Uncyclopedia Legal Department/Complaints

Complaints

LEGAL COMPLAINTS CAN BE FILED ON THIS PAGE.

If you have a complaint - legitimate or otherwise - against anything or anyone on Uncyclopedia and/or in the whole world, you can file said complaint on this page. Be as precise as possible, and file all necessary contact details here along with your complaint. All discovery will be reviewed primum quam quantocius, and legal action will be initiated by the Department when appropriate. Be prepared to pay substantial fees.

It is at the discretion of the Attorney General, or an assigned member of the Department to enact proper legal proceedings, and the department is always mens sana in corpore sano.

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The Uncyclopedia Legal Department is well-endowed with a large team of experienced lawyers, who will do everything in their power to ensure you receive the best legal assistance possible.

"Sealed" complaints for pending cases

Paid Adversement*

I complain against the fact that I'm not actually paid for editing Uncyclopedia. I know nobody else is paid either, but it's me I'm talking about here!! DO YOU UNDERSTAND?? In fact I suspect somebody else is being paid. Guildy is so productive he might be! THERE IS NO JUSTICE IN THE WORLD. -- Style  Guide 09:43, December 8, 2009 (UTC)

I'd like to complain that Style  Guide makes more money than I do for editing Uncyclopedia! When will the endless legal fees stop?!? (Seriously though, why aren't you getting paid the two bits that Syndrome and I are?)  ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!*  (talk) (stalk) Π   ~  ~  05:14, December 10, 2009 (UTC)

I complain that you used my signature Happytimes! -- Style  Guide Date/time (UTC)

*Case Closed (02:42, December 16, 2009 (UTC)): Uncyclopedia Legal Department/Case:Happytimes vs Multiliteralist