User:High General Grue/combat

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
This menu looks like a telescope. It is a telescope.

Archive 1

So you want to join the Grue Army? You need to beat someone else in this game!

Soilders in training:

Weapons Available: Knife x3, Your own teeth xinfinity, Pistols x5, AK-47 x3, Sniper Rifle x1, strangle xinfinity, light cannon x1, Eat xHan

Training zones:

  • Zone F1: Jungle <vacant>
  • Zone F2: Beach <vacant>
  • Zone F3: Desert <vacant>
  • Zone F4: Glaicial <vacant>
  • Zone F5: Urban <vacant>
  • Zone F6: Wizard's Tower <vacant>
  • Zone FU: FUCK YOU! <vacant>
  • Zone UN: Uncyclopedian's Rules <1 battle>
  • Zone OC: Ouroboros Chapel <vacant>
  • Zone F7: Grueland City <vacant>
  • Zone UL: Ultimate Zone <vacant>
  • Zone ZZ: Dream Zone <vacant>
  • Zone SK: Shrunken Zone <vacant>
  • Zone UC: Uncyclopedia <vacant>
  • Zone F8: British Columbia, Canada <1 battle>


Battle 2[edit | edit source]

Han vs. Uncyclopedian
Zone:F7+UN: Grueland City, Uncyclopedian's Rules
Light Level:
   Grueslayer       VS.  Officer Ronalds
HP:0/200 MSP:200/200   
HP:193/200 MSP: 140/160
Equipment:Fist (10), AK-47 (15), basic supersuit(flight, immunity to bullets), poisoned sword(15 damage plus 10 per turn), minor spellbook(Conjure Splinter, Summon Wikipedian, Minor Snow Bolt, Summon Agent U, 20 health heal, Give opponent spell and learn opponent spell also known as knowledge trade, Summon Sir Uncyclopedia), coolness(5 MSP gained per every two turns), medipack(100 damage heal), Pistol(15 damage), steak(11 damage)            Equipment:fist (10), strangle (5), sniper rifle (100 if not seen, 15 if seen), sword (15), dagger with poison(10 damage if seen, 20 if not, plus 5 damage per turn), medipack(Heals 50 damage), supersuit(Grues are ineffective against this suit, missiles dealing 500 damage usable twice only, armor blocking 75 damage each shot, flight, immune to winds and crashes, immune to disasters, overpowered, immune to Australian animals, immune to lightning, immune to nature, immune to fire, immune to water, immune to heavy weapons, almost bulletproof, immune to explosions, huge oxygen supply), splinter(1 point of damage to holder per turn), spellbook(Summon Sir Uncyclopedia, Magic Missile, Teleport, Anti-Grue Shield, Give opponent spell and learn opponent spell also known as knowledge trade, control events, 20 health heal, Summon Agent U, Summon Grueologist), police uniform, silver key, Grueslayer toilet water, rope, gag, sword(20 damage), grue room key. 
1. Splinter.  Ow.  I fly to Grueland, and become known as Officer Ronalds.
Holy shit. That's a lot of items.
2. Also, since i'm the Grueslayer, I need to win to advance the Storyline.
3. I cast GOSALOSAKAKT to give GOSALOSAKAKT and get 20 health heal.  I get rope, gag, and sword.  I also get the ket to the Grue Room.
4. Han, you have more stuff than the Grueslayer did, and you are supposed to have all this stuff.  Because you are slow, I am casting GOSALOSAKAKT to give Summon Sir Uncyclopedia and get Summon Agent U.
5. Wow, still stalling?  I research spell Summon Grueologist.
6. I am bored. I examine the Grue in the corner.
***You, the mighty Grueslayer, Have Died***
7. You will respawn in the next turn.  Ow.
8. I am bored. I examine the Grue in the corner.
***You, the mighty Grueslayer, Have Died***

Battle 3[edit | edit source]

 vs. Uncyclopedian
Zone:F8+UN: British Columbia, Canada, Uncyclopedian's Rules
Light Level:
          VS.  Uncyclopedian
HP:0/200 MSP:200/200   
HP:199/200 MSP: 140/160
Equipment:Fist (10), AK-47 (15), basic supersuit(flight, immunity to bullets), poisoned sword(15 damage plus 10 per turn), minor spellbook(Conjure Splinter, Summon Wikipedian, Minor Snow Bolt, Summon Agent U, 20 health heal, Give opponent spell and learn opponent spell also known as knowledge trade, Summon Sir Uncyclopedia), coolness(5 MSP gained per every two turns), medipack(100 damage heal), Pistol(15 damage), steak(11 damage)            Equipment:fist (10), strangle (5), sniper rifle (100 if not seen, 15 if seen), sword (15), dagger with poison(10 damage if seen, 20 if not, plus 5 damage per turn), medipack(Heals 50 damage), supersuit(Grues are ineffective against this suit, missiles dealing 500 damage usable twice only, armor blocking 75 damage each shot, flight, immune to winds and crashes, immune to disasters, overpowered, immune to Australian animals, immune to lightning, immune to nature, immune to fire, immune to water, immune to heavy weapons, almost bulletproof, immune to explosions, huge oxygen supply), splinter(1 point of damage to holder per turn), spellbook(Summon Sir Uncyclopedia, Magic Missile, Teleport, Anti-Grue Shield, Give opponent spell and learn opponent spell also known as knowledge trade, control events, 20 health heal, Summon Agent U, Summon Grueologist), police uniform, silver key, Grueslayer toilet water, rope, gag, sword(20 damage), grue room key. 
1. Splinter.  I hide in Gibsons.
2. <examine grue in corner
2.a ***You, the mighty Grueslayer, have died***
3. Hey, you still have health!  Not anymore.  (casts Conjure Splinter in your heart)
4. ***You, the mighty Grueslayer, have died***