User talk:Alfred

Are you going to contribute anything worthwhile, or are you just going to spam other people's Talk pages? --Rcmurphy 00:52, 28 Jul 2005 (UTC)

What Rc is gently hinting at is that if you continue to act like an ass and spam people's user pages, you will get banned. Rather than running around like a small child (virtually) shouting "look at me", you need to actually create something worthwhile if you want to stay here. If you can't make useful contributions to this website, you will be huffed.

Hell, since I'm in a somewhat irritatble mood at the moment, let me provide you with a special ultimatum: if you drop any more stupid crap on this website, I'll treat you to a special session with my ban stick. Especially if you ever, ever drop another "Come to my page!" bit of spammyness on anyone's user page. That is god damned stupid. HAND. --Famine 03:14, 28 Jul 2005 (UTC)

Dear Alfred:

Uncyclopedia is not your personal LiveJournal. It is a parody of an encyclopedia. If you would like to add to this un-cyclopedia you are more than welcome to. In fact, we encourage it. However, if all you do is make messes on people's user pages, it does not help us, nor make us happy. And when people start talking about banning you due to spamming user pages, it is incredibly, amazingly, stupendously stupid to go dump stupid crap on their user pages. So, due to you being incredibly clueless, I'm tagging you with the banstick for a few days. Take a breather. Think about life. Go outside. Read Uncyclopedia and get a feel for how articles look.

AND STOP SPAMMING USER PAGES!!!!!

Thank you. --Famine 02:42, 19 Aug 2005 (UTC)

Help at Last!!!

By the way, you might want to read this nice guide before you make too many more edits. It might help with your "I'm a sneeze away from being banned again and everyone's watching me" problem. --Famine 01:25, 28 Aug 2005 (UTC)

Votes of Highlight (pictures and articles)

The vote pages contain botht those being voted on and those that have already "won" (under the archive heading) It's generaly not worth voting for those that have already won (although for features images it should in theory affect the weighting they recieve for random display), Also new nominations should go in the list above the archive in alphabetical order (I've already moved you nomination there for you). Good Luck--The Right Honourable Maj Sir Elvis UmP KUN FIC MDA VFH Bur. CM and bars UGM F@H (Petition) 12:59, 4 Sep 2005 (UTC)