User:High General Grue/combat/Archive 1

Battle 1 (Winner:Han Solo)

High General Grue vs. Uncyclopedian
Zone:F4: Glaicial
Light Level:Slightly Bright
Han Solo          VS.  Uncyclopedian
HP:infifity/infinity MSP:0/100          HP:0/1 MSP: 150/150
Equipment:Fist (10), AK-47 (15)            Equipment:fist (10), strangle (5), sniper rifle (100 if not seen, 15 if seen), sword (15), dagger with poison(10 damage if seen, 20 if not, plus 5 damage per turn), medipack(Heals 50 damage), supersuit(Grues are ineffective against this suit, missiles dealing 500 damage usable once only, armor blocking 75 damage each shot, flight, immune to winds and crashes, immune to disasters, overpowered, immune to Australian animals, immune to lightning, immune to nature, immune to fire, immune to water, immune to heavy weapons, almost bulletproof, immune to explosions, huge oxygen supply). 
1.*BANG*
Event:Light level increases
2. Uncyclopedian has not even gotten out of his plane yet.  U jumps out and hides(two turns to find me).
Event:Light increases. Exposure loses 10 HP per turn.
3. Takes 10 dmg, and hides in cave
4. Uncyclopedian does silent teleport, and uses light cannon.
5. Not enough MSP. MSP needed for teleport:250. *BANG* Plus, strangle does *5* damage. i should do a list of weapons.
Event:Light burns Uncyclopedian and High Gen. Grue/ both in the light
6. Uncyclopedian not grue, light cannon ineffective on Uncyclopedian.  Uncyclopedian calls in Sir Uncyclopedia, High General Grue obliderated.
7. Not enough MSP. Needed 150. Sowwy. *BANG* /me uses 100 msp to transfigure back to a human. Also, Humans replace Teeth with fist.
8. Calling in Sir Uncyclopedia is my specialty(I started the article).  I can summon him for 100 MSP.  I Win!
8. Uhh... I'm still a Grue General. Grues respect me. I shoot Sir Uncyclopedia. Health: 0/15. (Summons have 15 health, if you win, more MSP is aded to your total with a higher  max.)
9. I am sorry, but Sir Uncyclopedia becomes a highly powerful ghost.  Sir Uncyclopedia uses light cannon.
10. YAWN. I'm a human right now. *BANG* Besides, Sir Uncyclopedia is non-corporeal, and therefore can't do damage.
Event:Light level decreases
11. Sir Uncyclopedia instills me with his power.  I PWN YOU, and get healed to full health.
12. Seance. The GHOST IS NULL AND VOID! *BANG*
13. I call in plane, and get on, and pilot takes off.  Plus, that costs no MSP.  I eat and eat and eat.  I rest.
Event:Hurricane
14. Plane crashes and Han Solo fires into the wreckage. You lose your Sniper.
15. Gets into jet.  Jet takes off.  Jet is faster than bullets this time. I get healed and get new equipment and training.
16. *AHEM* Hurricane. Idiot. Plane crashes (again) And the plane crashes into a mountain, 30 miles from the battle site. Winds too strong for aircraft. Health drops by 5 for every turn you walk in the endless snow.
Event:Hurricane stops.  Permanantly.  No hurricanes are going to occur.  You used up your disaster.
17. Gets into jet.  Jet takes off.  Jet is faster than bullets this time, and is immune to wind. I get healed and get new equipment and training.  HA!
18. Lightning strikes twice. Then the plane crashes into another plane. Boom. Planes explodes into crevasse a plane cannot get into there. Crevasse is to deep to climb. Arms, and legs are broken. you die of hunger, blood loss, and being an idiot. Mother Nature must hate you. Wreckages block only entrance. Smoldering wreckege falls on you.
19. You already used your only disaster.  18 fails to happen.  Jet drops Anti-Gruebot piloted by the Zork 3 player.  Boom.
20. Guess what? Evant:Hurricane ends didn't happen. You die. C'mon. You are in a CREVASSE. Nobody EVER comes out from a crevasse.
21. Ahem.  The hurricane ended ages ago.  20 fails to happen.  The Anti-Gruebot is still down there.  You will respawn in three turns.  I never ended up in the crevasse.  I get a new supersuit, get out of jet(not safe with you around), and fly off to Australia.
22. Only I control events to make up for your cheating. also,Event:World explodes. Han Solo is now on Corellia.
23. You have not respawned yet, sorry.  You will respawn in two turns. You can't control events when dead.  Live with it.
24. ADMIT DEFEAT. I won anyway. Feel free to start a new battle.