UnNews:Nail varnish stolen from Police station

This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation.

17 April 2013

The last time the panda was seen since 1972.

Officers were so outraged that a tin nail varnish vanished from their police station that they reported it as an official crime.

Details of the theft are still unclear but it is thought a police officer could be responsible for an inside job at the station at Heavytree Road in Exeter, Devon.

"The nail varnish was last seen in the control room kitchen," said veteran Andrew Hills. "I remember, it was red, blood red, not brick red, and I was putting some on checking for illegal substances. I popped to the loo, and when I came back, it was gone."

The audacious crime at Devon and Cornwall Police's headquarters, right under officers' noses, was logged on February 28, 1954 - and remains officially unsolved.

The nail varnish were among a bizarre list of property recorded as stolen from police stations in Devon and Cornwall between 1950 and 2010

They include a lace dress, hair tongs, thong, Chief Jackson's eyeball, two vests and a panda.

12 canoes, a set of car keys and eight DVDs were also reported missing - but none of the 376 items have ever been recovered.

Thefts recorded by the same force in 2011 included a betting slip, a pen and a fleece jacket.

A spokesman for Devon and Cornwall Police said staff are encouraged to report stolen goods regardless of value.

Jason Gronby, 43, said: 'In the spirit of openness and transparency these details are recorded and made available to the public through Freedom Of Information requests.

'In the case of the nail varnish it was recorded as a theft in the workplace but no formal investigation took place.'

Sources

• IFYMB! "Red-faced cops report theft of biscuit tin from... their own police station" The Sun, 17 April 2013