Welsh Expansionalist Movement
The Welsh Expansionalist Movement grew out of an earlier group of revolutionary estate agents, the so called "Sons of Glengarry Glen Ross". Famed for their random acts of destruction against colonists' holiday homes and seafront properties, the group had become dormant by the late 1980s.
Early Movement[edit | edit source]
Several former members, against the cessation of activity, formed a break-away group. Led by William (Bill) Williamson ap Williams (reknowned Cunning Linguist) the groups aim was the "Welshification" of Wales and other things. Their main weapon has been the expansion of relatively short words into longer vowel laden versions. The movement was underground for a long time... quite literally, underground as it started down the mines. Like all Welsh movements, parties, forces, revolutions, wars, accidents, speeches, births, deaths, catastrophes, letters, cultures, supermarket chains and Elephant's-foot-waste-paper-basket-manufacturers, the mines were an ideal place to begin as Williamson ap Williams' father: "Went down 'em."
This movement is solely responsible for starting the Kosovo war, since the Welsh intended to use captured Serbian territories as grazing grounds for their sheep and swarms of Rossers.
Examples of Welsh Expansionism[edit | edit source]
- Thankyou - 'twll dy din ti saes'
- Yes - 'beth syn cropian ar dy goes'
- No - 'Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobllllantysiliogogogoch'
Known Members[edit | edit source]
- Tom Jones
- Rhys Jones
- Alun Jones
- Tomos Jones
- Mohammed Jones
- Gwydion ap Laden
- Llynowylldain Dwrgynnwllwr
- Glengarry Glen Ross III
- Dai
- Jones The Member
- Dewi
- Lyndon Rosser (Although known to be a radicalist within the group. Is considering breaking away to form "The Welsh Peoples of Wales Welsh Expansionalist Movement")
- Mick Jagger
- DJ Satal.... A fucking Nutter!
Connections to other terrorist organizations[edit | edit source]
The only known connection the Welsh Expansionalist Movement has is to the radical Quebec Separatist Hippie Brigade, which is headed by basketball superstar Steve Nash. No official trading of information or resources has been discovered, though a raid in the Montreal headquarters of the QSHB uncovered several spools of wool.
This organisation is not to be confused with the Expansionalist Welsh Movement, who killed himself off in a suicide attack last year.
A semi-offical enemy organisation is the "Williams for England" movement based in Newport, they are considered to be traitorous and unsheep like.