Conservapedia: The game

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Conservapedia is an online text-based game created on November 21st, 2006 by Andrew Schlafly, a liberal activist and teacher. There are several different ways to play the game. The object of the game is to try to play as long as possible without getting banned. When a user is banned, it is game-over and the player must start over again.

Styles of Play[edit]

The Parodist[edit]

One way is to insert as much humour and parody into articles without the evil conservative users finding out. Examples include the Pacific Northwest Arboreal Octopus, Chrono Trigger, Final Fantasy VII, and the Tragically Hip. Most of the Conservative Sysops are ignorant of anything that occurs outside of their tiny world of creationist and right-wing Christian beliefs so it is possible to get away with this for a long time. This is one of the most fun ways to play the game

The Common Vandal[edit]

This is probably the most fun way to play after the parodist. There are different ways to play the common vandal. The easiest way is to copy and paste offensive material to as many Conservapedia pages as possible and when blocked, disconnect and get another IP address. Before July 2007 this was easy to do but proxy servers are now required as the Sysops have discovered IP range blocks. Once a range is blocked it is rarely ever lifted. Two of the most famous Conservapedians, Icewedge and the Halifax Troll were common vandals although the Halifax Troll started out as a Parodist.

The Scientist[edit]

This role involves putting actual scientific fact into articles about evolution, geologic time periods, and astronomy. Unlike humour, which Conservatives have no awareness of, science is something they are aware of. Unfortunately, aware of does not mean support. Sysops are extremely hostile to science and fact which means any scientific fact not in line with conservative beliefs is quickly reverted and the user banned. This makes the scientist role rather futile.

The Liberal[edit]

Similar to the scientist, the Liberal places true information into political and historical articles. Reactions against this type of player are just as swift and brutal to those against the scientist and these are among the least successful types of players.

The Fake Conservative[edit]

This involves making the articles on Conservapedia seem even more extreme then they already are. This role is pretty difficult to play because it is nearly impossible to make Conservapedia any more extreme without issuing a fatwa against someone. For this reason, the Fake Conservative is one of the most difficult roles to play. If you play it well enough, you may one day get to become a Sysop and wreak havoc on Conservapedia

The Genuine Conservative[edit]

This is probably the most difficult role to play for a couple of reasons. First, it involves having ideas that go against the laws of physics, chemistry, biology, and dozens of other types of science. It also involves hundreds of hours spent reverting "liberal" and "moronic vandalism". Unlike the other roles which are occasional and casual, this role is very time-consuming. It is best suited to male virgins with no life and no friends.

What You Will Need To Play[edit]

  1. A computer with internet connection
  2. A few hours of spare time
  3. A dynamic IP address so you can create multiple accounts from multiple IP addresses
  4. Access to a proxy server, now required since Andy discovered range blocks
  5. A good sense of humour

Famous Players[edit]

  1. Icewedge
  2. Steve Carson (alledgedly arrested by the FBI)
  3. The Halifax Troll (Canada's greatest Conservapedian)
  4. Andrew Schlafly (Lord and Master of Conservapedia)
  5. Karajew
  6. TK
  7. Jpatt

See Also[edit]

External links[edit]

Official Conservapedia game site