User:Nezlr/water
Ah yes. The relationship between these two arch-nemeses has existed since the beginning of time One decided to mug the other one. Since then, both water and fire have been long at war.
Theorem[edit | edit source]
The water-fire theorem is a fact based on one of the few logical facts anybody actually knows any more, and that is that you cannot light a fire under water, nor can either of the two be next to the other without one huffing the other.
Firewater[edit | edit source]
Fire-water is the biggest known non-existent creation on God's list of things not to create...although, sadly, his drunk elf minions mixed up this list, resulting in many creations that should not have been made in the first place. Anyway, Firewater, not to be confused with vodka, is, well, self exlanatory. This is, of course, not physically possible in this dimension, because of many different reasons.
One[edit | edit source]
The temperature. lets see, water is between 33 and 211 degrees fahrenheit, and fire is at least 451 degrees.
“451 is more than 211!”
...Yeah.
Two[edit | edit source]
Matter. Water is a liquid. It is everywhere on the Earth, and 95% of it is free. Fire is comprised of gas, energy, and plasma. thus, it costs 5$ for a gallon of fire. Once again: What the shit. considering Water is everywhere on Earth and almost nowhere off of it excluding Uranus, and fire is everywhere, but very rare on earth itself.
Three[edit | edit source]
They hate eachother. Water is the bastard who exists in about .0000000000001% of the known universe. Fire is everywhere. Face it. Fire mugged, gangraped, and left water for dead. Theres no way either of the two could ever have a reaction without one of them dying.
Epic Battles and Struggles to Coexist[edit | edit source]
Since water was created a long time ago by the Big BangJesus His noodliness, the battle of fire and water has been a long and hard one. They will never touch each other without instantly killing eachother.
Fighting Fire with Water[edit | edit source]
The most well known of the coexistence. People have used water to fight fires for years (take that, you assholes)! Basically, water is the first thing that that cave man decided "Oh my god, my foots on fire! This stuff will save me!" aas he doeses his foot with about 40 different things before water worked (retard). Basically, without water, Earth would be on fire.
Fighting Water with Fire[edit | edit source]
Are you fucking retarded? Seriously. Fire does nothing but destroy and completely huff anything it can get its greedy little hands on. Why would you want to destroy water, a substance absolutely needed to sustain life? Thats like using stupidity to kill intelligence...
Fighting Fire with Fire[edit | edit source]
This makes no sense using a fire to put out a fire. Wouldn't that just make the fire bigger? Why not just hire Osama Bin Laden to suicide bomb Osama Bin Laden? see, makes abso-fuckin-lutely no sense.
Fighting Water with Water[edit | edit source]
Okay, now this is just getting ridiculous.
Oil[edit | edit source]
Lets face it, everything people say about Oil or Petroleum being easily flammable and capable of causing a paradox on a level that Bush or Switzerland hasn't yet is nothing more than complete bollocks. Face it, Oil is made from a liquid. Water and Oil don't have to like each other like some over-the-top gay couple, but everyone knows Oil is not flammable.
But mister! Gasoline is made from oil and it is very flammable!
No, that is absolutely incorrect. for you see, oil is a liquid. What do you use to put fires out? Don't go giving me the utter bullcrap, because the only things that can put a fire out is a liquid, whether it be water, or that semi-liquid cold whipped cream stuff they put in fire extinguishers. A liquid being flammable makes about as much sense as the George Bush administration.
Summary[edit | edit source]
Summary: Water and Fire will always hate eachother. End of story.
