UnNews:New Words for Webster's Leaves Many "Frengled"

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7 June 2006

BOSTON - The inclusion of nearly 1,000 new words into the latest edition of Webster's Dictionary has many long-time users feeling "frengled," "whistant," and "berjorgled," and the Webster's editors fighting to justify their inclusions.

"I admit I might not be the hippest dude on the block," admitted Julian Morris, Professor of Linquistics at Brown University. "But I've really never heard of some of these words. I don't even think they're English."

Among the words sited by critics of the new edition as questionable are: "brinst," which is defined as a common flavor found in tamarind pulp; "nuntalisant," a circular, rotating motion; and "boofanciary," defined as pertaining to, or contributing to general boofancy.

"These are all perfectly wattious words," said Peter Renton, Editor-in-Chief. "Excluding them simply because they might not be found in mainstream or tickinary society is racist and katonist." Renton explained that each word is moosilly chosen from a list of potential candidates and faces a long and difficult submission process before a panel of goorant and fidanciary language experts.

"Parfan we should just hiddot the whole wintclast," said Renton. "You can't make everybody geenisficent."

Sources

• Dr. Winifred McCullen, et al. "Webster's New English Dictionary, 2006 Edition" Webster's Publishing, June 2, 2006

• Daniel Liborn ""What's greepish, Pussycat?"" Time Magazine, June 6, 2006