Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Yasser Arafat

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Yasser Arafat

Humour:	5	I'm sorry, but I'm beginning to get tired of people taking a subject and putting in random humo(u)r for random's sake instead of for humo(u)r's sake. In this case, I mean things like the volcano reference in Arafat's birth and selling his body to fund the PLF. If you want to be random, it should be something that fits in well WITH the subject. Here, that would mean something in the history between Israel and Palestine, or something that happened in Arafat's life. In the case of making well-known people the main subject, the best bet is to make subtle, semi-truthful comedy about real events surrounding that person. (See Angelina Jolie as an example, especially the comparison chart between her and Jennifer Aniston.)
Concept:	4	Again, see above. The concept just seems to be "Take Arafat and put in random facts." I often make reference to Family Guy on articles like this. It too often seems that people try to base their comedy on this...when only Seth McFarlaine can pull it off. Try to make the story more coherent.
Prose and formatting:	5	There needs to be more division between the subjects instead of one long piece. Divide between sections using the = method, and it will be easier to read, especially if you add more comedy and fix the overall concept.
Images:	2	The one thing you have of Arafat could be very good if it had a funny caption. Besides that, this article needs one or two more pics (with funny captions) to make it more aluring. Make sure the pictures fit in well with the article itself.
Miscellaneous:	6	Lose the red links. Try either linking to similar subjects (like, say, linking Chihuahua to "dog" as an example) or simply eliminating the links on these words. You still have plenty on here to work well.
Final Score:	22	I don't know what else to say here that I haven't already. I hope this hasn't been too harsh, but when dealing with a person (especially as high-profile as Arafat was), the comedy, to me, works best when making fun of certain aspects of his/her life. Also, work to eliminate the use of randomness for random's sake.
Reviewer:	--Mr.Vib 16:27, 16 June 2007 (UTC)