UnNews:Justin Bieber gives birth to his first child with Hailey Baldwin

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Friday, May 10, 2024

The Biebs with his baby bump
Justin Bieber with his newborn child

LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA, UNITED STATES -- At about 12PM PST noon, infamous singer-songwriter Justin Bieber gave birth to his first child, a daughter. While that may confuse fans into believeing that his wife, Hailey Baldwin, was pregnant, it turns out that that apparently Bieber's genes had deflected back into his own body, making him pregnant as a result.

This wasn't the first time that was happening. A couple of years ago, Bieber had become pregnant through eating lots of tacos, which attracted his own sperm, but ended up miscarriaging the baby.

While giving birth, one of his songs, "We're Friends Now" featuring a certain ginger as the lead singer, was playing in the background. The Biebs decided to name the baby after Ed's given Japanese surname, but since he doesn't know that language well, he had to consult Google Translate to do so instead, thus giving the baby's name as "Violet Blue Bieber".

UnNews would like to congratulate the Biebers on their first child. Not.

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