Zork 3

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 Ur Grue Score: -9574394874 Moves: 47


> Blinding Flash!

The Ur-Grue takes precisely 0 damage due to its protective aura of darkness.

However, the light blinds it, and it wastes 3 turns groping around for you-


> Extreme Sarcasm!

It takes x damage, in which x is an integer.


> Extreme Sarcasm!

It takes x damage, in which x is an integer.


> Shuddup!!!

You yell, "Shuddup!", startling the Ur-Grue, causing it to fumble and step on a pin.

It takes y damage, in which y is an integer.


> Arrgh! I hate algebra!

OK, ok. What do you want to do for your self-preservation?