User talk:Captain Carcass

Welcome!

Hello, Captain Carcass, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for nooblets:

• Beginner's Guide
• How to be funny and not just stupid

If you read anything at all, make it the above two links. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, try these:

• About Uncyclopedia and The five pliers of Uncyclopedia
• How to get started editing on uncyclopedia
• Everything you ever wanted to know, but were afraid to ask
• Help Pages - if you need help with a specific issue

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button () above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, or add the following: {{help}} to this page along with a message and someone will come along and help you if they can. Again, welcome! 

Now, being less formal, the above message you will see in every user talk page. However, that not means this is an automated message. Really, I had to click myself on your user talk, copy-paste this stuff and submit it with my own fleshy finger. Now some personal non-official advices:

• You may think some stuff that appear everywhere here are cool, but those things are utterly overused and not anymore welcome. Among the sophisticated intelligentsia, we call this phenomenon cliché, and Oscar Wilde, Chuck Norris, Russian Reversal and Mr. T. are surelly worn out to the death. Just don't mention them except you have a very good reason.
• Another stuff we veterans hate is Random Humor. Don't put chicken from Mars in an article about George Washington. That's it.
• Humor is a subtle subject. You will find people that tell you that talking about excrets is just bad taste - count me among them - and others will find this kind of stuff the pinnacle of subversive irony. Just stay calm and try to learn what works better. No one here will ban you if you don't impose your ideas on already created stuff.
• Never recreate a deleted article. Never. Never redo a reverted edit. Never.
• And don't be afraid. We don't eat people. Usually. -- herr doktor needsAcharge  [scream!] 19:14, 20 January 2007 (UTC)

Your article

I'm working on this weekend so I can't help you now, but I will give a closer look to you article later on, okay? At very first sight, you seem to be on the right path. -- herr doktor needsAcharge  [scream!] 16:27, 21 January 2007 (UTC)

Okay, now let's talk. First, when you want some feedback, the proper place for asking is at the Pee Review. Create an entry linking to your article and people will evaluate it. But, as I welcomed you and as I think it would be unpolite just asking you to create a pee entry, here goes some suggestions regarding WTF:

1. You write pretty well and in a pseudo-serious way. That's what we like around here. But try to stick a little more to reality and just not making a meme salad bringing Inuit, WTF, Mesopotamia and Oscar Wilde to the same paragraph. This is what we call the dreaded Random Humor - it wouldn't change a thing if you just replaced "Mesopotamia" with "martians".
2. In this case, as it's an entirely "fictional" article, not connect to a real subject, you should be more focused in the "archeological" content you have invented. What about some more on the "historical research" on WTF?
3. Formatting tips: most articles here try to parody the writing style of wikipedia. So you better not start the article with a title, but rather with a little introductory paragraph. Enclose the first "What the fuck" with 3 apostrophes to make it bold, as is the rule in wikipedia. Images are always welcome as well, put some effort in the captions, they are part of the joke.
4. Aside from that, I guess you will learn what's hot here in few time. As I told you before, you write pretty well and that's a huge advantage. Keep on trying and write more stuff, I see you have potential. Sincerely. -- herr doktor needsAcharge  [scream!] 22:56, 21 January 2007 (UTC)

User page

By the way, your user page is not supposed to host a normal uncyc article. There it is the space to write something about yourself and link to your works. If you are not sure if an article worths being kept in the main space, create it as a subpage of your user page, but not as the user page itself. For example, type on your browser:

http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/User:Captain Carcass/What the fuck

...and start the article normally. Do you copy? -- herr doktor needsAcharge  [scream!] 03:15, 22 January 2007 (UTC)

I Would Like To Point Out

That our names are very similar...Captain Kickass 04:39, 9 February 2007 (UTC)