, Black Helicopter began to use his Native American heritage to help the needy, you know, morons. He became the first and only positive Native American role model EVER, mainly because of his inability to get drunk. This power came in handy when he was tortured via an alcoholic waterboard.

Death[edit | edit source]

The untimely death of Black Helicopter can be seen as tragic, but he went out doing what he loved: himself. That is right, he died while in the middle of a session of playing the skin flute. Wax on, wack off. Bop the bologna. You get it.