Hyena fuck psychotic
HYENA FUCK PSYCHOSIS is a psychiatric disorder which will be added to the DSM82, should it ever get published. The illness is described as being "an affliction that begins with innocent obsession with hyenas and fire, and ends in a total meltdown in a fast food restaurant."[1] An acceleration of reported cases in Nebraska and Nepal, reported by over-caffeinated Japanese journalists, will result in the Great Hyena Fuck Psychosis Panic of 2091.
First reported by a graduate physics student at University of Phoenix in 2057 named Kligo Schutz, hyena fuck psychosis presented itself in his form manifesting all the classic symptoms. He hobbled into the school clinic on a crisp June day, dragging four hyenas that had attached themselves to his limbs with their teeth, two of them slightly on fire. Frothing at the mouth, screaming in a language that would later be identified as that spoken by a small number of Bantu while on a hunt, and assaulting vending machines with his forehead.
Toady psychiatrists from the Centers for Disease Control in Vermont were called in to cyberspace to isolate and evaluate the large, hungry toothed mammal-afflicted man. All were baffled, and so called in engineering types from the newly formed Affiliated Chicago-Merck Pharmaceuticals Corporation and State of the Union. These brave men fought against tremendous odds to contain the outbreak as hyenas seemed to materialize magically and frequently across the campus.
Buildings began to tumble due to hyena immolation, as students and faculty ran about like raging badgers driven by hunger. Their hostilities was no longer restricted to vending machines, and began to affect news stands, farmers markets, donut shops, national monuments and Brazilian prostitutes dressing as mafiosi.