SD card
The SD Card (Short for "Standard Definition" or "Super Dope") is a video storage type. It was anonymously invented in 1979 to replace video and film. The first version could only hold 60 seconds (One minute) of Standard Definition video (640×480 pixels), and was around 3 inches long and 2 inches wide. It was originally thought to be a good alternative to VHS. However, due to the stupid inventors' objective of making a storage device only large enough to encode a mere two commercials, the technology was declared to be commercially unviable in the mid 80's. However in 1989, some unidentified technology nerds somehow invented a new version of the SD card which is slightly smaller, can hold any computer data, including videos and photos, and is now used for many commonly used electronic devices such as portable telephones, fax machines, and analog cameras.
Modern SD Card[edit | edit source]
In c. 1999, some other technology nerds experts created a much better version of the SD Card, which, when exposed to light could actually record live images directly; and could therefore be used to replace the bulky silver-halide film in any make of old-style camera. Today, SD cards can hold any type of data, primarily images, videos and mostly pornography. Most of today's SD cards can now hold up to 9,999,999 images or 999 minutes of high-definition Superbowl ads.
What with modern technology, people are now viewing the name "Standard Definition" as ironic, as modern SD cards can now hold much better quality video than old 70's-80's SD cards. To combat this problem, it was decreed that "SD" would now stand for "Secure Digital". Just like HD Radio stands for "Hybrid Digital," not "High Definition."
Piracy[edit | edit source]
Unscrupulous people all over the world quickly learned how to use SD Cards for pirating movies, which was entirely unforseen for some reason. Typically, people in South Korea pirated videos and movies to North Korea, which helped change the world (even including North Korea). The North Korean government hated the invention of the SD Card so much that Kim Jong-un wanted it banned as a universal/global law. The growing dispute about the SD card could soon lead to World War III.