UnNews:Catalan human chain broken by human bolt cutter

This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation.

12 September 2013

The chain coursing through the Catalan countryside just moments before it was severed.

Catalonia's latest demonstration for independence from Spain ended in chaos yesterday as a 250-mile human chain, stretching from the French border to Valencia, was severed by pro-government activists forming a human bolt cutter.

The Via Catalana was organised for the Diada, Catalan National Day, and follows on from record numbers marching last year.

The demonstration reached its height at 17:14, a symbolic reference to the region's loss of independence in the war almost 300 years ago, as hundreds of thousands of Catalans waved flags, botifarra and other symbols of independence at the sky.

However, just thirty seconds into the celebrations, a large group of men in Sitges, just outside of Barcelona, suddenly began to make their own formation. The men, who had been dressed as homosexuals so as not to arouse attention in the seaside town, suddenly whipped off their leather jackets and rainbow-colored ponchos to reveal Real Madrid shirts.

One Catalan witness, Joan Puig LLullullull, told us, "They weren't many, maybe only 1000. And we were millions. But they made themselves into this sharp form, and they cut at us and cut at us until we let go. They say horrible things about Franco, the past, and Andrés Iniesta´s sexuality."

Spanish Prime Minister Mariano Rajoy refused to condone the attacks, but said, "I am just sad this has come a week too late, because it would have really shown the International Olympic Committee how good we are at organising large scale events."

Sources

• Leverage, "Catalans join hands in huge human chain for independence from Spain" Guardian, September 12, 2013