User:Yvonne/stuff

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Because some a$$ replaced this piece of shit with an even greater piece of shit and because the KKK deserves to be insulted and humiliated (they can burn in hell), i saved an article that i had spent a long time on to actually make it worthy of being an article.(and it still sucks. I do find some of the pictures funny though.


The KKK performing at one of their riveting live shows. Unfortunately, nobody showed up.

Ku Klux Klan is an organization founded by Bill Klinton to help support his election to the White House in 2008. It was also founded in part by God and The Baby Jesus to help spread the power of the white man to conquer the world by placing Televisions in the homes of all the dirty Muslims' houses.


The Beginning[edit | edit source]

A highly influential band started in 1865 at the University of the South, from the remnants of Magical Mystical Mole's Ku Klux Klan, with Mr. T on guitar, Paris Hilton on bass and George Bush on viola, they are just a group of friends who enjoy dressing up and attending exclusive slumber parties. Three years later, Michael Jackson joined the band (post blackness) on hooter clamp. They started the American Passtime on orders from Oprah to distract the people from WWII. They are known for their equal rights activism and general philanthropy.


In 1983, they held their most famous performance in outerspace, afterwards in which they got drunk and watched Armageddon thirteen times in a row. After this incident, Jean-Luc Godard was asked to leave. He said some bad words and somehow fell out of the window. Bruce and Hermann replaced Mr. T with Hitler, who was an excellent harp player and had a very ugly mustache. They also invited George Jefferson to be lead vocals. With him they recorded one of their most famous hits, Weed-Wackers, Lemon Stoppers. Later, in what was thought to be a horrible accident, Strom Thurmond lost his pants, and started a serious deodorant addiction. When asked to Komment, Strom told reporters, "Nose army! NOSE ARMY! K'lom glot fliday!!!"

In 1991, the Ku Klux Klan broke up. Seven years passed and they got back together for one last goodbye record Kalled A Special, Special, Kristmas Kard and A War Treaty. Unfortunately, a lyric offended a fan in which George Jefferson sings:

I'll row your boat
If you'll row minekock
That's my final Ultimatum!?
The Ku Klux Klan is particularly popular in Finland

Months later, a bomb was misteriously placed in the band's tour bus having twenty casualties in which none of the people Killed/hurt were actually in the band. They were all just groupies, one of which was Your mom. Afterwards, the band went and watched Ghostbusters!.

Soon Mr. T and Paris Hilton got back with the band and finished one of their half-done recordings for their next album Kalled Free Koke with A Purchase of Television. Although not Kritically successful, it was number 97 on the charts for 17 weeks in a row. If you play this song in reverse, you Kan hear messages about insider trading, and that's how they got busted.

No one knows why the KKK are so afraid of black people. The main reason for wearing their fancy dress is to hide using this very special Kamouflage. The intention is to hide in their surroundings and become invisible. The suit will make them look like trees, Kars, vacuum Kleaners, and even Santa Klaus. Y'know, like the Invisibility Kloak in Harry Potter.

The KKK's only fear.

They believe in God, but they are all afraid of dying because they fear that he is really a black man.

What happens to the KKK when they die? That's easy, this!

Past 5 Years-Present[edit | edit source]

The Ku Klux Klan announced on July 21, 2005 that they were planning to induct their first black member. It was rumoured that Eminem, Billy Konnoly or OJ Simpson had been asked to join but it was then announced that Vanilla Ice had been selected. They are also planning to change the name to the Kellogs Kornflakes Klub and become an equal opportunities employer in order to fit a changing Kustomer Klimate. The Kurrent leader of the KKK is Alex Buzgua, Kurrently located in Blue Island, IL. Kurrently of the Ku Klux Klan members remaining, only Gary Koleman remains after the rest of the group were killed off by Kobe Bryant and Karlton Banks.


Migration[edit | edit source]

It is a small Known fact that KKK members migrate. In the winter months the KKK Kan't hide efficiently enough in their southern enviornment, basically because it is no longer Halloween. So those racist Krackers trek all the way up to Kanada. This is because they need to blend into their surroundings, and what better surrounding than snow. One moment you look outside into a nice snowy evening, then, you turn around, turn back and BOOM! A flaming Kross right on your goddamn front lawn! And right on the fucking Kristmas display too! Fear not, for if you do live in Kanada, you have nature by your side. Usually polar bears will easily sniff out the anti-social hicks and eat them. But if you are in an area that bears don't live in (for example: Atlantis, Moridor) the easiest way to hunt and kill them is to look out for that Krazy guy wearing the tacky red robes, also known as the Red Dragon. There is always an assload of KKK fuckers hiding in their little hate holes behind him, hating, and other stuff. If you do see one, either Kall the Kops, Shoot him, or Kall the Nuu Nuxx Nation to Kome take Kare of the problem.

Discography[edit | edit source]

Studio Albums[edit | edit source]

The cover of their first studio album, which shot to the top of the charts despite their not existing at the time.
  1. Self Titled, 1775
  2. Minority Shminority, December 1776
  3. We Don't Want Racist Biggots in Our Schools, April 1812
  4. We're for Incest, June 1915
  5. Live at Auschwitz, January 1943
  6. Keep Them Rednecks in Their Place, January 1963
  7. Ku Klux Jam, June 1970
  8. It's Not Hate it's Love, February 1989
  9. We'll Have a Better Nation, Tammuz 666 B.C. (Unreleased until 1971)
  10. Niggaz 4 Life, April 1990
  11. Straight Outta Lynchburg, December 1991
  12. Darkies on the Run, August 1992
  13. I Gots A Raccoon Momma!" - The Ballad of Sally-May Joe & Cletus, July 1993
  14. The White Album, December 2003
  15. Trent Lott: A Tribute, March 2005
  16. The Boyz 'n' da Hood, August 2006
  17. I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas (Just Like the ones I used to know), Coming XMas 2006
  18. We don't care about Adolf Hitler- let him burn at our cross, September 2008
  19. Are You Afraid of the Dark?, March 2009
  20. Who's Afraid of the Big Black Wolf? January 2010

Singles[edit | edit source]

    • Get All the Crackerjacks Out Of Our Nation, July 1776
    • I Can't Remember How Many Cows I Have, April 1857
    • The Hiroshima Polka, March 1989
    • He ran off with that goat!, Harvest Season 1919
    • Weed-Wackers, Lemon Stoppers, May 1945
    • We're Gonna Party Like it's 1699! October 1988
    • White and Nerdy June 2856

And the newly released singles which are set to top the charts:

    • String That Wigger Up On The Telephone Pole August 2005
    • Run Nigger, RUN! March 2005

Clothing Style[edit | edit source]

The Klu Klux Klan's way of dress was inspired by the popular Kartoon The Peanuts when Charlie Brown and his friends dressed up as ghosts to preform the satanic rituals required for the ressurrection of The Great Pumpkin.

Critics[edit | edit source]

Many white music Kritics state that: "Yo! Those modafuckas shoulda stop this racist shit and buy some Eminem shit, nigga!" while Hitler claims that they "Unfortunately, will not resist these dark times in the United States."

Did You Know?[edit | edit source]

  • That Jean-Luc Godard was also a well-known anti-gambling activist. This was evident when hearing the lyrics to his controversial song Get All Blackjacks Out Of Our White Nation.

Quotes[edit | edit source]

Quotes Supporting the KKK

"I, George Dubya Bush, endorse the the KKK. Keep up your work and whipe out all those fuckin' niggas!"

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