User talk:Pizza Spaghetti Mafia!

Welcome!

Somebody has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic.

Why do I need to provide this welcome message? Oh, because you're a new editor/noob/newbie here and no other fool friendly person has welcomed you yet.

So Hello, Pizza Spaghetti Mafia!, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, that's the toilet. A little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for people like you:

• Beginner's Guide
• Our Vanity Policies - why we don't care to see articles about your friends
• How to be funny and not just stupid

If you read anything at all, make it the above three links. And please read a few featured articles so you can see what's considered the good stuff (make sure you find the featured version). If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, try these:

• About Uncyclopedia and The five pliers of Uncyclopedia
• How to get started editing on uncyclopedia
• Help Pages - if you need help with a specific issue

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button () above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.

At Uncyclopedia, writing articles is not a requirement, but it certainly is a fun and easy way to express your creativity. To write an article, it's recommended that you start it in your userspace (for example, User:Pizza Spaghetti Mafia!/Article about stuff) so you can edit it at your leisure. If you decide to create it in the cold world of mainspace, make sure it is in accordance with the policies laid out above, and if you're not done put the "Work-In-Progress" template - {{construction}} - on the top of it.

If you want to write and don't know where to begin, consider contributing to Uncyclopedia's current colonization of the week, a group writing project to improve a single popular article. Anyone is welcome to contribute, so come help out. I signed up, and they haven't killed me yet!

If the current colonization doesn't suit your fancy, then browse our rewrite and idea categories. We have lots of articles just sitting around for someone to improve, so don't be afraid - dive right in!

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, or ask an administrator on their talk page. Additionally, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. I was an adopted noob, and gosh was it cool. Simply leave a message on an adopter's talkpage to apply to be adopted. Again, welcome!  King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  20:43, November 5, 2009 (UTC)

About your adoption request

This is in regard to I love you on my talk page. I'm posting my response here for for your convenience.

Thanks for your request.

If you checked what I posted on Uncyclopedia:AAN/Adopters, you'll see that I make some silly comment about people auditioning. I don't expect anyone to do a song and dance (although that would be nice), just some indication that you seriously want to be a productive user here.

I checked through your edits, and it looks like you're trying to improve the site, which is good. I did revert your edit here; changes like that lead to warnings and even blocks, so consider this a friendly warning.

If you want to be successful here, I'd recommend doing what I and those who came before me have done:

• First, read those suggested links in your welcome, at least where it says, "If you read anything at all, make it the above three links." As long as you're not going to be writing articles about yourself or your friends or sticking in references in other articles, you can ignore the vanity one for right now, but read Beginner's Guide and How to be funny and not just stupid. I've read them, some of them more than once, and they really do help.

• Second, if you plan to follow them, let me know you've read them, either on my talk page or here. Then I'll very likely say "yes" to your adoption request. I can be a pain in the ass sometimes, but I'm really not that bad.

I'd also suggest you read some recently featured articles (check the Main Page, and you can also click on Featured content to the left of your screen). Get an idea what the regulars do and want around here.

I hope this helps. If you have any questions, feel free to post on my talk page. Happy editing! King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  21:08, November 5, 2009 (UTC)

You better be Italian.

If not, I'm going to have to bring out some of my buddies to "take care" of you for falsely claiming my favorite stuff. Se potete leggere questo, clicca qui. - ho scopato tua madre nel culo - 19:57,6November,2009

Galileo Pee Review

I Pee Reviewed Galileo based on revision 4205810 of 13:51, November 7, 2009. I hope this helps! King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  06:06, November 8, 2009 (UTC)

With English not being your original language, I got a couple suggestions for you that might help. (ChiefjusticeDS and PuppyOnTheRadio told me about these). One is Uncyclopedia:Foreign Office which can help. There's also User:Siddhartha-Wolf who may not known Italian, but might know someone who writes both Italian and English and could help. As far as adoption, I'd be happy to help in general, but because I don't know Italian, am afraid I probably wouldn't be much help to you as am adopter. If there are two things that require a high level of fluency in a language, they are writing like an encyclopedia and writing humour. You might want to check AAN and the list it links to, and see if you can find someone who does know Italian and English who could be more helpful to you as an adopter than I could be. Good luck and happy editing! King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  02:47, November 9, 2009 (UTC)

Category Issue

I removed the non-existent category from your user page. Links to non-existent categories mess up the wiki. --Mn-z 03:23, December 20, 2009 (UTC)