Biocomputer
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The Biocomputer is currently the top-competitor of metallically manufactured computers that contain excess steel, silicon, and other fake materials. The biocomputer uses an untato for power since the Untato is a biological battery; as opposed to batteries purely composed of metal and acid.
Unlike the modern personal computer; the biocomputer is strictly composed of biological cells hence the bio- prefix. This type of computer is obsoleting the factory-made computers since it can just clone itself with reproductive organs. Computer factories will thwart to obsolescence with these maneating supercomputers.
Evolutionary origin[edit | edit source]
Genetic engineers have monkeyed around with human bodies trying to manupulate them into superintelligent beings. A human brain extracted from a person diagnosed with cancer is thrown into a centrifuge, which turns the brain into a biological microprocessor. Humans have thought that the biocomputer could replace conventional computers that waste metallic resources.
Innovative features[edit | edit source]
Humans can program the biocomputer by using their voice because biology can perform better than electronic metal devices that require massive technological advances to implement. The human brains of dead people can serve as better memory banks than silicon-based chips from factory-produced matter.
Basically, a biocomputer is a mutated human that can process as a computer system. Unlike factory-built computers, the biocomputer can be expanded from a superdumb terminal with 2D sidescrolling games with black and white graphics to a fully advanced computer with 3D gaming capabilities with up to 1 billion color values.
Criticism[edit | edit source]
Bodily functions[edit | edit source]
People who work in offices have found big lumps of turd lying around on the floors. People have put diapers on these pooping monsters. Biocomputers eat skin of humans because they are hungry for biological matter unlike dumb metal computers.
Concentrating[edit | edit source]
For a biocomputer to work, it must be in a state of concentration, optimally in what is known as a "flow state". The problem is, a biocomputer in that state is extremely dangerous. On one hand, a biocomputer in flow has been measured to reach a peak power of 5 gigawatts, due to the high flow of current; on the other hand, high-speed blood flow in biocomputer processors causes strong shear heating and can make the computer burst into flames. Nevertheless, engineers have successfully prevented these incidents by inducing an existential overflow or subduing the biocomputer with pneumatic drills. (The noise is the actual destructive agent here.)
Programs written for the Biocomputer[edit | edit source]
- Bicrosoft Windows - (from bio- and Microsoft) a version of Microsoft Windows written for the biocomputer.
- BioDoom - a remake of Doom for the biocomputer
- BIOS - a biological operating system.
- BioSIC - a biological dialect of the BASIC programming language.
- Biotris - a biologically programmed version of Tetris.
- Biua - a biological version of the Lua programming language.
- Super Birio Bros. - a clone of Super Mario Bros.