User:Funnybony/Bad Nigger Attitude
Bad Nigger Attitude (BNA) is a fascinating genetic aberration that quite possibly came into existence when genes harvested from a belligerent caveman's tooth were sexually crossed with the DNA of a sloth. Before the resulting anomaly could be studied, however, it was spirited deep into the African jungle by mad scientists hell-bent on creating a new brand of annoyance. These careless lunatics transmutated the hybrid gene into a form which they christened BNA (having simply replaced "D" with "B")[1]. Subsequently their experiments were considered a success in the fields of intermittent explosive disorder, chronic languor syndrome, and professional sports, music & dance. However, such genetic fandango was not without the side-effect of playing into the hands of the feckless fate - because soon this highly contagious BNA infected many of the local natives who, through forced immigration in the guise of overseas job placement, led to an American phenomena which persists even now.
BNA genetics[edit | edit source]
Over View[edit | edit source]
BNA is not a racial gene any more than Polio is a Polish gene or insanity is an insane gene, and it is not confined to Melanin-excessive individuals. But because BNA originated in Africa, people brought from Africa to America originally carried the BNA Gene. While most other blacks transformed from sold slaves into free super-human African-American basketball players, crack dealers, pimps, musicians, entertainers, Secretaries of State, and President, still, those with BNA have only devolved[2].
Roots[edit | edit source]
When God created Adam and Eve, He also created King Kong and Fay Wray. God first put Adam & Eve in the Garden of Eden, and then put King Kong and Fay Wray into the Garden of Africa. He named these creatures as Man/Woman and Homeboy/Bitch respectively. In turn, Adam was tempted by an apple, and Homeboy was tempted by a papaya. Life was good and all was well until madmen, desirous of creating a new genre of humor, or something, developed and introduced BNA into the jungle [Citation not needed at all; thank you very much].
Discovery[edit | edit source]
Discovered accidentally by Dr. Jane Watts-Compton, these infected savages led by Tarzan, were soon ruthlessly subdued, tamed, taught to walk upright, ghetto-trained, and shipped to America as slaves. But because slavery was illegal in America, Jane and Tarzan were arrested for 'Human Trafficking', and the infected slaves were freed immediately upon arrival in the USA. Little did medical science know that this thoughtless immigration would eventually infect vulnerable people throughout the United States with BNA, spreading orally like Ear Herpes.
Freedom[edit | edit source]
Although the infected slaves were freed, they had no way home, nowhere to go, and nothing to do. They had nothing to do because slaves don't work for money. It's a Catch 22 because by law businesses must pay the Africans minimum wage, but slaves only labor for free. And they couldn't be deported back to Africa because they had become African-American nationals. Thus taking full advantage of this legal predicament the BNA infected natives became their own burden. Running around idle, these unwitting carriers spread the gene far and wide.
Bad Nigger Attitude is opposite of African American Attitude[edit | edit source]
African American Attitude is white when compared to Bad Nigger Attitude. Examples: Colin Powell, Sammy Davis Jr., and Barak Obama have an African-American attitude that’s white as Angel-food cake; but Eminem, Charles Manson, and OJ Simpson are examples of BNA that’s black as Devil’s Food Cake.
Example of Good Attitude[edit | edit source]
“Yaosir, Mista Benny!”
Rochester is at the top of the good attitude list, followed by every other equal or lesser person, who cooperates with society without grabbing their crotch and exclaiming, Suck my dick, masta![3]
Example of Bad Attitude[edit | edit source]
“I want to kill people. I want to rip their stomachs out and eat their children!”
Mike Tyson was once upon a time a professional at the top of the BNA list. Although at present Iron Mike has found a new calling as speech coach to former President Dubya Bush. At the very bottom of the BNA list is Tyrone. Tyrone has a Bad Nigger Attitude no one wants to deal with, especially African Americans.
GNA (BNA cure)[edit | edit source]
In a 50 year study made on one black man who originally tested positive for BNA, Dr. Abraham Washington Jefferson has demonstrated that simply changing the atomic structure of BNA, by replacing B with G, thus creating GNA, the result was an African-American with such good attitude and demeanor to be able to mesmerize the entire planet, receive the Nobel Prize in advance, trick the anti-war left into being pro-war, openly codify and exceed all the excesses of the Bush era dystopian doctrine, help over-throw secular Middle East countries on behalf of hard-line Islamic dictatorships, grant infinite potential to the FED, pardon Wall Street banksters, raise over a $1,000,000,000 in renewable special interest campaign bribes, and further the United Nation's collectivist Agenda 21.