User:Tagstit/Cardboard Box

The single greatest achievement in tactical military equipment.

The Cardboard Box is the latest advancement in the field of tactical military equipment. With the country in debt and much of our funds being spent on expensive guns and explosives, a less costly tool for combat has been searched for. Developers have spent years of long days and late nights inventing something to help our soldiers, but without spending too much money.

The result is a light, easy to use cubical structure constructed completely of cardboard. The material needed is cheap, yet the design of the tool is so innovative that it has multiple uses. The United States army has looked into the Cardboard Box intensely and have reported that they are quite impressed with its simplicity combined with its many uses. Not only is it light, cheap, and useful, it also has different mode settings, variations, and customization options.

Modes

One of the greatest features of the new Cardboard Box is that it has many different modes and variations. The first one presented was the "Down" mode. To activate the "Down" mode, simply flip it so that the open side is facing the floor. In the "Down" mode, it acts as a sort of cloaking device. By putting something under it, it covers the object and gives the impression nothing is there! The only limit is that it has to be smaller than the box. Experts have even tested putting humans under the box to give the impression they are not there! It's lightness allows the user to move by just lifting up slightly when under the box, and using their legs to walk forward. The military has already considered using this for sneaking in and listening to enemy meetings, battlefield cover, and even assassinations!

In the "Up" position, boxes can even trap animals, such as this one, which has seemed to have caught a cat.

The second mode presented was the "Up" mode. To turn on the "Up" mode, just turn the box upward so that the open side is facing upward! Pretty simple. Now it can be carried easiest and most comfortably. Additionally, the box in the "Up" mode can hold other various objects as well such as books, papers, and even computers! The only real limit to what you can put in there is the limit of your imaginations (and it has to be smaller than the box in size as well).

Another mode that has only slightly been looked into, is the "Flat" mode. This is where you detach all the parts of the box from the sides so that it lays out flat. Although not many uses have been found yet, inventors have discovered it can be used as a very weak protection from gun fire, as well as an uncomfortable bed.

With all these modes currently available, you are probably really excited to hear that more modes are being discovered everyday! A designer states, "When an owner sees their Cardboard Box, we want to give them the feeling that anything is possible."

Variations

Now that you know what a box is, and see its amazingness, your probably thinking, EVERYONE is going to have this. How can I make mine unique and special? Well, designers have developed a way to directly put in a sense of personality into the Cardboard Box system. This is in the form of stickers and drawings on the box.

The owner of this box has chosen to customize his Box in a way to warn others that it contains fragile things.

For example, say you want to carry something fragile in your Box in the "Up" mode. Well simply slap a sticker of a glass with a crack in the middle on it to let people know. Or, if you want your box to be in one particular mode all the time, simply slap an arrow sticker pointing up or down, which ever one you choose! Another sticker option is to put a "TOP SECRET" sticker on it, so that people will not look in it! Information on how to obtain packs of box stickers have not been released, but are expected to run around $3000 a pack.

Now for the painting. Painting supplies will be offered and can be purchased separately for about $4500. It is said to include a paintbrush, three different colors of paint, and a pack of colored pencils. Many paint jobs have already been modeled, some to camoflauge, like a rock or the color of a tree. Others are going for a more sporty look, such as a flame or a skull on the side.

Military Use

One artist's depiction of what destruction by cardboard box would look like.

The Cardboard Box has raised much debate among the military. For example, one war general has stated, "It is just a cardboard box, it fails to provide any further assistance to our troops and is pointless." While others, such as George W. Bush are quite impressed by this invention, as shown by his statement, "I for one support the new Cardboard Box program. When people come in to talk to me about something stupid I have done, I just hide in my new Cardboard Box and they never find me, lets see a gun do that."

At this current time those in the U.S. army are turning in their guns and missles issued to them earlier, and in exchange, are receiving the new Cardboard Box, one per person. What is even better, is that the United States is making money from selling its no longer needed missles and high tech guns to countries such as Russia and Iraq in order to pay off some of the countries debt.

Other Facts

Boxes are saving people all around the world, and even putting out fires.

While this first started as a military program, the cheapness and many uses of the Cardboard Box have turned the heads of many people. Homeowners are now using them as a place to store things for long periods of time. Children are receiving them for Christmas gifts and using them for games of hide-n-seek. Even the homeless have checked into the new craze! Using them as a home themselves!

Advancements are being made all the time as well, and people are discovering new uses on their own. Customization can turn them into nearly anything and with enough time and creativity, can function as nearly anything as well! They have been made into Boxcopters, HoverBoxes, and even Box Fire Engines! With all the opportunities this new invention have opened up, can you afford NOT to look into one? Check into one today!