College stereotypes

Fun Fact: College students will protest anything.
Meet us down at Smith Campus Center: we're going to hold a march!

College stereotypes are certain types of people that you might end up seeing, rooming with, getting laid with, partying with, have to deal with in Psychology 101 with, and transmit DNA from the barf and drool from hangover with in college. They say there are no more cliques in college, but that's a bunch of bullshit. There are cliques til you enter the nursing home. Probably there are cliques in the graveyard when you are dead. We got the not cool dead people, oh that one is kinda a misfit and is left out in that section. Oh there much be a graveyard party for the cool dead people out there.

Anyway, cliques are not something you hear about on 16 year old Teen Dramas like Gossip Girl that is played at 4:30 on ABC Family, they are a part of life. But the biggest clique nuts are probably the high school freshman, because they base their life, liberty, and happiness on what clique they are in.

Frat Boys/Sorority Girls

Duffman is a perfect example of a frat boy! Oh yeah!!

These people are here on trust funds or parents' money. These guys generally have their hat backwards, wear short shorts and golf shirts, and tend to treat college like some big party. The more drinking the better, the more sex the better, the more like Animal House, the better...live it up. They are usually business majors, and tend to get through life with trust funds. For them, chauvinism is acceptable; the more pussy they get, the better respected they are, for some bizarre reason. Sorority chicks are the same thing as frat boys and they spend more money on their tits than their textbooks and act like sluts to get some cock from a stranger or a frat boy. They try to act stupid to cover up how dumb they really are. They are shallow and most of them are dumb cunts. This group is at high risk of alcohol poisoning and overdosing on cocaine.

Average Bland College Student

Your typical college student is always taking a nap

These are the kids that are advertised in the brochures. They go home on the weekends to eat and get their laundry basket filled. They tend to be shy and mind their own business, and they have their group of 3-4 friends they hang out. They are probably in at least 3 or 4 clubs to break the ice, and they are usually seen in the lounge area of the campus with a mix of boys and girls usually reading some type of textbook or checking Facebook. They look like they bought their clothes from Macy's or Kohls for discount, and they seem to don't give a crap. Your business student is a good example or nursing student. Usually found in a sociology class or psychology or something basic. The most common person you'll meet. They are usually found texting on some cell phone and wasting their parents cell phone plan on texting. They are usually always on a laptop with some type of music blaring, mainly some type of rock or rap, or some boring adult contemporary crap like Jack Johnson or some Top 40 stuff.

Artsy Fartsy Student

Your typical artsy students always wearing the glasses to make them look "intellectual"

These kids usually are wearing some weird, hippy dippy clothing and tend to be leftist....maybe darn near commie. They are usually next to the art room and seem to like discussing topics like books and independent films. They are usually wearing thick-rimmed glasses and might be sort of emoish or hipster. Facial hair, horn rimmed glasses, and experimental drug use is a must. Think rims like emo glasses are the way to go. They like to read too and always cracking a book. They often prefer books and movies no one has ever heard of and shun books on the New York Times bestseller list and successful movies everyone else enjoys.

Music Kid

They are always performing something!

There are about 3 types of music kid. You got your gangsta looking beat making and rapper. Some are black and some are white and they are usually more softcore gangsta. Or you got your rocker type kid that is rehearsing in a college band. Or you got your immature drama theatre kid that run around and think it is cool to act stupid because they are in band or in choir. The band and the choir kids are about the same thing. You don't have a divide like you are in high school; it looks like it is the same bunch as any other music kid. They usually wear something related to music for clothing either looking like a rapper or looking like a band member, or wears some music designs on their clothing or some type of band shirt. They fit the best with theatre, sociology, psychology, and art people. Music kids tend to be listening to some music with big ass headphones or an iPod with 263645 songs on there or someone who is playing guitar in the hall. Some many write and record music and put it on MySpace and are generally the few college kids that are on MySpace these days with an exceptions for whores.

Band/Choir/Theatre Kids

These are the kids that don't have their own band but they are big band geeks in the college. They love to sing and dance wherever they go, or talk like they are acting all the time. They are usually fans of anything Disney, and not Hannah Montana Disney, I mean Walt Disney, and have at least a few Disney movies and do like a few musicals. They watch "Glee" obsessively, despite the fact that nobody on that show has anything that can even remotely be considered "talent". They tend to like to listen to classic rock too especially if you are a band geek and tend to have some sort of ADHD. These kids are also religious and they tend to be involved with church activities. They are not much different than the music kids but the music kids tend to be a little more interesting than creating music while band kids are just there to...be weird. They mix well with stoners, artsy fartsy, andd music kids.

Anime Nerds

These kids are usually your misfitty kids that dress like the band/theatre kids or the gamers and they tend to like anything Japansese. These kids are also shy and lonerish too and are interested in Eastern junk. They seem to collect Pokémon, Manga, watch Naruto and some half ass anime cartoons. They obsess on watch some obsure Japanese stuff and tend to quote them, along with find leaked version of the internet. Yugioh abridge and the entire DVD collect of Cowboy Bebop in Japanese and uncensored is a must. Extra points if it was bootlegged off the internet. A lot of them are gamers too and tend to like the more classic video games like Pokémon and Legend of Zelda. A lot of them might not be a Japanese decent, most of them are probably a French, German, or Finnish descent (Japanese and Finlanders are similar...Suomi anyone). They love learning Japanese and seem to listen to Jpop, Kpop, Russianpop, or Finnpop.

Gamers

These kids tend to be obsessed on playing video games and it is their life. It is an utter requirement for them to play endless games of World of Warcraft and must be up to Level 85. A PlayStation 3 is required, along with Gamecube and a Wii. Real gamers don't play wussy crap such as Madden and that Wii sports garbage. They play good shit such as Left for Dead 3, Grand Theft Auto, and anything with some good ol strategy, blood, and Lan party access. They also may be interest in the Internet culture but they never use the wussy Facebook apps. IMVU and Second Life accounts are required. Gamers generally have a similar look of wearing dark colors and glasses for eye strain of sitting in front of a video game screen, along with hoodies in dark colors to show that they rather be gaming than taking a bath.

Stoners

Typical stoner kid.

These guys are like a cross between the frat boy and the artsy fartsy kid. They tend to be smoking and using those narcotics and claim to see the rainbow. They tend to like Bob Marley and stone out to Lazy Town when they are loaded. They are hippy dippy people and like music to dope out too or any type of '90s grunge. They can be gamers too but they are not WOW type gamers they are the old skool nintendo people.

Redneck

You might find them more in your hick community college than in Harvard but these are the kids that resemble the frat boys, but seem to like wearing camouflage and rearrange their schedule for their hunting and NASCAR schedules. They have a passionate love for their cousins, room with their brother (I mean the actual brother not the gangsta brothers), watch more NASCAR, and try to get beer from those frat guys. They usually have anti-Obama and NRA bumper stickers and are lucky to get that scholarship because they are in a family of 13 kids and suffer from severe in breeding resulting in brain damage. They use FOX News as a source of "reliable information" and dislike books without pictures.

Gangsta

Straight up G's dawg!

These guys are the guys that the cops watch and they gotta be with their homiez. They tend to be a lot like the frat boys and the stoners. You don't see these guys as much as they used to be but there are two types.

Colored gangstas - these are Mexican, Arab, Indian, and of course, black. They are into the new skool swag culture and not into the hardcore stuff. Wiggers - these are these white guys that listen to ringtone raps and Emimen type junk. They are usually gamers and love the WWE, and deep down they are stoners. Real G - this is the ones that have it tough. They lived the street life. Very rare in many universities and are the ones that worked their way into their college education after time with gangs and prison.

Hipsters

Does this really need an explanation?

These are like music kids but they like to dance. It is music kid, stoner, artsy, gamer, and frat rolled all into one. Usually into Euro life and like dancing, wears bright color, and has annoying dance music coming out of their studios. They probably like other electronic genres such as drum and bass, trance, dubstep, happy hardcore, chillwave, new wave (totally!), nintendocore, Lady Gaga and late 90s bubblegum pop. They love the Peace Love Energy and Respect. There is even raver like gangsta and these are these urban kids that like the shutter shades and Kanye. These are the crazy kids that can get laid with any girl in the club, but still dress like a fag and wear scenexcore clothing. They think the New Boyz are the shit and any underground eurodance music and porn grooves. They also like these glowsticks...and they wear glowsticks all around their necks.

Gay/Lesbian people

This group of students is either out of the closet and out spoken or just discovering who they are. They roam in groups and have better hygiene that their peers. Gay college men get laid more than their straight male peers (often getting fucked by "straight" guys). The lesbians tend to dress like they're former Marines and use words that give sorority girls migraines. Bisexuals mind fuck everyone. Transexuals and Transvestites keep college life unpredictable and kinky (and are usually the secret fuck buddies of frat boys and sorority girls alike). They throw the best Halloween parties (orgies).

Adult Students

You are never too old for college! Some of them could be easily your grandma that actually lived the true "frat life" from 1962 and you are not doing it right.

These are these students that are about 40 or 50 years old that got laid off from their job, have 2 kids on their own, and they need to find their direction in life. They usually know more than the professor and constantly arguing with them. Most of the time they are discussing some political topics or trying to frat like the younger college students. Some adult students just want to relive their frat years or make up the frat they haven't had the first time. Many of them are in mid life crisis. One midlife crisis class is the motorcycle training course.

4.0 Students

These students wants to be on the Presidents List, The Deans List, The Firefighters List, The Whatchamacallit list. You never see them hanging outside of the library or their dorm, studying, studying, studying to get that 4.0. GASP I got a 3.9, I am going to drop out.

Child Prodigy Students

They are very rare but you sometimes get these extremely smart children that are like Jimmy Neutron that are going to take on the world. Many of them have an IQ of 200 or something, and they tend to even outsmart the professors with their brilliant ideas. Occasionally, but almost always they have some type of quirk such as Asperger's Syndrome or OCD or whatnot, which every child prodigy has.

College professor

Your typical college professor

Usually on the extreme left or something, love NPR and to thump whatever they heard on NPR, and always have some eccentric about them. Many become professors since they are too weird to do anything else or too lazy. Frequently enrage right wing students, rednecks, and non traditional adult students by using large complicated words, small difficult words and common sense.

Special ed kid

This is the part where I’m going to be ableist. These are these kids that are not even smart enough to read, but they worked the system to get a college education so they can survive in the world. They are annoying as fuck and they will try to get laid with anything that can get their hands on, but they don't have the intelligence or social cues to do so. They are trying to be cool like everyone else and you see them at every college event, trying to fit in. Be nice or they might bring an AK-47 to school, remember that. They are people too

The Label Kids

These kids usually spend their time on the internet trolling and labeling. Sadly they have never been to a real college, because they are still teens. Some theorize that their cliche view points are due to over masturbating to shitty high school themed middle school movies. They have come to believe that everyone fits into some cliche. Just like a shitty American pie movie. The idea that everyone is an individual seems to go right over their head. They tend to have trouble socializing with others. So, a majority of their social structure is comprised of a cock, hand, and their newfag friends on b.