User:YesTimeToEdit/mafia/message
Dear Valued Mafia Member,[edit | edit source]
Dear Valued Mafioso,
I am very sorry to be encroaching on your talkpage. Please feel free to move this message without incurring the wrath of the mob. You are, whether you remember or not, a member of the Uncyclopedia Mafia. Unfortunately, due to unforeseen circumstances, the Family has been inactive recently. However, members of the Family believe that now is the time for our little business to burst back into the spotlight.
Mafia 2.0 promises:
- MORE violence
- MORE whores
- MORE gambling
- MORE guns
- MORE pointless awards
- MORE positions to be filled
- MORE of an actual purpose
The Mafia Pledge:
The Uncyclopedia mafia hereby declares its intention to be a family business dedicated to welcoming, socialising with and being friendly to new users, in an attempt to integrate them into the Uncyclopedia community, offering help to any Uncyclopedia user who wants assistance and looking to promote merriment within the Uncyclopedia community.
As a current member we are proposing that you should help the Family, once more, by becoming an active member. We humbly present you with the following options:
- Simply reply here, saying you are willing to continue being a member of the Mafia.
- Sign the code {{u|<insert name here>}} here to opt out of the Mafia.
- If you do not reply within ten (10) days you will deemed inactive and stripped of your current full Mafia membership.
- Reply here saying you are willing to continue as part of the Mafia and then request one of the several senior roles within the Mafia that need filling at my office.
As of the following roles within the Mafia require filling. If you would like one of the positions please request it at the above mentioned office.
- Personal Secretary to the Don (with special privileges)
- Capo Bastone (deputy to the Don)
- Chariman of the Italian branch of the family
- Capo Bastone Delegato (deputy to the Capo Bastone)
Yours Sincerely,
Don Mr. Antonio "Snowmobile" Yettie
[18:29 7 August 2010]