User:Pentagrammatical

Humbug to you from Pentagrammatical. There are several things you should not mention in the vicinity of this page. The first is that Deep Purple are not the greatest band in the universe. The second is that Ronnie James Dio is not God. The third is... Oh, never mind. Say what you like. Just don't dis Purple or Dio.

Er - what?

I don't like talking about myself. Please, no. I can talk about Satan or heavy metal for hours, but not me. I can talk TO myself as well. Yes indeed. So.. I am a waffler.

The coolest way to die on the planet

DEATH BY STEREO!!!! Damn, the only thing that spoils the movie 'Lost Boys' is the fact that they don't kick lots of n00b ass...

But if the coolest guy has to die, there's worse ways of doing it. Death by stereo is the most awesome way to die ever.

Life, the Universe and Everything is equal to 42

Life is entirely random. It is also completely pointless, so we may as well make our own points. The easiest way of doing this is to cut your fingernails into claws and then varnish them grey/black, which gives a wonderfully realistically deadly look to them. They are also handy if you get jumped down an alley at midnight wearing a tight black dress. (Oh, sorry, <insert name here>, you're male? Never mind, life throws up some incredible circumstances occasionally)

Another thing that enriches life is fantasy. Since most of reality sucks (you wish, guys), fantasies are often the only way to get through.

As for god - humbug. IF he exists he isn't all nice and fluffy or he is schizophrenic and since he doesn't we don't have to worry about it. As for Satan - nah, he doesn't exist. It's just a convenient metaphor for the adversary of theology. So the answer might as well be 42

Warning : do not say what I have just said to evangelists. They may not give you any more free donuts.

RIP Ronnie James Dio

His music was a great influence on me, and he will be sorely missed. I never had the chance to see him live, and I deeply regret that.

Random shit I have written

All of these pages were at least BEGUN by me. I don't know how to add pictures, so if you can please feel free to. Please mourn my article on corpse paint. It died. Tourist - the stereotype needs help; I've added some stuff but I think it needs a fresh mind helping it.

• PMRC
• Flattery
• Deadline
• Oh my God! You're going to Hell!
• Tourist - the stereotype
• Candlemass
• HowTo: Attract Metal Chicks
• You Have Been Abducted
• UnNews:'I Slept With My Mobile Phone'; woman, 14
• Sexy guy
• Drum Duel
• Mania

\m/

I am a metalhead; I wear offensive shirts, I headbang to really loud music. I have long hair, but am not a hippie.

\m/

This user plays bass, because it attracts groupies without the need for excessive rehearsal time.

Satan loves this user, and will be seeing them in hell shortly.

This user is a Satanist and therefore is liable to sacrifice your dog.

This user is a complete, irredeemable person with a shotgun. They are Bat Fuck Insane, and navigate at a vomit.

NO

This user doesn't care.

NO