Clicking
Clicking is an ancient Chinese sport. It was started by George W. Bush in 1252 April 32, as he was dropping by for his daily oil raid of other countries. Clicking soon became a trend, and was played all over the world. The NCL (National Clicking League) was soon started. Follow this wonderful article to learn about the wonders of clicking.!
Origin[edit | edit source]
Like I said, on that wonderful day of April 32, George W. Bush was stopping in China to steal some extra oil, when he had a horrible twitch in his body. George started vibrating, and accidentally put his hand over an ancient Chinese computer mouse. With the speed of one thousand jack-rabbits, the vibrations made George keep clicking the mouse at unimaginable speed. A Chinese banker saw this while on his way to collect the 110% taxes, and told the Emperor. After burning the banker, the Emperor decided to copy this sport a his own. Although he tried, he could never get the knack of it. So, the Emperor decided to get his men to find the REAL person who invented the sport. They found George Bush in the White House, complaining on the phone that he didn't care that Iraq wouldn't give them their oil. They snuck up on George and threw him in a sack of potatoes. The Emperor put George on television, and started the NCL, which soon became as popular as hockey. The Emperor started this, burning whoever stopped their twitchiness.
Rise and Fall of the Clicking World[edit | edit source]
After clicking was broadcast many countries took to it. Japan, Canada and Germany were the first ones to act. They immediately started making clicking tryouts, looking for athletes with a certain twitch. Soon, fifty different countries had clicking teams. It was only a matter of time before the Olympics took to it. With thousands of teams going to watch their clicking teams every day, the money kept pouring in. It was only a matter of time for something bad to happen. NCL was sued twelve months before the Olympics. By who? The NCL. The National Crap League. For taking their name, the National Crap League sued the National Clicking League for taking their name. If the National Crap League went through with the sue, the National Clicking League would lose $987,765,432,185,582,792,9111,000.01. The National Clicking League went to the first person they could think of. The Emperor of China.
Assassination of Michael Jackson[edit | edit source]
The mission was to go to the president of the National Crap League. Michael Jackson. They snuck into the head building, blending in with the wall. Sneaking around a door, they listened to Michael Jackson arguing on the phone. "Plastic crap is a great idea! Darn. I think I'm melting. And remember, anything kid over seven doesn't feel nice. Yeah. Thanks Chuck." Just as Michael was putting the phone down, they took out the handy-dandy potato sack. Tieing the sack, they threw it (along with Michael) into the furnace. Days after the assassination, the suing was called off, and the National Crap League went out of business.
News Flash![edit | edit source]
Michael Jackson was found in a furnace last night! He had melted and hardened over, putting him in an unusual shape. And yes, he is dead. No word on how his fans feel, but their is a sigh of relief from children under seven.
Pointless Piece[edit | edit source]
This is an entirely pointless piece that I put in to get on your nerves. ha. haha. haha!!
IMPORTANT!!![edit | edit source]
This next piece will actually have a point. I promise.
Shhhhhhhhh! It's a secret![edit | edit source]
What i'm about to tell you is a VERY important piece.(SEE? I didn't lie!) There is a secret to clicking! Yes! You won't get anywhere just slamming the mouse. You have to apply tension to your hand, until it starts to vibrate. It creates an amazing sensation, and you start to rapidly click. For a perfect clicking, it must sound as if there is no pausing. People in the NCL practice for years to get this vibration, but only few prevail. About 0.00000001% So don't get discouraged!
It's okay!:)(Yeah right!:( )[edit | edit source]
Like I said, very few prevail. I'll give you one hint. If you can't make your hand vibrate after five tries, give up. You'll never get it. For those who do, congratulations! Who know! You might even make it to the NCL one day!;)